Brotherly Moments
by 9foxgrl
Summary: From the writer of The Madness of Kurosaki's sanity comes the next laugh out loud comedy featuring the N. America brothers & their sister Vinland. You will soon find why Risk is banned from the UN and stealing syrup is not worth it. How did England & France survive raising them? ENJOY!
1. Siblings Fights

Brotherly Moments

9foxgrl

_From the writer of The Madness of Kurosaki's Sanity comes...BROTHERLY MOMENTS featuring America and Canada and insanity of the G8! Please enjoy~!_

**Ch. 1 Sibling Fights**

"Both America and Canada are late." Germany said looking at his watch.

"Who?"

CRASH!

Everyone jumped as America ran in looking flustered. His hair was a mess, his jacket ripped, his shoes muddy, and looked like had just came from running in a marathon.

"America you're-"

"No time dude! Barricade the door!" America screamed as he shoved a chair under the door handles.

"What the Hell is going on?"

Before America could answer the door was busted open. Canada stood there holding a hockey stick smiling.

"I found you _Big Brother_."

America screamed and jumped out the window, despite being four stories up. The Nations sweat dropped as they heard the screeches of cars and America running across the street like a frightened alley cat.

"You're not getting away that easily." Canada called out in a sing song voice as he followed. He jumped out the window and landed on a car hood then bolted after his brother.

"Should we go after them vee~?" Italy asked.

In the distance they heard America scream like a girl.

"No." they all replied in unison.

Five minutes later they returned. America's head had been wrapped with bandages and holding a bag of ice to his bruised jaw and limping; while Canada had no injuries at all.

"What happened?" England asked him.

"My team beat his for the Stanley Cup." America muttered through his broken jaw.


	2. Risk

Ch. 2 - Risk

9foxgrl

Inspired by **Impressive Cans **Youtube video _Family Game Night _

Several nations of the UN were walking to the meeting hall nursing hangovers. All of them had gone drinking the night before and could not remember what happened after their…what number drink was that?

The only ones not effected were America and Canada who had other business to do.

"I can't believe how quickly you conquered Western Europe's vital regions America!"

The Nations stopped dead at the door closed door to the meeting hall.

"Oh come on. The hardest one to subdue was Russia. The Baltics and Ukraine were just as easily." America laughed. "I think I'll call this the American Empire."

"Of course."

The said large nation growled and Belarus inched forward with her knife.

"Besides Canada, I'm impressed with how short a time it took you to capture China and France's vital regions."

China gawked. France, who had been laughing perversely, paled.

"It was easy after I took over Japan and Switzerland"

Japan nearly fainted and Switzerland growled about to take out his gun.

"So whose next?"

*clatter*

"HA HA! I've set my sights on Italy's vital regions!"

Italy screamed. Romano and Germany busted down the door and were quickly followed by the other nations.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

America and Canada looked up from the table were they were sitting. In front of them was a board game with the world map on covered in red and blue pieces. Beside them, tossed carelessly aside was a box labeled RISK

"Hey guys what's up?" America cheered. "What took so long? Canada and I got bored waiting so we decided to play Risk!"

The Nations face faulted.

'_So they were just playing a game?'_

-Later-

"So…should we tell them about last night?"

"Later Bro. I can't wait to tell China he voided my debt last night."

"Before of after you show England that picture of him in his waiter outfit at the club dancing on the pole?"

"…I'll send it in an email. I would like my vital regions intact."


	3. Operation Syrup pt 1

Ch. 3 Operation: Syrup pt.1

9foxgrl

America was scared, and there were only a few things that scared this superpower.

1. England's cooking

2. Russia on a bad day

3. His boss finding out he created the Bat-Cave in Nevada

4. Belarus thinking that her brother is hiding in his fallout shelter.

5. Canada snapping

6. Being forced to become a vegan by Tony….again.

Now Canada was mild tempered and almost never lost him temper...unless you messed with his syrup. That and hockey...and moose.

But right now the main issue was syrup.

According to Vermont a majority of Canada's maple trees had been sucked dry. Now he was in Manada mode on mounted moose searching for the maple thief with a loaded rifle.

America just whimpered as he heard the door open down stairs. He swore he locked it.

"America? Where are you?"

"Dude! Germany, is that you?"

"No it's Father Chrismas, why the Hell did you miss our meeting?"

"...Is anyone else with you?" America asked as he peeked over the stair balcony.

"I am vee~!" Italy cheered.

"Konichiwa America-san." Japan replied.

America looked around and also saw France, Austria, and Russia. The Nations were surprised to see America dressed in trench gear from WWII. They had been curious when they drove up and found the house with boarded up windows.

"Oh, it's just you." America sighed. "Wait...where's Britain?"

"He and Prussia went to visit Canada."

America paled. "Oh G- He's gonna die!"

"What?"

"He's in Manada mode! Someone is stealing from his maple trees!"

There was a dead pause before France started screaming and ran out the door to rescue Britain. Russia and Germany who had seen 'Manada' before paled.

"This does not bode well."

"Who is this Manada-san?" Japan asked.

"For your own sake, I pray you never find out."


	4. Big Sister Vinland

Ch. 4 Big Sister Vinland

9foxgrl

What many don't know was that America and Canada have a big sister. Her name was Vinland; she was the representation of the original colony that the Nordic countries had founded in what became Canada. She had a mix of Denmark, Finland, and Iceland's facial characteristics with long blond hair and cool eyes, a knack for magic like Norway, and Sweden's personality. In other words she was a Viking in a pretty girl's body.

Normally she stayed away from the UN and kept her existence a secret.

_Why: Because she was hunting a monster that tried to kill her brothers after it devoured half of the Roanoke colony. But that's another story. _

She had spent her brother's early colonial years teaching them survival skills, and taking care of them, especially when France and England had to return to Europe.

"_Stupid bastards; leaving children who can barely fight off a bear by themselves. Not knowing what lurks in these woods." _She would say. _  
_

But after years of solitude she decides to make a comeback.

* * *

America and Canada paled as they saw who was in the door in the middle of a meeting.

"Big Sis? What are you doing here?"

"BIG SISTER?" several Nations screamed in shock.

Vinland looked around, glared at France and England in a way that would turn them to icebergs, than glared at her brothers.

"…Um…Big sister, is something wrong?" Canada piped as she walked to where they were sitting.

"You two. Spar. After meeting." she said in her normal cold tone then walked out.

As soon as the doors closed America and Canada grabbed each other crying hysterically. "We're going to die! She's going to kill us!"

"Who was that?" Norway asked.

"Our big sister; Vinland." Canada choked.

"Or as we call her the Scary Valkyrie of North America."

Finland and Sweden suddenly gasped. "Vinland? As in the colony we founded originally?"

"Yup."

"Why haven't we met her before?"

"She hates Europeans." Canada deadpanned. "Especially France and England after they destroyed the tribes she was friends with."

"Claimed that they ruined us from being the proud warriors of North America that we were destined to be..."

"Well she did take it back after our Revolutions…sort of." Canada sniffed.

"Remember when she said if they went conquistador on us she was going to place a curse on them to make all their ships sink at sea?" America said with a snicker; ignoring their former guardians' paling faces.

"I thought she was going to make their countries fall into the sea?"

"That too."

"Are we done Germany?"

"Yes we are."

"Good, come on bro, I think our Viking helmets, and you war hammer is still in my office with my battle axe." America said speed walking to his office in the UN building.

"_Your_ what?"

* * *

Five minutes later

Several Nations were watching in awe as both the brothers attempted to fight Vinland in America's yard. Attempted; being the key word.

America had been right when he called her the Scary Valkyrie of North America.

Denmark was cheering as he and Japan recorded this epic Viking battle.

She was fast on her feet and able to hold both her brothers off holding only sword. America was swinging his axe with ease and struck at her while Canada got behind her to prevent a retreat. She just smirked and used America's momentum against him and sent him and Canada flying across the yard and into an oak tree.  
"Good work."

America and Canada just moaned as they sat up and took off their helmets. Their hair was matted with sweat. America grimaced as he touched a tender spot on his ribs where Canada's war hammer had hit him. Canada groaned as he touched where the axe handle had slammed into his collar bone.

"At least this time we're not bleeding." Canada muttered as Prussia helped him up.

"Now what?"

"Aspirin, ice, and a day off." America muttered as England got him get inside.

"DID YOU SEE THAT? SHE WAS LIKE- AND THEY WERE! OH MAN THAT WAS TOTALLY AWESOME!" Denmark screamed as he ran up to Vinland. "YOU DOLL ARE A REAL VIKING! WE SHOULD GO OUT SOMETIME!"

"No. I have my hands full enough making sure that my little brothers don't get attacked by Croatoan again. I don't have time for a loud mouth Viking beyond his years."

"I think that's the most I've ever heard her say in one sentence." Canada gasped.


	5. Vikings or Pirates?

Ch. 5 Vikings or Pirates?

9foxgrl

America loved the sea. Almost as much as he loved the sky. He though it was because he was raised by England, a former pirate. He always took part in the Revolution reenactment naval battles; heck he would have served in the Navy during WWII if he wasn't over ruled by his boss.

Canada loved the sea too. While France was not a big naval explorer like England and Spain; he thought it was due to his Viking heritage. His land may have been mostly mountainous, but he loved the sea and often went out sailing.

So one day during a lunch break at the monthly meeting the twins were having a conversation over who was better at naval battles; Vikings or Pirates?

"Vikings came first. They plundered and pillaged enemy villages-"

"So did pirates! At least a third of time they had approval of the state. Unlike vikings who set fire to the villages."

"I can't believe you're supporting what the English did to Spain! Maybe you are still his little colony, eh?"

It soon became a fully heated debated that resulted in blows that would have ended when they were pulled apart…had Denmark not opened his mouth.

"Vikings are better. They make pirates look like wimps."

Not even France and Romano could stop Spain and England from attacking him.

By the end they all agreed no more talk was allowed on the subject.

….

At least until the twins decided to debate Pirates vs. Ninjas.


	6. Culture Shock

Ch. 7 ~ Culture Shock

9foxgrl

**A/N: Translations down below!**

America walked into the meeting wearing a black sombrero, a blue yukata with a star pattern covered by a toga, and holding a frying pan, complete with clogs.

Canada face palmed. "Not again."

"Uh America?"

"HOLA HERMANO[1]!" American said shaking a pair of maracas and cymbals on his fingers. "COMO ESTAS [2]?"

Canada got up and hit him with a large cast iron skillet that he pulled out of his suitcase.

CRASH!

America stood back up rapidly. He was now wearing a Chinese shirt, over a kilt, over military pants, with the black hats that the Queen's guards wore complete with a scarf.

"К сожалению об этом. Я чувствую себя так жарко, прямо сейчас, но не беспокойтесь об этом, да?[3]" America said not noticing several Nations looking at him with worry while Russia seemed shocked.

"Brother…are you going through a culture shock again?" Canada asked.

"Yeah, weiß aber nicht darum kümmern [4]." America replied in German.

Canada sighed. "Go home and lay down. I'll be by later."

America frowned then nodded. "Va bene, lo farò. Prendere appunti per me fratellino. Ciao a tutti!"

Canada just sighed and took his seat. Seeing everyone staring at him he gave them an answer.

"Every so often his people will do a big culture celebration at his capital…and well he will start exhibiting their traits, clothing or using their language…don't get me started on the food."

"…You're kidding."

Canada raised a brow at his former caretakers. "Ever have Scones a la Orange with a mixed drink of sake flambe bratwurst and or a vodka and peppermint shake?"

* * *

Translations: **THANK YOU GOOGLE!**

1.**Hola hermano: **Hello brother [Spanish]

2.**Como estas? **: How are you? [Spanish]

3. **К сожалению об этом. Я чувствую себя так жарко, прямо сейчас, но не беспокойтесь об этом, да?****:** Sorry about that. I'm feeling so hot right now but don't worry about it, da? [Russian]

4. **Yeah, weiß aber nicht darum kümmern**: Yeah but don't worry about it. [German]

5. **Va bene, lo farò. Prendere appunti per me fratellino. Ciao a tutti**!: Alright, I will. Take notes for me little brother. Bye everyone! [Italian]


	7. Canada DID WHAT?

Ch. 7 Canada did What?

9foxgrl

"CANADA DID WHAT?"

"Is it really that unbelievable?"

"Yes!" several voices screamed at America as they watched the end of the video in disbelief.

America just shrugged and sat down. Taking the down the footage on his laptop.

Italy and Romano yelped as Canada walked in.

The Canadian look confused as to why so many of the large nations were looking him with a mix of fear, pride, and from Russia; respect.

"What's with them?" Canada asked his twin.

"Oh, I just show them that video footage I took of you wrestling that grizzly on our last camping trip."

"Oh…well why are they freaking out? It's no big deal. It's not like that time you were wrestling with crocodiles in the Bayou."

"Or when you were riding that angry moose."

"WHAT?


	8. Rise of the Mafia

Ch. 8 ~ Rise of the Mafia

9foxgrl

Canada kept shooting his brother worried glances during the meeting. Earlier he had been massaging his temples like he was trying to fight off a headache. Or it could be a hangover; he did get challenged by prussia to a drinking contest.

It was then that Canada noticed the dim murderous light in his brother's eyes.

Canada gulped. The last time this happened was during his brother's Prohibition Era…and that was something neither he nor Mexico wanted to experience again.

"HEY HAMBURGER BASTARD! QUIT SLEEPING YOU BAS-"

"**Shut Up**." replied a dark voice.

Canada and Mexico immediately fled to the opposite end of the meeting hall and hid behind Russia. Who was amused.

"Quit screaming. You're not King of the World." America said as he stood up glaring at Romano. "Stupid son of a b***."

"And if I don't?"

America just laughed and took out a gun from his jacket. "Well I'll just have to send you to sleep with the fishes wearing cement shoes."

"At least it's not my Mafia this time, da?" Russia laughed as America cackled.

It was agreed unanimously after that day that America was not allowed anywhere near the meetings when he had a headache or a hangover. No one wanted to see what would happen if the Russian Mafia side emerged.


	9. Shakespeare

Ch. 9 Shakespeare

9foxgrl

It was a little known hobby that America was a Shakespeare fan and would take part on occasion in performances at the Shakespeare Theater in Washington D.C.

One such performance of A Midsummer's Night Dream; fell on England's birthday so Canada brought him along as a surprise. Austria a few of the more sophisticated (aka well behaved) Nations came along as well after Canada managed to wrangled them a large box seats near the stage.

England was in awe and in tears as he watched his former colony act as Lysander.

"_Ay me! For aught that I could ever read,_

_Could ever hear by tale or history,_

_The course of true love never did run smooth;_

_But, either it was different in blood-"_

"I taught him so well." England cried at the end while everyone threw flowers onto the stage.

America was later mortified that they had attended; seen him in tights, and Japan had recorded the entire play. But seeing England congratulate him on his acting talents and bought tickets to his next week's performance of Romeo and Juliet.


	10. How To Train Your Dragon

Ch. 10 How to Train Your Dragon

9foxgrl

Based of the movie '**How to Train Your Dragon'**

"That movie was based on a real life event?" Finland yelled as the movie ended.

"Yup." America cheered. "Had to change the names so no one would know."

"It's true." Canada told Denmark.

"Oh so who was this Hiccup?"

"…You wouldn't believe me."

"Try me."

America and Canada simultaneously turned to look at Vinland who had been playing cards with Sweden and Norway during the movie. She looked up from her cards briefly to nod.

"You're kidding!"

"She was so nice when we were little." Canada sighed. "Used to take us flying."

"Good times." America sighed.

"So why haven't we seen a dragon?"

Vinland looked up and folded her cards. She walked to the window and whistled.

A black shadow dropped from the sky, skimmed the pond's surface then landed on Sweden's yard.

Finland fainted. Iceland and Greenland started to feel weak in the knees. Norway calmly took a picture. Denmark's jaw dropped as Vinland hopped out the window and went to go pet the large reptile that seem to purr like a kitten around her. Sweden soon joined her.

"Denmark; meet Vinland's Nightfury Starwave."

Denmark fainted.

"I think we broke him."


	11. Family Movies

Ch. 11 ~ **Family Movies**

9foxgrl

It was early December and a heavy snow storm had hit while the meeting was being held in Canada's home. The twins had gone upstairs to prepare the guest rooms leaving the Nations browsing Canada's media collection.

They had planned on watching a movie…until England discovered a collection of home movies labeled **'N.A. Twins Adventures!' **raging from different years.

They watched in shock as the Twins did different daredevil stunts that ranged from climbing Mt. Rushmore at night, dog racing in the Yukon against Vinland (who rarely appeared in any of the movies) sledding down steep mountains, river rafting, a mock Viking battle in the Canadian tundra, free climbing, hang gliding, and the latest was trying to surf a giant wave off the coast of Hawaii.

"I am giving him a talk later." France said as he nearly fainted from seeing his little Canada bungee jump off the Brooklyn Bridge in broad daylight. How did they pull that off without getting arrested?

"I can't believe they went over Niagara Falls in a canoe!" Switzerland gasped as England rewind the video again to see the twins just laughing as they plummeted over the edge.

"…Bloody Hell…"

"That looks like fun, mate!" Australia yelled.

"The teeth…" Austria and Germany gulped as they saw America wrestling a crocodile twice his size.

"Isn't Canada supposed to be the quiet one?" Prussia asked as they watched the 'quiet one' riding an Appalachian moose like a bucking bronco. Several Nations face faulted when Canada asked at the end for America to let him keep it.

"Apparently only in meetings and when America isn't around." Cuba deadpanned.

Mexico just sighed as she watched her crazy neighbors to the north try to outrun a stampede of wild horses on a small island. She had once seen them doing the same with a pack of hungry coyotes in the desert.

Lithuania shuddered as Italy found one that he had took when he unknowingly tagged along on a sky diving trip over the Grand Canyon. He could be heard screaming behind the camera while the Twins held on to him screaming things like 'ICE CREAM' and 'MAPLE LEAF' at the top of their lungs.

"Whose idea was that one Lithuania?" England asked.

"Canada's." the meek nation cried as his brothers, and to his shock, Belarus hugged him to give some comfort. "But I'm pretty sure going over Niagara Falls was America's idea."

"**We need to tie them to their beds." **France and England swore.

"Hey! I found another one!" Finland said uneasily as he put the video in.

It was blurry until they saw someone they did not expect fighting against Vinland with an sword with the twins cheering and screaming in the background. And actually doing a good job.

"Like Lithuania, W.T.F!" Poland screamed.

Estonia and Latvia jumped away from their brother in shock as they watched him disarm Vinland and pin her to the ground by practically sitting on her. Sweden looked at the Baltic with only a look that an angry father could give.

France was too much in shock from the previous videos to laugh perversely.

Russia wiped away a nonexistent tear. "He learns so well, da."

All the male Nations then winced in sympathy as Vinland kicked her opponent in his vital region to get him off her…then kick him again.

Seeing several curious stares Lithuania blushed. "America…said I needed a way to relieve some pent up rage…before I murdered someone in their sleep."

"Oh yeah, I remember that one! Big Sis was so happy she found a worthy opponent until you did that perverted move!" America laughed as he came down stairs.

"I'M NOT A PERVERT!"

America just kept laughing until England grabbed him and took him to another room to have a long talk about daredevil risks.


	12. Bad Influence

Ch. 12 Bad Influence

9foxgrl

"You know England is going to kill us for this right?"

"Yeah, so? He and France tried told our bosses what we did last summer, and now we have the CIA tracking us via satellite every time we go on a _vacation_." America snapped back making quote marks with his hands. "Besides, I got put in time out by England!"

"So? France gave me the Talk! The Talk! You know how traumatizing that is!"

"…You're right, and we're not on a vacation."

"Yeah, we're just visiting Sealand while on a diplomacy mission."

"An creating a bond with the micro-nation."

"Yup."

"So not a vacation."

"Hey! We're here!" Sealand cheered as he brought his country to a halt near the English Channel. "So what now Chaps? Are we going to piss off England?"

"Get the boat."

A few minutes later France and England got a call from Germany of seeing their boys plus Sealand doing choreographed water skiing in the Channel.

It later resulted in a high speed chase that would inspire the director of the next James Bond film.


	13. Experiments

Ch. 13 Experiments

9foxgrl

"America."

"Yes England?"

"What is that?"

"What?"

"That…thing on your head." Germany asked.

*chirp!*

"Oh it just my new pet Mochi; Liberty!" America cheered as he plucked the mochi off his head and stated to feed it lettuce from Tupperware in his suitcase.

*chirp!* the Mochi squeaked as it attacked a lettuce leaf twice it's size.

"Kawaii." Japan gasped as he took a picture.

Lichtenstein just stared at it whispering "So cute."

"Ve~! It's cute." Italy cheered.

"Where did it come from?"

"Brother decided to play with his chemistry set." Canada commented not even looking up from his book. "Last time he helped the scientist at Epcot create a tomato tree."

"WHAT?" Spain and Romano screamed.

America just grinned evilly.

"England and Vinland are the family magic nuts, I'm the animal whisperer…and America is our mad scientist." Canada muttered. "We're all just one psycho family."

A/N: Have you seen MochiAmerica? They're so cute


	14. Part-Time Jobs

Ch. 14 Part-time Jobs

9foxgrl

Canada found it amusing that he and his brother would often hide out among their people to try and get their standards up to what the other Nations had considered appropriate. They worked in different fields that would make other Nations look at them like they were crazy.

**1. Education**

Canada did this this more often then America. It wasn't that he was a better teacher, he could tolerate things better. He usually taught at primary schools while America specialized in high schools and universities since he had a wider range of knowledge and could teach anything.

Except for certain class; especially after America had spent an entire semester trying to teach students World History without breaking a globe over their skulls when they kept claiming that Europe was just a 'big ass' country and England was one of it's states. America actually considered invited the Allies and the Axis to his class to set the record straight.

But if one more kid had asked him if Iraq was in Antarctica he was going to loose it.

**2. Law Enforcement**

While Canada worked primary with the Mounted Patrols; America hopped around his various investigative branches to help improve the changes his boss was making. Those poor scumbags had no chance. Especially after his Russian Mafia side decided to surface when the Irish mafia kidnapped what they thought was a normal FBI agent…Those poor bastards surrendered immediately when the SWAT team arrived.

Whatever happened prevented Ireland from ever being able to look at him without crying or try to use England as a meat shield.

**3. Medical Field**

Who knows what they were thinking doing this. Being doctors, okay that was risky, but they pulled it off. Canada had just finished a year long job as a pediatrician in Quebec and as an on call surgeon. He still remembered all the lives he helped deliver into the world and those who he helped give a second chance at life.

**4. Emergency Response**

This is were America went during 9/11. Despite having a bleeding gut just barely held closed by some string he took from Lichtenstein; he ran to join his fellow Fire Fighters at the World Trade Center. All Canada and the others could do was watch in frozen stillness as he and his team risked their lives running into the buildings to save as many as they could before the towers collapse, pausing only to get a fresh oxygen tank.

Even then America did not stop trying to help those who were buried alive, even those already gone, until Vinland showed up out of nowhere and to everyone's shock; she showed emotions as she consoled her little brother when he broke down crying for all those he could not reach and the others who died at the Pentagon and in Pennsylvania. He cried for their families, and loved ones.

Yup the Twins were odd balls. But then again, that is what made them so unique.


	15. Are you Crazy?

Ch. 15 ~ Are you Crazy?

9foxgrl

"JAPAN!" two horrified Nations screamed as they ran into the Asian nation meeting ; ignoring China's loud protests as they ran him over.

"Yes?" the quiet nation asked.

"HAVE YOU GONE CRAZY?"

"OF COURSE HE HAS! OR AT LEAST THIS HIROMU ARAKAWA MUST BE!" Canada screamed as he clutched his head in fear and panic.

Japan blinked he was internally freaking out. "The manga?"

"NO THIS!" they screamed in unison as they shoved a manga book into his face, open to a particular page.

Oh! …Oh

"Kuso." Japan whispered as he looked at the drawing of the manga character.

"IS THAT ALL YOU CAN SAY?"

"ONE OF YOUR CITIZENS BASED A CHARACTER ON OUR SISTER!"

"Does she know?" Japan whispered.

"Not yet."

CRASH!

"She does now." Canada squeaked.

Japan made a mad dash for the window facing the garden just as a sword speared his chair.

"AIYAHH!"

A/n: Hero's high five to who can guess what FMA character they were referring to.


	16. Whose the Adult?

Ch. 16! Whose the Adult?

1700s

"YOU CAN'T SERVE THEM THIS FOOD!"

"YOU STUPID FROG! I BLOODY CAN!"

"IT WILL POISON THEM!"

Canada and America sighed as they watched their guardians fight.

"So what now?"

They climbed down from their chairs carefully as the two Nations tried to strangle each other.

"I can pull England off."

"I'll get France."

2012

"What you need England is to release some of that sexual tension."

"You bloody frog!" England roared before hitting the French nation with his file.

The scuffle quickly turned into a brawl.

Germany sighed. "This is getting annoying."

America sighed and gave him a pat on the shoulder. "We got it. Canada?"

"Got it."

The Twins waited a minute; then jumped into the scuffle and expertly dragged the two older nations apart with ease then sat them down on opposite sides of the table.

"Alright you two! Enough is enough, eh!" Canada snapped.

"This rivalry has gone one long enough! Over hundred plus years!"

"For maple's sake when we were colonies we were pulling you two apart!"

"I forgave Canada years ago for burning down the White House and shooting me in the head!"

"Really?"

"Yeah, don't push it." America replied." And even then we keep our fights in private!"

"Most of the time."

"If we can put aside our differences to work together so can you!"

"SO WHO IS THE ADULT HERE?" the twins screamed.

A/N: Like before; I am taking suggestions for one shots!


	17. CHIBI!

Ch. 17 Chibi!

9foxgrl

Inspired by **_osweetie246_**

"I hate you."

"Maple leaf…."

"Oh zip it, you two shouldn't have gone into my private room."

"YOU TOLD US TOO!"

_*Ding Dong!*_

"Ah, that must be England." Vinland said as she wrestled her brothers into the living room. "Now, he is going to watch you two - OUCH! AMERICA! NO BITING!"

"Brother! Stop! Maple…"

England stepped in a little nervous. Especially considering that Vinland of all people told him to quote: "Get your ass on the first plane to Newfoundland, Canada!". How did she get his home number anyway? Now he had arrived and was driven by chauffeur to a small cottage near the coast. It was simple; a fountain here, a small vegetable garden, and a stable nearby. She really was simple person...with a lot of shiny, pointy weapons.

When he approached the door he heard screaming.

"Come in! OW!"

England opened the door and gawked. He felt his heart stop for split second. There, struggling in Vinland's arms was America at the same height he was at when he had found him as a small colony. A pint sized Canada sat in a wicker chair looking at his brother and sister with amusement. Both of the shrunken nations were wearing a light blue nightgown like the ones they were found in.

"AMERICA STOP TRYING TO BITE ME! DO YOU WANT ME TO CHANGE YOU BACK TO NORMAL SIZE OR NOT?"

"YES! BUT I AM NOT WEARING A DRESS!"

"DEAL WITH IT SHORTY!"

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SHORT!" America screamed.

"But, we are short."

England coughed to get Vinland's attention.

"Good. You're here." Vinland huffed and shoved America into England's arms. "Watch these little devils while I find the potion to reverse this mess!"

England watched as she stormed off to her underground cellar then turned to look at America. The little nation blushed under his gaze.

"What?" he snapped puffing out his cheeks.

"SO CUTE!" England squealed as he hugged the chibi. He walked over to Canada and hugged him as well. '_MY WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED! THANK YOU DIVINE FORCES!'_

"England. Can you read us a story?" Canada asked with big puppy dog eyes.

"OKAY!" England cheered as he sat America down and started to skim the shelves for an appropriate story.

"Canada!"

"What? We're little, might as well enjoy it!" Canada said with a smile.

America shook his head. "And they say I'm the evil twin."


	18. Mad Scientist

Ch. 18 Mad Scientist

9foxgrl

Inspired by **91RedRose**

"Ve~! America, can you make me a mochi?" Italy asked he played with the living rice ball.

"Sure. I just need to get the ingredients."

"HURRAY!"

America pushed up his glasses creating a small glare. "I'm actually looking for help by next big experiment. You want to help?"

Canada paled and started to frantically signal the ditz Italian to not agree.

"OKAY!"

America just grinned and walked out.

"LOCK DOORS! BUILD A BARRICADE! DIG A HOLE!" Canada screamed as soon as the door closed. "Germany! You need to hide Italy right now! GET HIM OUT OF THE COUNTRY!"

"Ve~?"

"What?"

Canada was freaking out. "The last time I HELPED my brother with an experiment, I WAS THE EXPERIMENT! He tried to see if it was possible to use bio engineer animal DNA into humans! I ALMOST BECAME A BEAR HYBRID! And before that he wanted to creating a giant intelligent Venus flytrap! I'M MORE TERRIFIED RIGHT NOW OF HIM INSTEAD OF RUSSIA!"

"To be honest comrade, I'm scared too." Russia said with a shudder. "He almost made me his 'volunteer' during the Cold War...I cannot look at those fluffy Furby dolls the same anymore."

"Why is that, aru?"

"Where do you think the inspiration for that movie _Gremlins_ came from?"


	19. Operation Syrup pt 2

Ch. 19 Operation Syrup pt. 2

BANG!

BANG!

"WHO THE BLOODY HELL IS SHOOTING AT US?" England screamed as he took cover behind a large pine tree. Prussia just a beat behind him, Gilbird had decided to hid under the albino's hat instead of taking his chances flying around.

BANG!

"WHO KEEPS SHOOTING AT THE AWESOME ME?" Prussia screamed as he barely avoided the bullet that took out a chunk of three in front of him.

"COME OUT MAPLE THIEVES!" a cold deep voice yelled.

Rather than take their chances they two men rand further into the brush.

"Where the Hell is Canada?" England yelled as headed for the slope that headed back to the main road.

"Mein Gott!" Prussia screamed as he peeked over his shoulder and saw a man wearing red flannel hunting gear riding a very angry moose charging at them. "THIS IS NOT AWESOME!"

-Screech!-

England and Prussia found themselves saved by the arrived of an armored vehicle.

Germany shoved one of the doors open long enough for Japan and Russia to grab them.

"DRIVE AMERICA! DRIVE!"

"Hang tight dudes!" America yelled as he slammed down on the gas.

"That moose is not normal!" Japan yelled as the moose easily caught up with them.

"TSAR'S GHOST! GO FASTER COMRADE!" Russia yelled as the moose butted the door. Italy screamed and started waving his white flag frantically while Prussia tried to get behind Germany.

"I got it to the floor!" America snapped.

Suddenly America's cell went off.

"Can one of you dudes answer that! I'm kind of busy!"

Germany snagged the phone. "Hello?"

"_Hello this is Agent Fleur from the State Department, we need to speak to Mr. Alfred Jones and Mr. Matthew Williams about the maple shortage in Canada"_

"Hold on!" Germany yelled. He rolled down his window and hit the speaker button. "YER ON SPEAKER!"  
_"Mr. Jones, Mr. Williams. This is Agent Fleur; I'm just calling to tell you that were found the reason for the shortage! The Quebec providence police have found the 600 hundred barrels that were stolen."_

Suddenly Manada disappeared, leaving innocent Canada behind.

"Oh…Okay, Thank you."

America sighed in relief and stopped the car just as Canada brought the moose to a halt.

"Thanks for the ride Velta." Canada said as he dismounted. The moose snorted and headed back into woods.

"Mein Gott, it's over."

A/N: If you guys and girls look up **Police Seize More than 600 Barrels of Maples Syrup **online you'll find that's where I got the inspiration for this ending. And yes a crook really did steal 600 barrels of syrup from a plant in Quebec…Somewhere out there now, Manada is out hunting.

Is it strange that while writing this I swore I smelled maple syrup? *looks around


	20. Radar

Ch. 20 Radar

9foxgrl

After the incident with Italy and Romano's curls, Germany was slightly curious about America's and Canada's. He wondered if they were the same. He had seen China pulled S. Korea's when he got too rambunctious to handle, it made the nation get tired. Like someone had unplugged a lamp from the electric socket.

He asked England and France. Neither really knew and became curious as well.

1. Canada

This was a very bad idea. France had hoped it was his erogenous' zone and tugged it while Canada had been talking to Ukraine about her country's wildlife…

Only to be rewarded with Manada taking over his former charge and beat the living snot out of him.

So it was not an erogenous zone…but like the pin on a grenade. Pull it and something explodes.

Bad idea.

2. America

The Nation was a bit of an air head, but he would tactically deflect all attempts to touch it. Even with his back turned. They asked Prussia to do it, only to have him state no one could get near it without the Nation knowing.

"So could it be like Canada's?" Germany whispered to England as America did his presentation on global warming, and for once it did not involve giant superheroes.

England didn't reply, he was too busy staring at Nantucket that begun to subtlety spin atop America's head like a compass.

Germany followed his line of sight and stared as well. Soon the other nations, excluding Prussia, and Canada watched it spin.

"AND THAT'S HOW WE CAN DECREASE OUR CO2 EMISSIONS~!" America finished. He turned and saw them staring. "Err…guys?"

"America-san…your hair."

"Eh?"

"Why is it doing that?"

America tilted his head in confusion. "What?"

Prussia just laughed. "Mein Gott! They don't know?"

Canada just smirked. "Obviously Prussia. He did always wear a helmet or a hat in combat."

"WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?"

"You been you've wondered why he never once got hit in WW1 & II when he in the air? Or why any Navy ship he fought on could evade the enemy so well?"

"Come on little brother. Remember the Scarlet Eagle fighter pilot? None of your forces could hit him for a reason.

The more battle harden nations under stood the hidden meaning in Prussia's words. The others looked blank until Russia threw a pen at America's head when he turned around. Nantucket spun around rapidly, America then just leaned to the side and evaded the pen.

"You mean that's a-"

"Radar system? Yes, yes it is."

**Hey everyone, I'm going on vacation this weekend so I probably won't update until Monday afternoon. Send me your suggestions for one shots and I will get them up as soon as possible. Thanks! **


	21. Sunday Mornings

Ch. 21 Sunday Morning

9foxgrl

"Good morning!" Canada said cheerfully as England and America stepped into the kitchen; their hair still ruffled from sleep. America just grunted and went over to the pot of coffee and handed the the pot of hot water to England. Canada turned back to his large stove to flip the pancakes. "The Earl Grey is in the pantry England."

"How can you be happy this early in the morning?" England asked as he fixed his cup of tea.

"It's Canada, he lives for cooking breakfast in the morning." America said with a yawn as he started setting the table. "Will your normal Sunday guest be joining us bro?"

Canada looked out his window. "It looks like it."

America nodded and set a fourth place at the table. England raised a brow as America took out a bottle of vodka, some chopped fruit, and sour cream

"Who is-"

CRASH!

England jumped as the backdoor flew open.

"Good morning Russia." America said with a wave as the large nation hastily locked the door. "Coffee?"

"Belarus again?" Canada asked as he set a stack of pancakes on the table.

"Da. Thank you." Russia huffed as he took a large mug from America then sat down next to England who appeared in shock. "At least she was not in my closet or bathroom this time."

"Not the kitchen again?" Canada asked.

"Underneath the bed." Russia said with a shudder.

"Do I want to know?" England asked as America sat on his other side.

"About Belarus? No."

Russia shuddered again as a distant voice called out his name.

"Besides, this is a typical Sunday morning."


	22. Master Chef

Ch. 22 Master Chef

9foxgrl

It started when America invited members of the UN over to his house for dinner. The second he said that he was cooking a majority of nations declined, but Lithuania and Prussia agreed enthusiastically on the spot since both had eaten his cooking over the years.

"So what's on the menu?" Prussia asked with his mouth already drooling.

"Home cooked beef stew with a tossed mixed salad, and yeast rolls on the side." America said with a smile. "Vinland and Canada are coming to help me set things up so I can make dessert too!"

"YES!" Lithuania and Prussia screamed in unison, fisting the air. "BEEF STEW!"

"You have eaten his cooking before?" Estonia asked.

"I tasted his home cooking when I lived with him. I have never tasted such flavorful food in my life!" Lithuania said all watery eyed.

"So it's safe?" Latvia asked.  
"Safe and delicious!" his brother replied all starry eyed.

"That sound like it could be interesting, da?"

"So the food is safe?" Germany asked his brother.

"What that kid can do with every day food in a kitchen…it makes you want to cry." Prussia sobbed.

"It sound good right fratello?"

That night Prussia dragged Germany, both Italys, England, France, and Spain to America house with a spring in his step. Lithuania dragged the other Baltics and Russia. The two who had eaten America's cooking before were drooling as they opened the door and smelled the food.

Vinland stepped out from the dining room with a bottle of wine in her hands.

"Oh you made it."  
"The food is ready." Canada called out as he and America wheeled in cart with a large pot of stew, two bowls of salad, and a large bowl of warm rolls, from the kitchen.

"LET'S DIG IN!"

Lithuania, Canada, and Prussia moaned in contentment as they swallowed a spoonful making their friends look at them in curiosity. They all hesitantly took a bite as well and moaned as well; making America blush.

"This is amazing ve~!" Italy cheered before he started to devour his bowl. Lithuania was almost finished with his first and started using a roll to wipe up what remained in his bowl.

"There is plenty, so don't be afraid to ask for seconds." America said with a cheer as he served England, France, and Latvia some more as they raised their bowls.

A half hour later the pot of stew was emptied and America ducked back into the kitchen to get dessert.

"That was very good. I am surprised comrade knows how to cook so well."

Vinland just smiled. "You mean you all thought he ate nothing but fast food?"

Canada's snickering was all she needed to confirm it.

"Here's dessert!" America said cheerfully as he entered again. They thought they would see a plate of highly sugary, sweet foods, but were surprised instead see some fruit based desserts from their countries. Kissel*, blueberry crisps, clafouti*, erdbeeren elisabeth*, fresh pineapple compote, English plum pudding, Torta de almendra* just to name a few.

"MINE!" Prussia screamed as he swiped one of the cups of erdbeeren elisabeth as soon as America set the tray down.

"Yummy." Latvia said with a grin as he tried the English plum pudding.

"Glad you guys like it!"

"Incredible. It tastes just like the clafouti I make!" France cheered.

"I'm surprised that someone you raised can cook so well England." Spain said as wiped some crumbs from Romano's face.  
"You can't cook?" Vinland asked the blushing nation with curiosity.

"No." several said in unison.

Vinland threw England a look that made him wince. "Next Tuesday, I'll come over to your house and we can start your cooking lessons."

France laughed perversely.

"Anything you make that looks edible will be given to our test subjects."

"What test subjects?"

Vinland looked at her little brothers who paled.

"It's okay! If we could survive his cooking before, we can do it again!" the twins said in unison.

"And if they die we can use France."

A/N: Due the multiple diverse cultures in the U.S. several international cuisines have made their way here and changed over the years. Who says all we Americans eat is unhealthy?

**International desserts key**

Kissel: Russian apricot pudding

Blueberry crisps: a dessert favored in Canada

Clafouti: French baked cherry dessert

Erdbeeren elisabeth: German molded strawberry dessert

Fresh pineapple compote: a dessert enjoyed in Great Britain and Cambodia

Torta de almendra: orange-almond cake, a dessert from Spain, also enjoyed in Mexico.


	23. Thirsty Thursdays

Ch. 23 Thirsty Thursday

9foxgrl

Several members of the UN were shocked to see Canada walk in looking hung over with Prussia behind him. It was only Friday morning, they all usually went drinking in the afternoon.

"Ugh. My head. Not awesome."

"Maple leaf…" Canada groaned as he sat down. "We cannot go drinking at the same time again Gil."

"What the bloody hell happened to you two?" England exclaimed.

"Not so loud!" the two down Nations groaned.

"HEY EVERYONE! THE HERO HAS ARRIVED!"

"Shut up." Prussia groaned as he put his jacket over his head.

One look was them and remembering what day it was all America needed to figure out what happened.

"CANADA WHY THE HELL DID YOU TELL PRUSSIA ABOUT THIRSTY THURSDAYS? PLEASE DON'T TELL ME IT WAS YOU GUYS YOU STOLE THAT HORSE DRAWN CARRIAGE FROM CENTRAL PARK AND THEN LET THE HORSE FREE IN A FANCY RESTAURANT?"

"Okay, we won't."

America screamed.

A/N: Thirsty Thursday is what people on my college campus call Thursday nights when students go out drinking. By ten o'clock there is usually a check point near the campus and apartments.


	24. Chess

Ch. 24 Chess

9foxgrl

Chess is a game of tactics and strategy. It was so useful that former empires would have their generals use it as a way to sharpen their skills for battle. To be a great chess player you had to think several moves ahead of your opponent.

Many Nations knew this. That's why it was surprising when Russia challenged America to a chess game on the anniversary of the end of the Cold War.

"Like we used to play, da?"

They were surprised for several reasons.

_1. America agreed, and had a very calm look on his face._

_2. Canada screamed, ran out of the room, and returned wearing an army helmet. He was sitting in the corner behind a sandbag wall muttering about the 'Dark One' returning._

_3. Several of the Nations had been under the impression that America was an idiot for a long time, and believed that he would lose pretty fast._

The game started very quietly. Russia chose white (since America never made the first move in war; he liked his peace and tranquility thank you!).

The first moves were made in silence, neither side had lost a piece, until Russia decided to speak.

"You have improved Comarde." Russia said as he moved his knight.

"As have you." America said moving his pawn forward. "It's almost like old times."

Russia just smiled as he captured the first piece. "So it is."

By know some of the more curious Nations came up to watch. England frowned as America made what he thought was reckless moves, venturing further and further away from his king.

"They say that you can tell a good deal about a man by how he plays this game."

"Really?" America replied, quiet amused. "Then that would mean you are reckless and headstrong, _friend_."

Russia frowned as he saw what America was planning to do in order to expose his king. He moved his queen back. "I would say the same for you _comrade_, but there was always a reason behind your madness."

America lazy moved his far left knight away from Russia's obvious trap of a bishop and knight, and further behind the line of white pieces. "Oh really?"

"How else did you toppled the once great British Empire as a young colony?" Russia said with a smile, ignoring England growl of annoyance. "Check."

America smiled back. "True. But you know the old saying _Friend_. Check."

"What's that _Comrade_?" Russia asked as he took America's rook leaving the King only protected by one last rook and his bishop. One more move.

America smile vanished, a dark haunted look was in its place. "Never underestimate your opponent. No matter how dumb they may appear. Check mate."

The Nations who had been watching gasped.

Russia glared at the bored then toppled his king over. It was obvious who the victor was; as a majority of America's remaining pawns had surround him.

"So the pawn has once again trapped the king, da?"

America smirk said it all. "That was fun dude, we should play again sometime."

**A/N: Chess once a game to help train new military leaders in battle strategies. **


	25. Hey Flyboy!

Ch. 25 Hey Flyboy!

9foxgrl

**Inspired by _osweetie246 _- Sorry it took me awhile since your request, I had to brush up on my WWI history for this one.**

It was April 6, 1917, roughly three years after Canada had joined the Allies in WWI. He and his citizens had been fighting alongside the Allies against Germany. Canada being part of the air division, they had been shooting down German planes left and right, but it still wasn't enough.

Now, here he was on a secure Allies airstrip, waiting for the arrival of his brother.

When the war erupted in 1914 his brother America tried to stay out of Europe's war. He was trying to stay out of other Nation's problems, like his first president George Washington had wanted. Despite all the propaganda from both sides, the horror stories, and the political attempts to try and get America to join in the fight, he stayed stubborn and neutral. His people's only interactions with the foreign nations to that point had been in trade. America himself was under guard in his capital, and not allowed to speak to the other Nation representatives.

It probably would have continued had Germany's u-boats not sunk the Lusitanian and the Sussex at sea, not only killing over 120 American citizens, but violating their neutral rights at sea. The straw that broke the camel's back so to speak had been the attempt to get Japan and Mexico to attack America directly.

He had never seen America or his boss look so pissed off before.

Hearing the sound of airplanes approaching Canada joined in the cheering as the American fighter pilots arrived. In tandem they landed on the airstrip. Searching among the faces he smiled as he saw the last plane; the Scarlett Eagle, land and a dark blonde pilot jump out.

"It's about time you got here flyboy." Canada said with a smirk.

America just grinned. "Aww, just say it Mattie! You missed me!"

Canada smirked and playfully cuffed America on the head. "Oh can it Alfred."

"What are you doing here git?" England huffed as the brothers approached him.

America just smiled. "The Hero is here to chew gum, and kick German butt. But I'm all out of gum! So just point the way to the bastard and watch me give him nightmares with falling shells!"

* * *

A/N: When WWI broke out in 1914 America adopted a state of neutrality. Something that our 1st President George Washington advised on before leaving office. (Sorry George)

Yes both sides propositioned to America to join their side of the fight. The stories of trench battles and propaganda tried to levy Americans in favor of joining the war.

Had Germany's u-boats, and Zimmerman not attempted to destroy the nation we would have probably stayed that way until Germany threatened us with an invasion or threatened our neutral trade. It was then Woodrow Wilson pushed Congress for permission to declare war on the Germans.

Canada played a strong role in aerial battles in WWI. They had the army and navy too, but their fighter pilots were and still are top notch.


	26. One Word too Far

Ch. 26 One Word too Far

9foxgrl

**Inspired by 91RedRoses**

_Fat_

_Ugly_

_Pig_

_Fat ass_

He tried to appeal to them indirectly that he did eat healthy. Drinking only plain water, and eating only raw chopped vegetables and salad at lunch. But it didn't stop. Those words haunted America to the point the stopped eating the days of the Nations meetings. Even if he did eat anything he would immediately throw it back up the second he went in the restroom. It didn't matter that he barely had an once of fat on him, it had become a game so to speak with the other Nations.

_Hey Fat ass, it's your turn._

_Watch out, the wide load is coming. _

_Hey fatty, how many burgers are you going to eat today?_

Those words hurt. Like a knife stabbing him in the back, carving each insult into his skin. After nearly a year of nonstop verbal abuse America would barely eat at all, not even at home.

* * *

His boss started to notice how thin the Nation was becoming at an alarming pace and became worried after he nearly fainted at a State function. He contacted Canada about it who also shared his concerns. America was stubborn about letting anyone see his weakness. He had seen America's torso the day before in their shared hotel room. He was literally able to count his ribs through the nations white tank top.

Canada tried to go visit to his brother, but he was swamped with work and would not see him until the meeting in D.C. that weekend. Unable to see another option he called Vinland.

* * *

Vinland was worried about what Canada had told her. She was always so busy _monster _hunting that she didn't noticed the pain her little brother was in. After slaying the last _creature _she was fighting she took off to her brother's house.

Upon arriving the door was immediately opened by Tony the Alien, one of the few non-human creatures on Earth that Vinland tolerated.

"Where is he?"

"Upstairs…it's getting bad. He refuses to eat much, and throws it all back up right after."

Vinland raced upstairs and found America hunched over the toilet, he had just finished throwing up the food Tony had made for him. She paled at how frail and thin he had become in the last months she had seen him.

"Alfred…" She gasped using his human name.

He looked up at her. She never used their human names unless she was emotionally distraught.

"Astrid? Am I skinny enough now? Will they stop making fun of me now?"

Vinland hugged him as he started to cry.

* * *

Canada was silently frantic when America didn't show up for the meeting that he was supposed to be hosting. Instead Vinland was there in his place looking as cold as ever sitting at the head chair.

"My brother is unable to attend so I am here in his place until further notice." she said as Germany took the roll.

"The fat ass is probably off eating or something." one nation muttered. The nations next to him snickered.

CRASH!

The nations jumped as the battle axe they had often seen America swing around during his fights with Vinland, and the pike end of a war hammer, crashed into the wall behind the ones who had snickered. As one they all looked at Vinland who was pissed and had a black aura of doom surrounding her.

"The next person…who dares insult my brother…_either one _of them…will have the choice of facing me one on one in the arena or being cursed to have every insult you utter carve itself into your flesh for fifty years." she hissed.

The nation who had insulted America snorted. "Yeah right bitch."

Vinland snapped her fingers. The offending nation then screamed as the words bitch painfully carved itself into his arm and healed over, leaving the word behind as a faint scar.

"Anyone else?" Vinland asked.

After no one spoke she stood up and got the meeting started. "The presentation I am showing will be on a serious issue going on in society that has been ignored for far too long. It has already caused the deaths of many across the world."

The attending G8 looked at each other with concern. What critical issue could they have ignored?

"What issue, Aru?"

Vinland clicked to start the power point. "Bullying."

* * *

By the end of the meeting all the nations who had teased America about his weight, even those who allowed it to happen right in front of them, realized in horror how far they had driven the man to wanting to kill himself. The extra detailed slides on eating disorders such as anorexia triggered by verbal abuse, one featuring a picture of a teenager who looked like a survivor of the Holocaust in the hospital, drove the last nail through. In order to make sure they understood the pain that they had caused she place a light version of her curse on all of them before the meeting was dismissed. While it would not carve their words into their flesh it would make them experience all the emotional pain they were causing.

* * *

"I wish you would let me at least hurt some of them Astrid, at least spill their blood a bit."

"Matthew, attacking them would only put you on their level, and triggering a war is not something that needs to go on right now. Alfred is going to need us as support right now, we need to be there for him." Astrid replied. "I'll be taking sometime off to stay with him and make sure he starts to eat properly again."

Matthew sighed. "You're right."

"After he gets better, then you can kick their asses."

* * *

*Vinland's human name is **Astrid **(divine beauty) **Hedvig **(contending battle). She a supernatural hunter (one of the reasons America has that show).

Bullying is a big issue in many countries. It doesn't have to leave behind bruises to be called bullying.


	27. Coming Home

Ch 27 Coming Home

9foxgrl

- sequel to _A Word Too Far_

It had been several months since any nation had seen America. Vinland had attended the meetings in his place. Both she and Canada refused to mention their brother's condition to anyone and denied visits just in case some one accidentally triggered a relapse.

Now it was nearly July; and the G8 meeting was being held in D.C again. They all walked into the room expecting to see Vinland at the podium…only to be shocked to see America standing there instead setting up a power point.

"AMERICA!" Italy screamed as he ran up to hug the nation.

America barely managed to stop the hyperactive nation from tackling him head on.

"WHOA! Easy Italy, I may be here, but I'm not up to your full power hugs yet!" America said with a laugh.

England took in America's physical appearance. He was still a little pale, and by the look of it he had only a thin layer of muscle under his skin. (What he didn't know was that his suit jacket had some padding underneath to hid his still visible ribs). At least he did not look like a walking skeleton.

"Welcome back America." England said with a smile.

"It's good to see you again comrade."

"Don't worry us like that again, aru!"

America grinned. "Thanks, now let's get started!


	28. Party Time!

Ch. 28 Party Time~!

9f0xgrl

_A/n: It had to be done _

"Costume?"

"Nah, no time. Its got to be something we can do to get rid off all these glow sticks and rubber boots."

America and Canada sighed.

"I got no idea."

"Disco? You still have stuff from that era."

"Yeah, but I want it more modern."

"I'm out of ideas."

America growled. "Alright…let me channel my people and see if they got any ideas."

"Okay."

_-Five minutes later-_

"Canada?"

"Yes Italy?"

"Is America okay?" Italy asked pointing to America who appeared to be zoned out and starring at the ceiling.

"Oh, he's just channeling his people for ideas."

"What, why?"

"An old friend of his closed his business a week ago and left him several boxes of glow sticks and rubber boots so we trying to see if we can use them for a party or something."

"Ve~?"

"I GOT IT!" America screamed. "My people are genius!"

"What?"

"GERMAN SPARKLE PARTY!"

_-Ten minutes later-_

When the nations returned from lunch they did not expect to see their meeting hall dark, barely illuminated by a variety of glow sticks. The second Germany stepped in music started blaring. In the ceiling there was a disco ball and several multicolored strobe lights illuminating the room.

America and Canada were wearing blue and red glow sticks and dancing by the speakers set up on the table.

"WHAT IS GOING ON?" Germany yelled.

"_I LIKE GERMAN SPARKLE PARTY!"_

Italy danced up to them covered in red and green glow sticks and dancing. "Ve~! Come join the party Germany!"

"_HARD CORE DANCE!"_

"_HARD CORE DANCE!"_

"_HARD CORE DANCE!"_

"Mein Gott." Germany cursed before he was dragged onto the dance floor.

"WE GOT BOOZE!" America yelled to the other nations.

"Bloody git, cannot be serious." England hissed to Austria…only to see the stuffy man dancing. The song apparently affected anyone with German blood.

England twitched and turned to leave, only to have America lasso him and drag him onto the table to dance.

"_GERMAN SPARKLE PARTY!"_

They may have not gotten anything done that day, but at least they all had fun.

The look on everyone's face when America told them all those decorations and speakers were from his rave period. Priceless.


	29. Hazards of Drinking

Ch. 29 Hazards of Drinking

9foxgrl

As many can tell you that a drunk nation can be down right terrifying or down right hilarious. It depended on how much they had to drink, or in England's case what they drank.

No one ever allowed England to drink a large amount of rum near Spain again after his pirate side made a comeback. Especially after Japan somehow drank too much sake and went into ninja mode. It was the unofficial WWIII; Pirate v. Ninja.

For the briefest of moments all the other nations united under one banner to stop them.

* * *

America they found was a smart drunk. He made the impossible, possible. Even after got arrested for disorderly conduct in New York, he managed to escape jail, get all the way down to Florida and sneak aboard a shuttle heading to the space station with supplies. It wasn't until Russia received a message from one of his cosmonauts did they find out. Not only had he re-calibrated their engines to maximum efficiency and debugged the system that had been giving the astronauts problems in the past week, but he had created a new wing by salvaging spar parts that past them in orbit. And all that was before he passed out.

On his back the director of NASA just laughed and told the nation that was fifth time he had done it.

* * *

Canada was a bit of a wild card when he was drunk. He could be violent or just plain crazy. Prussia had seen the crazy side when they went drinking on Thursday night and ran into some guys from a college fraternity that was on spring break. In just eight hours they stole a horse and buggy, drove it through down town, lost the horse somewhere in the district full of restaurants. But the coup de grace had to have been the rave he caused in Times Square that ended up being television across the world.

America was seriously not happy about this. Mostly because the rave left him with a bad headache and several hundred of dollars in property damages.


	30. Supernatural

Ch. 29 ~ Supernatural

9foxgrl

America was scared of ghosts. Well, not ghosts in general, but of the supernatural. The creatures that go bump in the night. He had seen first hands what some of those creatures could do.

Particularly a shape shifter name Croatoan.

This was before Vinland let him get close to the Europeans. Under the disguise of a friendly Native American family he and Canada would play with the colonist children while Vinland (disguised as a boy) did some trading or taught them local herbal remedies.

It was all going so great, until that night.

A creature, no…a shape shifter entered the settlement, having followed the last ship that came from Europe. It had disguised it's self as one of the Roanoke colonists and began a massacre.

Vinland and the neighboring tribes arrived in time to see much of the settlement a blazed and that creature about to kill her brothers and a little girl named Virginia they were trying to protect. The medicine men who had rode with her managed to banish it.

While the natives escorted the survivors back to their village Vinland carved a message to the Europeans onto the tree before following. The three immortal children would spend the rest of the year learning spirit magic from the elders so that next time…they could fight.

Since that terrible night America hated to sight of spirits. Just walking into the old settlement site brought him nightmares.

He never told England he could see his magical friends because it would probably make him a target as well.

Canada, who seldom spoke at the meetings, would use the time to practice his magic by manifesting his spirit animal Kumajiro otherwise known as Nanuq the Great Bear Spirit or turning invisible for long periods of time.

America would study everything he could about the supernatural around the world. Whenever they had some leisure time he would go to the nearest bookstore or library to do some research. He did practiced with his spirit animal Manabozho, the Great Rabbit spirit who was a trickster on creating traps and such.

Vinland put the most dedication into their hunt for Croatoan. As she was not an official Nation she had more freedom and would got hunting across North America and occasionally oversees. She too had a spirit animal; Shunkaha the Great Wolf who was often her hunting partner.

They were all training, and waiting for the creature to make a comeback. Destroying it would be the ultimate revenge.


	31. Devilish Plots

Ch. 31 Devilish Plots

9foxgrl

Features human names!

Astrid was rubbing her temples as she listened to her brothers squabble. Just one night she would like for them to have a family dinner with no fighting.

Was that too much to ask?

"At least I didn't direct a porn film!"

Apparently yes.

"It was not porn! And you have no room to talk! You were a male stripper in New York for a week!" Matt screamed. "DO YOU KNOW HOW BAD ARTHUR FREAKED WHEN HE SAW YOU?"

"Before or after I gave him that lap dance?" Alfred said with a devilish purr.

Astrid blanched. Wait. What? No. There were just some things that she did not need to know.

'_I need a drink.'_

Why the Hell was there no alcohol in her house?

Oh yeah, last time she drank too much she beat the Hell out of the Bad Touch Trio then punted them across the ocean.

"Besides you're just jealous that I got the body for it!"

"What body? You don't have it where it counts."

"Oh you did not just go there!"

"Bitch! I live there!"

Astrid had enough and went to make a phone call.

"_Алло__?__"_

"Ivan, it's Astrid."

"_Hello Astrid, are you calling to challenge me to another fight?"_

"No, I not calling to fight. Are you in town?"

"_Da. I leave tomorrow afternoon." _

"Good, do you want to get some vodka?"

"_This is unexpected. Are you trying to become one with me?"_

Astrid rolled her eyes. "No, I just need someone to keep me from starting another brawl after I have one shot too many."

"_Alright, meet you in a half hour, da?"_

"See you then." Astrid replied hanging up. "BOYS! I'M HEADING OUT, TRY NOT TO KILL EACH OTHER!"

In the kitchen Alfred and Matt were crouching at the door, having listened in their sister's phone call.

"It worked!" Alfred said with a snicker.

"How long until she realizes that we are trying to set her up?"

"Never I hope, she'll kill us."

"But…why Ivan? Don't you hate him?"

Alfred just smirked. "Who else is going to be able to stand up to her when she gets mad? Romano?"

"Good point…I hope Berwald and Tino don't find out first."


	32. Like A Boss!

Ch. 32 Like A Boss

9foxgrl

a/N: I'm going to be using their human names from here out. It will make it a bit easier for me.

"This is the craziest idea yet Alfred! And this coming from the guy who is nicknamed Crazy Bear!"

"No one calls you that Mattie."

"The Baltics do."

"That's because you took Raivis sky diving over Siberia…and you invited Peter to boot!"

"Don't sass me!" Matthew snapped. "I had enough of that from Arthur and Berwald! Not to mention Eduard and for some reason Ivan. So don't make shank you!"

Alfred sweat dropped. "I am never leaving you alone in New Jersey again. And besides, I'm still going to do it!"

"Sweet Maple Syrup."

Later that meeting Alfred waited until Francis and Arthur started arguing before taking a digital camera out of his suitcase. He waited until Arthur decked Francis before snapping a picture and proclaimed "LIKE A BOSS!" at the top of his lungs then fled out of the meeting hall.

Matthew sighed in frustration. "I blame you for his behavior Arthur."

"What?"

"Well he didn't act like that when we were little when ASTRID raised us along with the tribes! So he had to have learned it from you!"

Arthur growled. "I never taught that wanker to act like that!"

Matthew just huffed. "Oh and I just bet that he learn how to strip tease and pole dance from you too."

"WHAT?" Arthur screamed.

"Well he did see you working in that naked waiter café…and I think got some inspiration for his little number. He was popular on ladies nights and vice versa." Matthew continued until Arthur was as red as a tomato.

Elizabeta and Kiku passed out from massive nose bleeds. Vash and Tino covered the ears of the younger nations. Ivan was about to hit himself over the head with his pipe but decided to leave and wash away his memory with vodka.

Francis regain conscious to laugh perversely before fainting again.

"Ve~? What's strip dance Ludwig?"

"NOTHING!" Ludwig and Lovino yelled.

"Kesekese!" Gilbert laughed. "I knew you weren't so innocent Artie! Birdie just smacked your pride-"

"LIKE A BOSS!"

"YOU'RE STILL HERE?"


	33. Wendigo pt 1

Ch. 33 Wendigo - pt. 1

9foxgrl

_Inspired by 91RedRoses_

* * *

A private retreat for the G8 plus Canada who was serving as the mediator.

A way to solve their problems and build teamwork over two days in the secluded wilderness.

For Alfred it spelled nightmares. Especially considering he was forced to host it in northern Michigan right near the end of autumn. Something about the perfect spot the politicians said.

Yeah right.

When **they **were running around trying to get that last bit of food before hibernating. Those man eating bastards that were as old as him. Creatures that lived off bloodlust and greed.

And nine nations nearby.

Nine bloodstained nations who had fought in several wars and argued a good deal over money.

Right near the territory where those…**things**…liked to hunt before winter started.

…

Fuck.

_-December 11__th__-_

Alfred ran up to the cabin he had specifically chosen since he and Matt had built it in the shape of a circle, and started to create a large circle of Anasazi symbols on the edge of the property line under plants and stones. He repeated the process inside in the main room and the loft. He had nearly been finished when he got a call from the White House. In his absence he failed to notice a stray dog dig up some of the stones near the woods.

_-December 19__th__-_

Alfred drove his truck up to the cabin with a great deal of nervous tension. Arthur was in the passenger seat with Francis and, Ivan, and Yao in the backseat. Matt was behind him with Ludwig, Feliciano, and Kiku in his car. He was mentally checking his list; guns, flares, salt, holy water, devil's traps drawn in the basement and under the beds _*just in case_*, the circle was complete on the property outskirts, plus there was the one that he and Matt had carved into the foundation of the cabin when they built so they had that at least.

Arthur obviously noticed the young nations nervous behavior.

"Is something wrong?"

"N-no…I just don't like being up here this time of year." Alfred said distantly.

"Why is that Alfred?" Yao asked. Alfred didn't answer, and instead turned into the partially obscured driveway to the cabin. A movement in the brush caught his attention.

'_Only two days until they fall asleep for the winter…Just two days...'_

"Alfred?"

Alfred stopped the car and waited for Matt and the others to do the same. Seeing movement in the woods he and his brother shared a haunted look.

"Listen up, this is there is a number one rule you **have **to follow while we are here no matter what. **Do Not Go Outside Alone. **Especially at night, and especially into the woods or off the property. If you hear a voice calling you from the woods, get in the fucking cabin right away! If you have to in the woods for what ever damn reason, you go in teams of three **ARMED **with one of the rifles already loaded in the main room, and an emergency kit each, **NO MATTER WHAT! **I do not want to explain to your bosses why you got eaten alive." Alfred snapped.

The visiting nation, minus Matt paled.

"As long as you stay on the property or in the cabin you will be safe." Alfred said before unlocking the cabin.

"What the bloody Hell is in those woods?" Arthur gasped.

"Arthur, the less you know…the better you will sleep at night." Matt replied coldly.


	34. Wendigo pt 2

Ch. 34 Wendigo pt. 2

9foxgrl

The nations couldn't help but gawk at how elaborate the cabin was. Everything was decorated with warm red, green, and blue fabric and draperies. The main center room was bare except for two sofas, a fire place in the center that was connected to a chimney leading upstairs to the second floor were the bedrooms were and a ladder connected to a small stand on the roof.

On the left was a staircase that spiraled up to the second floor, on the right was a door leading to the kitchen, and on the opposite side were two doors, one leading to a small study lined with books and Native American artwork, the other lead down to the basement.

It would have looked so cozy…were it not for the numerous glass shelves filled with hunting rifles, and the deadbolts on the windows..

"What is this place?" Ludwig asked in shock.

Ivan was eyeing the guns with such curiosity that it made Yao and Francis nervous.

"A cabin we made during the pioneer days." Matt said he tossed the bags up to Alfred who was on the second floor. "Astrid used to take us hunting out here when we were nomads and traveled around with the other tribes."

"Savages." Arthur muttered.

"HEY! Those savages taught us how to survive!" Alfred snapped. "Hell they saved our necks in Roanoke when that _**thing **_tried to-"

"ALFRED!" Matt snapped and tossed a bag directly his brother's head to shut him up. "They **don't' need **to know."

Alfred glared at his brother then went outside to collect some fire wood from the stack, grabbing a rifle on his way to the door. They jumped as he slammed the door.

"What happened at Roanoke?" Arthur gasped. For years he wondered what happened to his first settlement.

A haunted look crossed Matt's face.

"You **don't **want to know." Matt replied then retreated to the kitchen to start a late lunch.

Francis and Arthur exchanged a look. Something was going on.

"Ve~! They look so cute!"

"Huh?"

The Nations crowded around Feliciano who found two old paintings hidden behind a drape in the study. One was of a preteen Astrid smiling shyly with cropped hair; wearing a faded white gown under an animal skin cloak sitting under a tree. In her lap were little Alfred and Matt dressed the same way, each one was holding onto her cloak, and looking up to her with huge curious eyes.

The second painting was of a nature glen with the three again, but this time a dusty brown and white rabbit was in a grinning Alfred's arms, Matt was smiling and crouching next to a large white bear, while a sleek grey wolf stood next to a confident looking Astrid.

"Incredible!"

"Kawaii."

"These paintings are old, da." Ivan said looking at the cute young Astrid.

"That's can't be, aru."

"1621 and 1622."

"Eh?"

"That's the dates on the painting." Feliciano said pointing at the corners.

"These were made after Jamestown was established." Arthur gawked.

"So that means…"

"These were commissioned when they were children." Francis said.

Kiku tilted his head as he saw a something hidden behind the newer painting. He carefully pushed it aside revealing a hidden bookcase filled with homemade journals bound by leather straps and yellowed paper.

"What is this?"

Yao took one of the books open and looked confused.

"This looks like one of your books, aru." Yao said handing the book to the Arthur who paled at the drawings of several magic circles and the description of their uses.

"Arthur?"

"These are used to trap or banish demons." Arthur said in a hollow voice.

They all took a book and skimmed through. Yao paled at the mentions of vampire in different settlements, including a coven that had lived in secret among some from his country in California, including mention of a demon that some immigrant workers accidentally released from a mine*. Kiku nearly cried when he found a charcoal drawing of faceless man with spider like limbs dragging children into the woods.

Ivan was silently shaking as he found a recent entry of a baba yaga that Astrid had come across while traveling in Alaska near the Aleutian Islands. It took the help of a shaman just to take it down.

"What the bloody Hell are these?"

"Mon ami…I think this is why Alfred and Mathieu are acting the way they are." Francis said in a shaky voice.

"So this is the reason bruder told me to always place a piece of silver under my pillow as a child.*" Ludwig said in a terrified voice as he found a page on curses and spirits causing plagues on families.

"I will never make fun of fratello's need to have holy water in the house ever again!" Feliciano whimpered into Ludwig's sleeve.

"I told you, you didn't want to know."

They all screamed as Matt came back in holding a tray of hot tea. He looked at them all sadly before taking all the journals and hiding them behind the painting again.

"Mathieu…please tell me that those are all fake."

Matt shook his head. "Sorry, but I can't."

"Can't what?"

The nations screamed again as Alfred entered holding a large stack of wood.

"They read our hunting journals." Matt explained.

Alfred sighed. "Well, I guess we can tell you now that we have always been able to see you magical friends Arthur. Although the fairies just look like orbs of light to us."

"And before you try to deny it Francis, Flying Mint Bunny real." Matt added. To prove his point the handed Francis a black and white photo that he had taken with a special camera at the last meeting. There in Arthur's arms was a nearly transparent form was Flying Mint Bunny.

"Nani?"

"I TOLD YOU!"

"Alfred...is that thing...in the woods…something what's in these books?"

Before Alfred could answer they heard a female voice scream "HELP ME!"

Matt and Alfred quickly grabbed a rifle and one of the emergency packs by the door.

"STAY INSIDE!"

**To Be Continued…**

* * *

**A/n: Not 100% accurate on this, but according to Google Vinland's flag looks like Finland's but in green and black. Hence her signature color is green. **

*** Based off the Stephen King book **_Desperation _

*** There is a German superstition that having a piece of silver under your pillow while you sleep at night will protect you from witches and curses.**


	35. We Shall Not

Ch. 35 We Shall Not…

9foxgrl

A little break for a laugh!

**Considering our dangerous actions on certain occasions I Alfred F. Jones and I Mathew Williams do here by agree not to:**

**1. Encourage my brother's crazy schemes or encourage other people to join us.**

M: _Arthur still can't believe we were the ones who convinced the Queen to jump out of the helicopter during the Olympics opening ceremony. _

_ A: Nor were the Nordics when I told may have indirectly told my brother that no one has ever bungee jumped off the Empire State building and we decided to take Peter with us. _

**2. Hang out with Feliciano Vargas outside of meetings.**

_Dude come on! Those animals were begging us to release them from the zoo! Plus that tricked out gondola was epic!_

**3. Borrow Tony's ship and go on an intergalactic road trip without telling anyone.**

_ We stayed in the Solar System! Look Iggy! I got you a moon rock!_

**4. Attempt and succeed in recreating the time machine from Back to the Future**

_You're just made that we got to see Atlantis before it sank, eh!_

**5. Try to create life.**

_My plant was not a monstrosity! And Fiona is famous for her role in Little Shop of Horrors! She even won an Emmy for her performance!_

**6. Kidnap General Winter so we can have a third member for poker night.**

_I said I was sorry Ivan! How long before you let it go, eh?_

**7. Pose for Elizabeta and Kiku's art club.**

_Dudes, we didn't do anything, and besides we were wearing briefs and bunny ears! You saw the sketches!_

**8. Hide all of Roderich's musical instruments.**

_This one we are doing of our own free will._

_ He is scary without music, eh?_

**9. Start random concerts in the capital cities of countries we are visiting. With Prussia being the only exception if we agree to do Disco Pogo next time.**

**10. Revert Arthur back into his punk state to go to concerts with us.**

_Oh come on! That was fun! I bet you still have that autographed poster from the American Rejects!_

**By our signature on this document we agree to obey these restrictions.**

….

**Yeah right.**


	36. Wendigo pt 3

Ch. 36 ~ Wendigo pt. 3

9foxgrl

"Are you sure that it's a wendigo and not a skin walker?" Matt asked as he and Alfred raced towards the woods. "Because if it is then these bullets won't do us much good."

"Since when can skin walkers imitate a human voice? Relax, these are specially made bullets with silver nitrate cores. It should still weaken it in the least." Alfred replied before jumping over the circle's edge.

Only for both of them to be hit simultaneously with the force of car and into a boulder once they passed the tree line. Their rifles falling out of reach. Normally this could knock a normal human unconscious, but since they were nations it just knocked the wind out of them.

"MAPLE!"

Alfred grabbed one of the creature's arms and slammed it into a tree. He grabbed his rifle and a flare gun from his bag and shot the creature that had tackled him with both. He then turned and shot the one trying to drag Matt into the woods. "FUCK!"

Matt yanked an emergency flare out of his bag and shot at the wendigo, he grimaced as he heard its inhuman screams.

"What the fuck?" Matt gasped. "No wendigo has ever teamed up like that!"

"There were two…they aren't supposed to hunt in packs!"

"Well these are." Matt gasped.

Inhuman screams heading their way cut them off.

"Please tell me I did hear more."

"Dude…"

The seven blurs shot towards them. Before the twins could even raise their rifles the blurs were hit with several simultaneous rounds and ran back into the woods.

The twins immediately ran back towards the safety of the circle at the cabin. They were shocked when they cleared the tree line that they were grabbed yet again, but more gently this time.

Alfred knew he was safe when he was pulled into a tight hug by Arthur.

"Are you alright poppet?" Arthur asked in a shaky voice.

Alfred blushed; he could see Matt in the corner of his eye trying to get Francis to stop babbling in French while Feliciano hugged him. Ludwig, Ivan, Yao, and Kiku stood to the side holding a rifle each. Ludwig and Ivan were still throwing a nervous glance towards the woods, searching for movement.

"I'm fine. Can you let go, so I can breathe?"

"Let's get inside first." Matt added.

Once they entered the cabin the twins were shuffled to one of the sofa and had a blanket draped on them.

"Okay, someone please explain what the Hell just happened?"

"Starting with who taught Feli how to shoot a gun so well." Matt stated.

All eyes turned to Feliciano, still holding his gun, properly. The ditzy Italian blushed.

"Ludwig and Fratello taught me…" he muttered.

"Back on topic. Mathieu, what was were those…creatures?"

The twins exchanged a look then sighed. Alfred got up and grabbed one of the hidden journals.

"Those things were Wendigos. According to the Algonquian tribe they were once humans who survived a harsh winter by feasting on the flesh of their tribes or family. Their cannibalism eventually turned them into monsters." Alfred explained showing them the journal with an entry from their first encounter with the beasts along with the advice the elders had given them on how to fight.

"They are incredible hunters, especially at night. They have inhuman speed, strength, and are able to imitate a human's voice." Matt added. "Fire can kill them, and silver is capable of weakening them, but normal guns and knives won't."

"Then how did these work?" Ludwig asked pointing towards the rifles they had used.

Alfred just smirked and took a bullet from a box. Using a pocket knife he managed to pry the cap open, revealing a silver liquid center.

"These bullets have a silver nitrate core in them. I made them originally to deal with werewolves."

"So how long will those be out there?"

"Just two more days. Once the first day of winter comes they go back in to their hibernation." Alfred replied.

"Hold on. If you knew these things were roaming around, hold the meeting here in the first place?" Ludwig asked.

Alfred raised a brow. "Unless they have had experience with the supernatural; who in their right minds would believe me?"

"…"

"You have a point, aru."

"Besides. It's just two days. We have enough supplies and the circle. We can make it."

The cabin shook slightly as there were several loud roars from the woods. Feliciano screamed and jumped onto Ludwig.

Ivan and Yao raised their respected pipe and wok in preparedness to fight.

"Chillax dudes." Alfred sighed. "Even if those things break the circle outside there's a second one inside the cabin. So don't worry!"

Matt said something in French that made Francis scold him for using such language.

"What worries me is that hunting in a pack." Matt groaned.

"I take it that's unusual comrade?"

"Considering how they come to existence, wendigos aren't exactly social. But for there to be so many in just one area is bad." Alfred replied. "Normally we'd call Astrid for back up on something like this..."

"-But she's went to Kansas to help some Hunters* kill a demon that's been possessing mothers and making them kill their children." Matt finished. "I doubt she will want to leave that job for this."

"I'm going to take a shower then snooze." Alfred said heading upstairs. "Wake me up at eight Mattie!"

"Okay."

"How can he be so bloody calm?" Arthur yelled.

"Because; if we freak out it will do us no good." Matt replied. "Besides, he just volunteered to take first watch. That stand on the roof isn't there for decoration, eh."

"THOSE THINGS WILL ATTACK AGAIN?" they all screamed.

Matt just grinned and went to check on the soup he had left simmering. "Why yes. Nine bloodstained nations is a hard thing for them to resist."

_'I'm keeping one of these guns by my bed tonight.'_ the Nations all thought.

"So whose hungry?"

*** High five if you can correctly guess who these Hunters are! And no this is not based off an episode...that I know of.**


	37. Ultimate Fights

Ch. 37 Ultimate Fights

9foxgrl

There is an old saying near the US-Canadian border; there is nothing more epic than and seeing a Brooklyn Rage v. Hockey Rage fight.

It's rumored to be even cooler than a bar fight between an Irishmen and a Scotsman.

The twins were accidentally the ones responsible for this epic showdown.

It started after the Burning of York and the White House.

The teens would get seriously drunk, meet up at a bar near their borders and beat the Hell out of each other.

As they matured they agree that this was reckless and decided to try and work out their differences in a civilized manner.

…

And if that didn't work then they would beat the Hell out of each other.

Try as they might to keep these private…one day they were discovered.

* * *

The UN members were in silent shock at the scene before them. Just moments ago Alfred had been yelling at them to shut up and actually listen to Matt's idea on what to do about global warming when he told his nearly invisible twin to stop being a pansy and speak up.

Then everything went pear shaped.

A skillet went flying out of nowhere and decked Alfred right in the head. Then right after it was the angry Canadian.

Alfred snapped into what Lithuania could only describe as 'Brooklyn Rage' and went New Yorker on his brother. In a matter of seconds the two brothers were in a brawl that made Arthur's brother Alistar freak out and hide behind Gilbert, who was hiding behind Feliciano and Ludwig.

That's how epic it was.

Shirts were ripped off, knuckles were bleeding, and Francis was pretty damn sure the Matt bashed his brother's head through the wall so hard you could see through it.

"They'll tire out soon." Roderich commented.

**-Three Hours Later-**

The fight was still going strong. The entire floor was in ruins except for the room were the other Nations had barricaded themselves.

Arthur sighed.

"This calls for extreme measures."

Francis paled. "You don't' mean-"

"No! Not her aru!" Yao screamed and hugged his siblings close to him.

"Let go…" Kiku choked as he tried to loosen the man's grip.

"She'll kill them!"

"SHE'LL KILL US!"

Ivan just smiled and hit a number on his phone's speed dial. "I'll call her, da."

Tino and Berwald had no idea who the others were talking about, but for some reason they had the urge to beat Ivan into a bloody pulp, or in Tino's case run his down with his sleigh.. repeatedly. So did the other Nordics for some reason.

Ivan was talking in rapid Russian on his phone. The person on the other side said something that made him blush.

Now the Nordics really wanted to hurt him without knowing why.

"She is coming."

A minute later the sounds of fighting stopped…and were replaced by screams of horror and fear, gunshots, and two loud thuds.

They opened the door…only to see a hooded figure dragging the twins away, and leaving a trail of blood.

The figure paused and turned to them. All they could see was the lower half of the person's face under the hood.

"See you tonight."

The nations all had the same thought.

Ivan was dating the devil.


	38. Thunderbird

CH. 38 ~ Thunderbird

9foxgrl

**Inspired by silverheartlugia2000**

The young North America twins had been traveling for some time now with their sister Vinland. They had no idea who their parents were, just that they were somehow tied to the land, the elder to the land in the south and the younger to the land in the north. Their sister Vinland had a tie to the land further up north, but it was weak now.

The twins didn't know what their names were until they came across a tribe of nomads who called them Maska (America) and Kanata (Canada); the spirits of the land.

"Big sister…I'm getting tired." Maska whispered as he tugged on his sister's arm.

Vinland paused and looked at them. "Are you tired too Kanata?"

Kanata looked up at her with weary eyes and nodded.

"Alright…" Vinland sighed; it was getting dark, and from the chill it was going to rain so they should stop for some shelter soon. She looked around and found a small clearing on a rocky ledge two feet above them under the shelter of some trees. Letting her miniscule brothers climb onto her back; she carried them up. Just as they reached the top it started to pour.

The twins both hopped off when they reached the top and started a fire like the nomads had taught them to while Vinland split up some of their food.

Maska and Katana squealed as lightning flashed in the sky.

"It's okay." She said as they hugged her. "It's just a storm-"

CRASH!

The twins screamed as the lightning crashed a few feet from them. Vinland tightened her hold on them as a large bird landed in the field. It didn't seem to notice them as it was too busy fighting a rather large dragon looking serpent in the tall grass they were about to walk into before they stopped to rest.

The siblings watched the fight which the large bird won. In the morning they walked to the scorched area and found three feathers.

-Two Hundred Years Later-

It started to rain and thunder during a meeting. The micro nations who had tagged along squealed as lightning flashed across the sky.

"It's okay." Matt said as he and Alfred walked to them.

"It's just a thunder bird fighting a Unktehila." Alfred said to them.

"There are no such things." Arthur scolded them.

The twins shook their heads and touched their amulets hidden under their shirts. Each carved in the shape of a thunder bird the feathers they had found tied to them seemed to crackle with the power of the storm.

The sky was illuminated by the lightning and they saw the shadow of a large bird flying past the building with a serpent in its claws.

"They are real." The twins replied.


	39. Wendigo pt 4

Ch. 39 Wendigo pt. 4

9foxgrl

"_Don't go! Please do go outside!"_

"_Alfred, I need more fire wood!" Arthur snapped at a young Alfred who trying to keep him from leaving their home by grabbing his leg. _

"_But there are monsters out there." Alfred screamed, as he looked up at him with teary eyes. _

"_There are no such things as monsters, wait inside poppet." _

"_Please don't go!" Alfred cried as the door closed. _

Arthur gasped as he bolted awake.

'_That night…was Alfred trying to protect me from something?'_

He looked around and realized that it was morning. Francis and Feliciano were on the other side of the loft still asleep. The other nations were already up and either reading or in Ludwig's and Yao's case; playing checkers.

He got up to wake up Alfred only to see his bed had not even been slept in all night.

Arthur raced downstairs to see Alfred sitting in a corner near the fire with his bomber jacket draped over him like a blanket. He got closer and realized the young Nation was asleep.

"He refused to let me take over at 0100 hours." Matt sighed. "He is really stubborn."

"He is." Arthur replied.

"Ohayo." Kiku said with a small yawn as he and Feliciano came down.

Francis and the others soon followed.

"Ve, is Alfred just now going to sleep?" Italy asked as Alfred snuggled deeper into his jacket.

"It looks like it."

"_Pauvre petit Alfred."_ Francis commented as he moved closer.

"Touch me and die." Alfred muttered in his sleep.

Francis flinched. "Are you sure he is asleep?"

Ivan strolled forward and raised his pipe to hit Alfred, only to have it blocked by a hunting knife. Alfred didn't even open his eyes.

"Da, he is." Ivan said cheerfully.

Arthur glared at him. "Don't do that."

"Let's get our meeting started." Matt said as he brought in a tray of food.

"What about Alfred?" Yao asked.

"I'm up." Alfred commented as he took a cup of coffee.

"You-"

"I am wide awake." Alfred commented then sat back down in his corner. "If I can deal with a week of nonstop meetings with an average of three hours' sleep every two nights, I can do this with only an hour worth of sleep."

"Okay…first topic-"

The rest of the early morning meeting passed rather well. Alfred dozed off every now and them but would wake up if someone asked him a question. The threat of the cannibal creatures lurking in the woods kept them from arguing over petty things.

1700 Hours – Alfred downed a bowl of soup that Francis made then went upstairs to lie down. Arthur followed him (under the excuse of wanting to read his novel in peace) and smiled as the young nation fell asleep.

2000 Hours- Matt put on his red flannel jacket, and a touque* and climbed up to the stand with his gun slung over his shoulder.

2230 Hours- The nations jumped as they heard a round of gunshots, and a flare hitting something followed by Matt screaming "HELL YEAH! TAKE THAT YOU PANSIES! TAKE OFF!" at the top of his lungs.

"…"

"He can get scary when he gets a gun aru."

"Da, but he is more terrifying operating a fighter plane."

* * *

-Day 2-

0100 Hours – Alfred relieved Matt at the post.

0230 Hours- The nations were awakened by a round of gun fire.

0645 Hours- Alfred climbed down and dragged the wendigo corpses into a ditch at the edge and set them on fire.

"There were nine when we got here on Friday." Alfred said as he wolfed down some scrambled eggs. "Mattie, Feli and I killed one and then another two last night. There are still four left and since the first frost is coming tomorrow tonight is their last chance."

"So what do you suggest we do?" Matt asked.

Alfred suddenly sported a grin that made Ivan remember the Cold War.

"Battle Royal anyone?"

That night all the nations were perched either on the roof or in the upstairs windows with guns and some flare grenades. A midnight the last four wendigos came flying from the trees. As soon as they cleared the tree line the nations opened fire.

The air was filled with the sounds of gunfire, explosions, and psychotic laughter. As well as the nation's yelling obscenities in their native languages and slang.

In an hour the nations would celebrate the sunrise as the wendigos were set on fire.

-Heading Home-

"Well our bosses should be happy that we can actually work together." Francis said as he tossed his bag into the back of Alfred's truck.

"Yeah, nothing says learning to work together like fighting off a pack of cannibal monsters." Matt commented.

"We must never do it again." Kiku commented.

"No one is going to believe us about it, aru."

"Not without thinking we have gone around the bend." Arthur commented.

"Next year we should go vampire hunting in the caves of Missouri or after the Jersey Devil!"

"NO!"

**A/n: I actually had this finished last night, but my computer shut off before I could save it! T.T**

**Touque: Canadian slag for winter hat**


	40. Question of Intelligence

Ch. 40~Question of Intelligence

9foxgrl

"Before I begin my presentation I will like to point out a contradiction that several of you have made about all Americans being idiots."

"There's a contradiction?" someone muttered in disbelief.

"If it was true that all Americans are idiots then why was there an increase of international students to my universities for degrees in business, engineering, education, medicine, and politics in the past two years?" Alfred asked in a cold voice. "Especially considering a majority comes from your own country China."

Yao paled.

"After all I am only second to India in the number of universities and number one country when it comes to students who attend a university in their lifetimes!"

Several nations paled at those statistics.

"While Canada does have the most citizens with a higher education many international students spend semesters or even years in the universities of the United States and the United Kingdom, and besides, if my bosses wanted to they could probably use the amount of federal aid we give said students as a way of us paying off our debts."

"…"

"I win bitches, now on the matter of the tsunami alert system."

_A/N: I don't get that stereotypes that we Americans are idiots. If they really think that why bother coming to our schools? I met a guy my freshman year from South Korea studying business, he was nice._

_I don't know if the federal aid we give international students counts as a way of paying off our foreign debts._


	41. Paparazzi

Ch. 41 Paparazzi

9foxgrl

Arthur and Alfred were having tea with the royal family in the gardens of Buckingham palace. Arthur was relieved that Alfred was behaving himself. He was even dress properly, and had not once made a comment about the food or the tea!

"I've heard you've been having problems with the paparazzi." Alfred commented.

He had endured listening to Arthur yell at Francis about those pictures that one of his tabloids had printed of Kate and William on vacation. After seeing several of those go after numerous bosses and friends he began to resent the tabloids.

"Yes, they are…rather persistent." Kate said in a low uneasy voice.

"Like vultures." William commented.

Alfred was about to reply when he heard a subtle clicking noise behind him. Immediately his Cold War era instincts kicked in and he looked around.

"Is something wrong Mr. Jones?" Queen Elizabeth asked.

Alfred snatched his saucer and flung it into the nearest tree. Arthur and the royal family gawked as a loud yelp was heard and a man wearing a camera fell out of the tree. He tried to run only to be pinned to the ground by several well aimed pieces of cutlery.

"Get enough pictures _pervert_?" Alfred hissed as he crushed the camera under his foot.

"Please don't kill me!"

"Believe me, if we were in the states, I would have popped a cap in your ass." Alfred snarled as his Brooklyn Rage started to surface. The man nearly pissed himself.

"How did you know he was there?" Arthur gasped as the guards came and took the man away.

"Dude, you don't go toe to toe with someone like Ivan during an arms race without learning how to detect nearby spies!" Alfred said in a cheerful voice.

_A/N: I read in a magazine article earlier that the paparazzi are really making Kate and William nervous. They're like stalkers. And considering what happened to Princess Diana I can understand why Prince William is upset about it. _


	42. Sports

Ch. 42 – Sports

9foxgrl

Inspired by _Cryptvo keeper_

The desire to compete turns strong between siblings; and there is no denying that statement between the North American brothers. It actually came to the point that Maria (Mexico) and her cousins to the South flat out refused to referee any of their games.

Lacrosse

– One of the oldest games on the continent. The twins learned how to play early on from their tribes. The game was so fierce that the game would only be one on one and the others would be in full body armor.

Basketball

- The fact that the game had been invented in Canada did not stop anything. It was Brooklyn meets Montreal. Shirts and skins, stars and leafs. It was a collision of egos and hoop shots. They had to stop playing in the Bronx however after they nearly caused a riot.

Hockey

- Alfred only played this with his brother if he was truly bored or had no other option. This was Matt's game, no matter what happened. Even if by some shot of luck he won…Then he would spend the next 24 hours hiding in various countries of Europe or Asia or if he was brave enough; hiding under Russia's bed with Belarus as company.

Football

- This was Alfred's sport. With his monstrous strength he had a tackle that could stop a monster truck. It would be a true grid iron matches. Especially if Matt was angry about something.

Baseball

- This sport was also well loved by both sides, but Alfred especially. It was very rare that they could play with a full team of willing volunteers. Afterwards Tony would always complain that they kept knocking his satellites out of orbit.


	43. Chibi! The Return pt 1

Ch. 43 Chibi!: The Return

Pt. 1

9foxgrl

_This hit me when I was watching an episode of __The Melancholy of Haruhi-chan Suzumiya _

"Alright, the meeting is dismissed." Arthur sighed as he took down his power point. "No can someone please go find Alfred and Matthew?"

As if on cue; Alfred burst in screaming as a small object on his head tried to stab him with a steak knife.

"HOLD STILL SO I CAN KILL YOU!" the object yelled in a tiny feminine voice.

"NO! I WANT TO LIVE!" Alfred screamed as he ran around the hall. "MATTIE! GET HER OFF!"

Matt ran in with a lasso and a burlap sack.

"ASTRID! DON'T KILL HIM!"

"FINE I'LL KILL YOU!" 'Astrid' said, jumping off Alfred and heading to the Canadian.

"MAPLE!" Matt screamed as he dove over the table and got behind Gilbert and Francis.

Alfred grabbed the lasso and managed to catch her midflight. There was a stunned silence as they saw Astrid's…diminutive size.

Astrid looked to be about two years old (barely a foot tall to boot), had long blonde hair, that was restrained on both sides by a green and black ribbon, and wearing a white gown with a hand carved whistle around her neck.

"WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT?" she hissed breaking them out of their stupors.

Berwald immediately went and picked her up. Alfred took the opportunity to scurry behind Arthur. Berwald tossed away the knife then set her down in Tino's lap. Tino squealed as he hugged her.

"SO CUTE!" Tino said cheerfully as he cuddled her. "She's like a little baby!"

"I AM NOT A BABY!" Astrid screamed starling Tino.

She tried to escape, but Berwald caught her as she jumped off Tino's lap, this time he held her.

"I assume that it was magic that did this?" Lukas asked as he and the other Nordics looked at their 'little' sister as she pouted in Berwald's arms.

"She had a run in with Alistair when he was drunk." Matt commented. "…and he cursed her when she refused to go out with him."

Arthur and Sarah face palmed. In the back Ivan began to subtlety chant 'Kol kol kol' under his breath.

"Bloody Hell." Arthur huffed.

"He's dead, isn't he?" Sarah asked.

"He's alive…and still sobering up…" Matt said uneasily.

"Yeah, in the hospital after Sis nearly drowned him." Alfred commented as he felt safe now that Astrid was safely restrained.

"He is going to die as soon as this spell is undone!" Astrid hissed liked an angry cat.

Berwald must have noticed this, and petted the top of her head to try and calm her down.

Matt took a book out from his jacket. "We got the counter spell to undo this but…"

"…We can't cast it until we gather all the regents necessary to make the change." Alfred as he got ready to run.

"That's why you attack them?" Anderson asked.

"No, it's because they said they can't do it." Astrid pouted.

The Nordics looked at the twins in such a cold manner, they flinched.

"It's not that!" Alfred yelled. "These ingredients have to be collected from the British countryside at specific times in the lunar cycle, and then the spell can't be done until the full moon!"

Astrid felt a small part of her die as she remembered that night was a new moon. "You mean…I'll be this small … FOR A MONTH?"

The twins nodded.

"And…due to these specific times…we were hoping that…you guys could watch her." Matt said looking at Tino nervously.

"Of course we will take care of her!" Tino cheered. Berwald nodded in agreement.

"It's only proper we raise our little girl!" he said making Astrid blush.

"We're in too!" Anderson cheered. Emil and Lukas nodded in agreement.

Astrid pouted. "Fine, just don't treat me like a baby!"

"Arthur, we're going to need some help locating some of this stuff." Matt said showing Arthur the list of regents.

"That's fine, I'll be happy to help." Arthur said surveying the list. "Some of these we can get tonight near Aberdeen."

Alfred bravely raised a camera and snapped a picture of Astrid in Berwald's arms.

"I AM GOING TO SHOVE THAT CAMERA DOWN YOU THROAT!" Astrid screamed as her younger brothers took off running, dragging Arthur with them.

"Children should not speak so inappropriately." Berwald scolded.

Astrid growled as Lukas approached her. Tino and Berwald were too busy thinking of what cute outfits to dress her in to notice her be placed in his arms.

"You can call me Big Brother." Lukas deadpanned.

**LATER**

"I'M NOT SLEEPING IN A CRADLE! NO MATTER HOW CUTE IT IS!"

"Don't worry. At least she thinks it's cute." Tino said trying to cheer the large Swedish man up as he left the impromptu 'nursery'.

Astrid pouted as she sat in her cradle. Ugh it felt weird just to say, let alone think.

_Her_ cradle. She spent her entire life sleeping out in the wilderness or in the comfort of her small cottage.

'_Oh well'_. She thought as she hugged the stuffed wolf Emil had gotten for her and crawled under a blanket. _'At least I can have some comfort knowing the brats and Arthur are probably being chased by Nessie across the Scottish moors right now.'_

Meanwhile….

"DOWN NESSIE! DOWN GIRL!" Alfred yelled as he tried to ride the Loch Ness monster like a bucking bronco. Behind him Arthur and Matt were holding on for dear life.

"BLOODY HELL!"

"MAPLE!"

**Country Name Bank**

**Alistair – Scotland**

**Anderson – Denmark**

**Berwald- Sweden **

**Emil- Iceland**

**Lukas – Norway **

**Sarah – Ireland**

**Tino- Finland **

**A/n: Hey everyone, I might not update until next week due this big papers due at the end of the week. But don't worry. I shall return!**


	44. Chibi! The Return pt 2

Ch. 44 Chibi! The Return

Pt. 2

Astrid sighed as Lukas put her in the swing for the third time today.

It was Day 29 since she had shrunk back to her childlike state thanks to a drunken country called Alistair aka Scotland. She had toned down her rage after Matt informed her that they were having to be chased by various fae and other paranormal things in Wales. So far the Nordics loved the fact that she was little again and tried to treat her such as a way to compensate for missing her childhood.

Tino would dress her in cute frilly little outfits (taking pictures of her in each one) so often that Astrid was swearing now that he was really a she. Berwald practically carried her everywhere on his shoulders and treated her like she was made of glass. He even scolded Anderson for trying to give her a toy wooden sword.

At least Anderson _tried_ to treat her like normal. Especially after he found out her whistle was to call on wolves. Berwald's face when he saw Anderson being chased by a large pack, with Astrid riding on the lead wolf…she hoped someone got a photo for her. Especially when he stumbled on her talking to her spirit wolf (which was twice her size in this form) in her room (IT'S NOT A NURSERY!)

Lukas was okay when they debated magic or he let her read his books…but when he tried too hard to be a big brother it was annoying…like now.

"Wee…Wee…"

"ASTRID!"

"ALFRED!" she screamed jumping off the swing as it reached a high arch, scaring the hell out of Lukas in the process, and took off across the lawn. Never had she been so happy to see those three blonde heads. "DID YOU GET ALL THE INGREDIENTS?"

"Yes, and the git nearly got us killed." Arthur snapped.

"Yeah, but now you can tell Alistair someone actually could tame Nessie." Matt said tiredly. "Something he couldn't do."

Arthur grinned evilly. It made the twins flinched because it looked like was about to revert to Captain Kirkland. "True, I can't wait to see his face when I tell him that his monster of Loch Ness was wrangled."

"The full moon is tomorrow tonight, so we can start drawing the circle now."

"YES!" Astrid screamed bringing the other Nordics running. "I GET TO TURN NORMAL AGAIN!"

"First we have to get a family picture!" Tino screamed running inside to get a camera.

The next morning after Astrid awoke in her adult body, she went to Edinburgh to finish beating up Alistair. Tino cried in the now empty nursery meanwhile Berwald made a special frame for the large family portrait that would hang on the mantle.


	45. Astrid's Revenge

Ch. 45 Astrid's Revenge

9foxgrl

This was created through collaboration with **91RedRoses**

Astrid was smiling sadistically as she finally caught her prey. She had been hunting him for several hours now.

"Hello Astrid, I see you are looking wonderful and as ever this morning." Alistar said trembling like leaf.

"Cut the crap. You die now." Astrid hissed, taking a step forward, one hand holding a hunting knife with a fine edge.

"Now! Now! Let's not be hasty! We all make mistakes in the past-"

"Try one month ago!" Astrid hissed.

"- AND I know I regret mine!" Alistair said trying to get help from his siblings and the Nordic nations were sitting on some bleachers a few feet away waiting for the bloodshed to begin. Anderson was filming it, and Alfred had rigged up a small wireless hot spot to televise it live.

"So in the attempt of peace what do you say we forget I turned you into a toddler and let bygones, be bygones?"

"…"

Alistair tried to give her his best 'gentlemen' smile.

"…"

"Do you think brother can B.S. his way out of this?" William (Wales) asked Arthur.

"Not bloody chance in the south of Hades."

"You. Die. Now."

"Yeah, that's what I thought." Alistair sighed before screaming as the pain began.

A few miles away some rowdy men in a bar all stopped as they heard some screams of agony coming from one of the distant fields.

"Sounds like someone pissed off the wrong lass." The bartender said voicing what they were all thinking.

"Hey! For every scream we drink!" someone yelled.

"I think she is going with the nine iron next." William commented casually.

"Bollocks. I know she carries a gun everywhere with her."

"Sword." Berwald grunted.

"Ooh! That's going to smarts." Sarah said as Alistair was grabbed by his kilt and flung across the meadow like a wire hammer. He ended up landing face first and skidding a yard before coming to a halt.

"Me and Mattie are going with a combination of weapons." Alfred commented. "Astrid never likes to limit herself to one weapon; she says it is foolhardy and not as fun."

"Yeah, Alfred's right. And I didn't think you were supposed to stick a nine iron there." Matt added as Alistair screamed again.

"Probably not regulation with the golf people, but Astrid has never cared for golf…" Anderson laughed.

"Stop babbling and hand me that hammer next to you." Astrid huffed. "Least you can do is help your big sister by getting her things!"

"Yes Astrid!" the twins said in unison.

"I would feel sorry for him…but he had it coming." Arthur commented as he took a drink from his thermos (Only Alfred and William knew it was rum).

"That and there is the fact she is beating him up."

"That too." Arthur said cheerfully.


	46. Over Excessive

Ch. 46 Over excessive

9foxgrl

Matt had to agree that his brother was over excessive, and that was putting it mildly. If he put his heart in something, it was going to happen.

* * *

For example after seeing that Arthur's birthday was going to be on the day of a conference he was hosting, he ran out to Sam's Club and bought ingredients to make a giant cake.

And what a cake it was.

Arthur nearly passed out when he saw a cake almost half his size that looked exactly like Big Ben, right down to scale, even down to the last detail. It helped that Alfred hid a CD player in the meeting hall that started playing God Save the Queen to boot.

* * *

Then there was cleanliness.

Alfred was not a slob, no matter what anyone said. In fact he had borderline OCD (Matt suspected Kiku based an anime character off that but that was an entirely different issue) when it came to organization.

Not to mention a fascination with the number seven.

No one believed this until Matt set off an ash bomb in his brother's living room with a hidden camera stuffed in the chandelier.

Alfred shrieked in horror at the mess before running into a closet and coming out wearing a hazmat suit, a bucket of soapy water, a vacuum, and a bristle brush.

With a battle cry worthy of the Spartans he attacked everything covered in the ash, including Tony who was an unfortunate victim, until they sparkled.

After watching the footage the G8 secretly declared Alfred to be more of a clean freak then Ludwig.

…the German whole heartedly agreed.

No doubt, his brother was missing a few screws.


	47. I Shall Not

Ch. 47 I Shall Not

(pt.2)

In continuation with the last contract (_Which we totally did not follow_) we the North American twins shall not: 

**Sing the sesame street pasta song during a meeting; nor teach the lyrics to Feliciano **

"You don't have to be Italian to enjoy this pasta treat~!"

Some of the nations followed the twins' brilliant idea of listening to their i-pods/mp3s as Feliciano sang the song for the fifth time.

"PASTA! PASTA! VERY GOOD FOR YOU!"

**Show Lovino 'Return of the Killer Tomatoes'**

"CHIGGI!" the representation of S. Italy screamed when he saw the bowl of tomatoes in Antonio's hands.

**Have a cleaning war with Ludwig in Yao's house**

"AIYAH! IT'S TOO SHINY. ARU!" Yao screamed as he hid under some black out curtains.

**Or in Ivan's basement**

"How nice. They got all the bloodstains out too.

"Amazing." The Baltics gasped.

"The walls were white?" Eduard gasped.

**Getting Tony to let me borrow his space ship so I can make awesome crop circles in Arthur's country**

"YOU BLOOD ALIEN!" Arthur screamed as he saw the newest designs on his fields.

"Fucking Limey!"

**Start random fires in Nations back yards while wearing a cloak and cackling like mad.**

"MON DIEU! PETITE MATIEU! Don't tell me that Arthur has corrupted you too!"

Matt just laughed causing his former caretaker to scream then faint.

**Take Anderson and Gilbert to see Wickerman Festival in Nevada**

"THIS IS AWESOME!"

"BURN BABY BURN!"

**Attempt to ward off the Finnish wrath**

"HOW LONG WAS HE DATING HER?"

"WE DON'T KNOW!" Alfred screamed as machine gun fire shot out his windows.

"DON'T LIE TO ME! I SAW THOSE PICTURES FELIKS POSTED ONLINE! SHE WAS DANCING WITH HIM IN A CLUB …IN THAT….RAHHH!"

"I KNEW THEY WENT OUT DRINKING, BUT THAT'S ALL!"

**Nor point him at the object of his anger **

"STAY AWAY FROM MY BABY!"

**Try to find Narnia**

"I TOLD YOU IT WAS IN HIS CLOSET!

"GET OUT OF THERE YOU GITS!"

**See how many sexual innuendoes it takes to make Francis's brain overload and faint**

-THUD!-

"It's about time. Iggy fainted twenty minutes ago."

**Take an unauthorized trip to Las Vegas**

"GIVE BACK MY TIGER!"

_Ah screw it, we're not going to follow any of these._


	48. Guide to the Twins

Ch. 48 Guide to the Twins

9foxgrl

_By the multiple threats and constant situations they have caused we; France, England, Mexico, and Vinland have created a simple guide to the North America twins America (Alfred F. Jones) and Canada (Matthew Williams). This is for everyone's safety and our own._

**Telling the difference** – The two may seem exactly identical, but only to the untrained eye. Matthew has longer, curly hair with a single long strand that curls out (Quebec). Alfred has darker, more neatly trimmed hair with a stubborn cowlick sticking out (Nantucket).

Matthew is nicer when he is not with his brother. Or so we'd like to hope anyway.

**Stalking** – Unless you are on very good terms with these two (aka family, lovers); _DO NOT STALK THEM._ As their neighbor I have found that they hate stalkers. For the love of Mexico City! Matthew once locked a stalker in a windowless room with a pack of wolverines!

Poor Gilbert still screams at the sight of that animal.

**April Fools Day** – This holiday is a red alert to all those who know or have seen what these boys can get up too! Especially Alfred! If they are in the vicinity or in a fifty km area; GET INTO A MOTHER FUCKING SHELTER!

The last time these two teamed up against Anderson and Gilbert in a prank war…the horror!

What those boys can do with saran wrap, and duct tape…MacGyver would be proud.

It's all that Bloody Frog's fault for teaching them about that stupid holiday!*

**Animals** – Don't mess with their favorite animals. Matthew will try to skin you alive if he even hears word of you hurting a polar bear or moose.

Alfred is the same about all wildlife, but insult his bald eagle and you will become the prey for Storm Wing's* talons.

**Drinking** – If you are going to drink with them recreationally, do be careful. Alfred is a smart drunk and will screw you over sideways if you try to undermine him.

Mathieu is more dangerous ironically. There is a 50/50 chance that you will end up fleeing for your life or having a good time.

Either way, which ever twin you try; wish you were dead.

**Dating** – You do know that you have to get Ms. Astrid's approval to date them?

So if you do something to break their heart (man or woman) she will sic a pack of wolves on you?

Enough said.

Adding to that; do not mention 'seizing of vital regions' around or directed at them. They will whip out a gun, chainsaw, war hammer, crossbow, etc. from their bulky jackets/hoodies and hunt you down.

**Driving** – Matt is a safe drive, Alfred however…pray to whatever you believe to protect you if he gets behind the wheel.

Especially in New York City.

If you do find yourself in such a situation; buckle up, pray your will is up to date, and hold on tight because Initial D has nothing on his skills behind the wheel.

**Anger** – If by some reason you pissed them off flee for your life.

Mathieu will go Manada on your tail and you will have a fear of flannel by the end.

Alfred…well no one really knows because he has such a stiff grasp on his temper. (By some bloody miracle). But all we know it can make both Ivan and Kiku run off screaming in terror.

* * *

*Arthur is referring to the French and Italian tradition where children and adult play tricks on each other.

* Storm Wing is the name I made up for Alfred's bald eagle companion.

**Thank you everyone who reviews!**

**Free Hetalia Mochis to you!**

**Now if you excuse me; I have to get back to this d*** paper!**


	49. Astrid's Journal

Ch. 49 Astrid's Journal

9foxgrl

_-Just some notes and pages from the journal of Astrid Hedvig-_

_Inspired by silverheartlugia2000, 91RedRoses, L337 m4n_

**Slender man**

Day 1- We have arrived in the more rural area of British Columbia after getting reports of multiple children missing from a residential area near the forest then turning up weeks later suffering from hallucinations and nightmares. One was found impaled in a tree. Those that return have a circle with an X marked through it cut into their skin.

Matthew is distraught by this. He is several frightened for his citizens; we know it is not a child predator like the Royal Mountain Guard believes. Alfred unfortunately could not come with us this time. He has to deal with a lady in white that was spotted on I 74 in Robeson County, North Carolina.

Day 2 - After hiding out in the rooftops of one of the abandoned homes we caught sight of a tall faceless man with spiderlike limbs at the edge of the forest. It literally reached into one of the home's upper story windows and grabbed two young children out.

We shot at it, but the bullets had no effect until Matthew used one of the special silver and iron bullet Alfred started using. It at least dropped the children.

Day 14- The creature has left the area; no trace of where it has gone. One of the children who was abducted earlier this month said it's name was Slender man.

* * *

**Dating standards**

Anyone who wants to date my little brothers has to meet my approval. Francis asked me one night what those would be so here are some basic things you should know.

You have to love them for who they are. Insanity and all.

Be a good listener or at least provide comfort

Have some form of intelligence. There is no way an idiot is going to be able to handle them.

Have flexible sanity. They are crazy so you will need to be able to hang onto whatever sanity you have.

So far there are only a few nations who meet these. I must try to get Ivan's older sister on a blind date with Matthew. Those two would be perfect. He has no argument seeing that Matthew is protective of anything that he loves.

As for Alfred…Hmm…I wonder if I can turn Arthur into a girl then send her/him to Vegas near all those wedding chapels while drunk. Arthur is more feminine. Or should I turn Alfred into a girl? He is more of a housewife sometimes. And I always wanted a little sister. At least that way it will be binding in any state or country.

Note to Self: research gender swap potion and or spell

* * *

**Spell Gone wrong**

I am currently writing this from the safety of my private magic study. I made an error on my last spell and have accidentally fused the boys to their animal spirits. Well…to their features anyway.

Alfred is currently sporting bunny ears and tail while Matthew has polar bear ears and fluffy tail. So the fusion was not complete. But they are pissed. I have not seen them like this since someone tried to burn down Matthew's favorite Timmy's or when someone insulted Alfred's horror flicks.

But I am not without injury either. I currently have a wolf tail and ears.

Have to go; I think Alfred figured out how to pick the lock.


	50. Nightmares

Ch. 50 Nightmares

9foxgrl

This was inspire by [APH] Where Babies Come From by _iammathewian_ on Youtube: /watch?v=PWMs2x9Dmtw

* * *

_"Papa Francis?"_

_"Qui? What is it Mathieu?" the Frenchman asked looking down at his petite charge._

_"Where do babies come from?" he asked innocently._

_A somewhat predatory, and hungry look appeared on the man's face. _

_Matt should have taken it as a sign to get out of there like a bat from Hell._

_"So you see Mathieu when a man loves a woman it's very simple. The man takes his *** and sticks it in a woman's****- then he"_

Matt woke up screaming. There was a crash as Arthur and Alfred bolted from his guest bedroom over to his and wrenched the door open.

"Mattie you okay?"

"What's wrong?"

Matt just cried and jumped into Arthur's arms. Alfred blinked as he realized what happened.

"Nightmare?"

Matt nodded.

"You dream about that day Francis told you where babies come from when you were a colony again?" he asked turning pale.

Matt just nodded.

"YOU POOR BABY!" Arthur cried out as he hugged him.

Matt wailed at the word baby.

"You're not helping!"


	51. USAgi!

Ch. 51- USAgi!

9foxgrl

_Inspired by Dark Inu Fan and 91RedRoses_

"Has anyone seen Matthew? It's not like him to be late."

CRASH!

"GET THE FUCK BACK HERE!"

"FIX US NOW!"

"IVAN!" shouted one of the blurs as it leaped onto the shocked Russian.

"Astrid?" he gawked. It was her, but she had a grey wolf tail and ears.

Matt and Alfred were after her holding their respective weapons. The nations gawked at their clearly not human appendages.

"Crap! Ivan if you ever want any again you'll knock them unconscious!" Astrid snapped.

Berwald fainted at her statement while Tino hissed.

"Brother, you might want to run." Matt said catching sight of a certain Asian country starring at his brother like he was a new rare collectible.

"Why?" Alfred asked, one of his rabbit ears twitched in confusion.

"Usagi." Kiku commented as he drew a net out of no were. "Kawaii."

-pop-

The Nations gawked as Alfred shrank to six inches tall then darted out of the room.

"MINE!" A now ninja clad Kiku yelled as he ran at top speed after the chibi rabbit hybrid.

Being fused with a rabbit spirit was really helpful at times.

"…"

"…This is one of those times I bet he is happy that his spirit animal specializes in trickery." Astrid deadpanned.

"…You know what; I'm just going home now." Matt sighed as he adjusted his hoodie to cover his bear ears and tail. "Sis, fix this soon. For the love of Maple."

"But you look so cute Birdie!" Gilbert chuckled. "Or should I call you Teddy now?"

Gilbert, this is Bear claw. Bear claw, Gilbert. You two should get to know each other.

"Mein Bruder." Ludwig sighed as Gilbert hit the floor as Matt left.

"WILL SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME HERE?" Chibi-Alfred snapped as he hopped at full speed down the hall.

"Hold still!" Ninja Kiku snapped. "I must add you to my collection!"

"NEVER!" Chibi-Alfred said as he used his spirit magic to replicate by ten as he jumped onto the table then dart out in various directions of the meeting room.

Only to see Kiku do the same. "Bushin no Jutsu!"

'_STUPID NINJAS!_' Alfred huffed as he dove for cover in Arthur's suitcase while his replicas were harvested.

They would disappear once they got twenty feet away from him.

But boy, would Arthur get a surprise when he got home and opened his suitcase.


	52. Alfred's Prank Book

Ch. 52 – Alfred's Prank Book

9foxgrl

Inspired by _**Norway on Caffeine **_by _**Sakuralove1 (/watch?v=SFZa7kCIrEE&feature=related) **_**and [APH] Dinner at America's by Kanae by iammathewian (/watch?v=XFbjkU_g5lI&feature=relmfu)**

* * *

**Banned Prank List Section 3 – Food & Drink**

**Giving Lukas (Norway ) coffee **

_Honestly this prank was unintentional. He accidentally took a drink from my pumpkin spice latte that had an extra shot of espresso when I met him outside of Starbucks. (According to Sis he's not suppose to have coffee anymore after some incident with a ship during their viking years) So what was he doing there anyway? Getting high off coffee fumes?_

_Whatever, anyway I didn't know what happened until he started giggling like mad, said something about getting a boatload of puffins, then randomly screamed "GOD MORGEN! Life is beautiful!" Scared a lot of the normal people. _

_Hell! It freaked out both me and Emil (Iceland) out. Thankfully, he had a caffeine crash in thirty minutes. _

_Even though it was an accident, I got blamed. _

**Telling Mattie I BBQ Kumajiro **

_I don't know what I was thinking when I did this. I was probably high or something. It was the 70's. But I invited Mattie over for breakfast and served him REGULAR BACON but I told him it was made from polar bear. _

_When I came to an hour later he was outside conducting a funeral. _

_Dude, seriously? _

**Pranking Big Sis's fruit smoothies **

_Never. Again. _

_I like being a man thank you. And even thought it was interesting be stuck as a girl for 72 hours I found out 3 things_

_1- Iggy seems to have a thing for blue eyed girls (It could have just been because he was still in shock that I was girl)_

_2- Being a girl is hard work_

_3- Mattie always has his blackmail camera on him (I still can't find those photos he took of me! I swear if he sold them to a pervert or something I will ask Big Bro Ivan *yeah he has us call him that now* to help me get them)_

**Giving Feliciano coffee **

_While it did keep Ludwig from attacking us during WWII, he made me swear when we became allies to never do it again. _

…_Even though I totally forgot and slipped Feli a chocolate chip Frappuccino a minute ago. _

_Hold on; have to go see why everyone is screaming right now. _

_HOLY CRAP! FELI JUST DECKED IVAN AND KICKED LUDWIG IN THE HEAD! OMG~!_

_FRAPPES DON'T EVEN HAVE MUCH COFFEE IN THEM!_

_MEMO TO SELF- DO NOT INTRODUCE FELI TO ESPRESSO _

**Making Feli go through pasta withdraw**

_Got to admit, it was a good psychological weapon on him during the war. But I am so happy that I was not there when he was let go. According to Iggy it was bad so they shot him out of a cannon into enemy territory just to get rid of him!_

**Live frogs & snails for Francis**

_Again, another unintentional one but totally cool since Iggy helped me! Francis did tell us to collect them. _

_But then Iggy had the idea to fill his bed with them._

_Let's just say we sure made an impression on the French Prime Minister when he came in to see why his nation was late!_

**Iggy's tea**

_This was not me, but I'm making a memo so I never try it!_

_Iggy's big bro Alistair (Scotland) totally busted in a G8 meeting to yell at Iggy over something about spoiled haggis…and goat…and something else, I think it was angus. Don't think he was talking about the meat…didn't Iggy say Alistair had a pet named Angus…or something?. (Memo to self: find out later)_

_But anyway; when he was done yelling he took Iggy's tea and spilled it over his head. _

_I never knew Iggy was a BAMF! _

_He totally kicked his ass out of the meeting hall! It took all of us, minus Mattie and Feli just to pry him off! _

_I talked to William (Wales) about it later. He said never mess with Iggy's tea or something bad will happen. _

…

_Crap! Totally had a thought; Iggy might still be mad about the Boston Tea Party_

_(Memo to self: Do not mention that day around Iggy ever!)_


	53. Matt's Blackmail Log

Ch. 53 – Matt's Blackmail Log

9foxgrl

Log #122012AFJ

_Item – includes pictures of Alfred (Amelia) after the smoothie incident _

_ 5 – Marilyn Monroe signature poses _

_ 2 –shots of modeling swimsuits at the mall_

_ 3- shots in various dresses _

Log #132012FB

Entry –_ I successfully carried out my plan to make Francis regret forgetting me all those years. I hypnotized Alfred before our meeting and made him speak using only British colloquial throughout. Luckily I told Arthur ahead of time, so when I did it as well he just acted like we spoke like that all the time. _

_Included- 20 minute video of Francis freaking out_

_Extra note: Arthur had me hypnotize Alfred into being a vegetarian for a week. _

Log#0002001AFJ

_I have gotten my revenge on Alfred for making me believe that he BBQ Kumajiro. I told him that the burgers he was eaten I made from Whale-Dude. _

_His face!_

_Included- 12 still shots _

Log#8924C

_Totally got my revenge on Cuba for thinking I was my brother. During that last big crab migration I stuffed like fifty or so his room while he took a siesta. _


	54. Edited History

Ch. 54 ~ Edited History

9foxgrl

Inspired by _Well Italy…That was unexpected by Yickind (/watch?v=I6DiENp5vR0&playnext=1&list=PLC154B0D782D708EF&feature=results_video)_

* * *

_Jones Log: So a few days ago Tony created a simulation machine meant to help make critical decisions and let me and Mattie test drive it._

_Basically we would say an event in history then a change we would like to see happen and it would be appear before us like a movie. _

So we totally had some fun.

What if:

**America lost the Revolution**

"Sir! We have successfully conquered all of Europe and North America."

"Excellent." Arthur said as Alfred stood to his side as a butler with his arms chained. Arthur was dressed like a noble and sitting casually in a throne like chair."And what of Northern Africa?"

"All that is left is Egypt sir."

"Perfect. Soon the British Empire shall control the world." Arthur said laughing psychotically.

* * *

"Alfred?"

"Yeah Bro?"

"…I'm glad you won."

"Me too…we must never speak of this again."

"Fucking Limey."

* * *

**Italy succeeded on Seychelles**

"I'm done here." Feliciano huffed. The lack of pasta and all the beatings were annoying him.

"Did you forget that we're trying to conquer Europe!" Ludwig snapped, ignoring Kiku and the Allies.

"Who gives a shit, GET A FUCKING LIFE!"

* * *

"Dude, WTF."


	55. Happy United Nations Day

Announcement

_Pan in on 9foxgrl sitting with Arthur at a café enjoying tea._

9foxgrl: Relax, I'm not taking down/abandoning this fic, I just wanted to say "Happy United Nations Day" to everyone. Or as I have dubbed it now "Hetalia Day"

_-twins pop up-_

Alfred: We'll get onto our secret wacky adventures now.

Matt: and our conspiracy to make Arthur go grey!

Together: See ya!

_-Twins speed off in the batmobile-_

Arthur: Bloody Hell, they can't sit still for more than a minute?

9foxgrl: It could be worse.

Arthur: What could be?

9foxgrl: they could have teamed up with the BTT by now.

Arthur _*blanches*:_ Bloody Hell


	56. Epic Formation!

Ch. 56 ~ Epic Formation

9foxgrl

_This was motivated by Riialuvsanime, HetaPastaH3ro, 91RedRoses, and AngelicZombieCat_

Arthur, Ludwig, Astrid, and the leaders of France, Spain, America, and Canada all sat in a conference room either pinching their noses to ward off a headache, starring at the news report in disbelief, or wondering how the Hell was what they were watching pulled off without someone knowing about it.

"Why did they do this again?" the French Prime Minster asked aloud.

"Apparently quote: We need to celebrate United Nations day in a totally awesome manner to promote the awesomeness of world peace." Ludwig said reading his brother's statement.

"By setting off fireworks and holding a concert near the UN building?" Arthur deadpanned.

"I have to admit they did a good job." The Spaniard commented. "For something put together in such a short amount of time they did a good job."

"No offense, but don't encourage them." The US President and Canadian Prime Minister sighed as they remembered several hijinks the twins pulled off in 2011 alone. "It will only motivate them to do it again."

"Wasn't Peter involved in this too?" Astrid asked.

"The Nordics have him on time out right now, since all he did was pass out the flyers and help sell some of the concert t-shirts."

"At least they didn't get Feliciano and Lovino involved too." Ludwig sighed.

There was a round of shuddering as they remembered the Central Park incident.

"Let's look on the bright side. At least they were promoting World Peace instead of a World War."

"I think that song Alfred and Matthew sang did the most effect." Arthur commented. "What was the name?"

"It was a rendition of _Waving Flag_ by Chani." Astrid said as she looked at the report on the table. She blinked. "How is it the twins and Peter were caught before the BTT?"

There was an embarrassed cough before someone answered.

"They…have more experience evading and running from law enforcement." Ludwig answered.

"Well, I think we let them stew long enough. Shall we get them out of jail?"

"That's if they haven't escaped already."

"I doubt it. There are Navy Seals, CIA, the Royal Mounted Patrol, Scotland Yard and M16 stationed there." Arthur said confidently before an aide ran in.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but those men escaped."

*Cue thunder crash and the howling of wolves*

"Excuse me while I go idiot hunting." Astrid said with a cold smile that frightened off Natalya.

"…She's tenacious."

"You have no idea."


	57. Battle of the Bands

Ch. 57 ~ Battle of the Bands

9foxgrl

"This is outrageous!"

Matt looked up at his brother as he hissed and spit over a flyer.

"What?"

"In order to compete in the Battle of the Bands we need a minimum of three members. Who are we going to get to play with us?"

"Gilbert?"

"He's playing with Francis and Antonio." Alfred hissed as he tossed down the flyer and went to grab his drumsticks in the music room. He suddenly paused. There above his guitar was a carefully framed autographed poster from The Beatles.

"I got an idea."

-One trip over the Atlantic Later-

"No."

"But-"

"I said no." Arthur huffed. "I am not going to go back to playing rock music!"

"Come on Iggy! I know you miss your punk days!" Alfred cooed as he hugged the stuffy British nation. "Please?"

"No. Way."

"Not even to beat Francis and the BTT?" Matt asked shrewdly.

Arthur's eyes lit up. "Beat Francis?"

"Utter humiliate." Matt sang. "He or Gilbert is supposed to be their lead singer."

"I bet none of them ever heard your bad ass singing." Alfred added.

Arthur mulled it over.

"Please?" the twins begged.

"Bloody Hell" Arthur groaned as he ruffled his hair, then smirked. "Fine; but I'm singing."

"YES!"

* * *

-Three Weeks Later-

Arthur stood confidently on stage with the twins as they waited for the curtain to go up for their turn.

Arthur's blond hair was spiked and had streaks of green and his ears were pierced. He wore a vest with the Union Jack imprint over his torn sleeved white t-shirt, black pants held up by a spike studded belt and complete with leather boots. His red electric guitar slung over his back.

Matt stood next to him with his white bass. He wore his hair tied back with the ponytail ends dyed red. He wore a black leather jacket over his white shirt, leather pants and boots. A single red maple leaf shaped earring dangled from his left ear.

Behind them was Alfred waiting with his drum set. He was dress in a more comfortable denim vest, no shirt (go ahead and scream fan girls), black pants and red converse sneakers with a large white star drawn on them. His hair was a bit wavier this time, streaked blue and held back with a US flag themed bandana.

"Let's show them how well we can do boys!" Arthur said with a devilish grinned as the curtain went up. "Get ready to lose Frog!"

"Punk Iggy is so cool!" Alfred cheered.

* * *

The next morning Arthur groaned as he woke up on his living room floor. There were empty beer bottles everywhere and phone ripped from the cord and the wall.

"Bloody Hell; what happened last night?" Arthur asked himself allowed as he got up. He then blinked.

Matt was still asleep sitting upside down on the sofa with his legs propped up, and his head on the floor. Alfred was snoring away half on the stairs, and the other half on the stair well balcony, looking like he might fall at any moment.

"That looks very uncomfortable." Arthur groaned as he collected the morning post; staring at the neon pink panties with 'call me' and a phone number written on them with lipstick stuffed into the bottom along with his newspaper and letters.

_'That is just disturbing.' _Arthur thought as he went back inside.

Junk, postcard from Australia with a koala, another hate letter from his older brothers. Uh oh.

There was also a letter bearing the royal crest.

_Dear Arthur, _

_I hope you got all that angst out, and will be in a better mood then you were a week ago._

_That was a very impressive performance; I see your vocals are not lacking. Harry and William were very enthusiastic to finally hear you sing again. _

_Don't worry; the bobbies dealt with all those fan girls who chased you from the concert and your trophy is safe in Buckingham Palace. Let the boys know that we have their instruments too._

_See you on Monday for tea and bring the boys._

_Sincerely,_

_Queen Elizabeth II_

"I guess that we did win…"


	58. Protective Families

Ch. 58 Protective Families

9foxgrl

Inspired by _SonarTheHedgehog's _ fanfic: **Somebody's Gonna Die**

* * *

The wrath of an older sibling who is protecting their younger ones is something amazing to see. It is actually an unspoken rule among some of the Nations that if one of the younger ones have an older brother/sister they would not do anything to hurt the young or they would be beaten black and blue.

For example:

Gilbert was protective of Ludwig. Not many except the members of the BTT (Bad Touch Trio), the Italys, and a few of his close allies know this. The only reason they know was because Ludwig was once kidnapped by Francis and Antonio as revenge for a prank that Gilbert had played on them. The two soon found themselves beaten, and tied up in a bell tower wearing very scandalous prom dresses.

Vash was deadly about protecting Lili. Everyone knew that. After all his main reason for shooting trespasser now a day was to prevent any streakers from going near Lili's windows.

To everyone's surprise Katyusha was very protective of her siblings. Something that an unfortunately man discovered when he tried to molest Natalya in passing while the women were in a crowded market. Her knitting needles are not for just knitting scarfs you know.

Peter everyone decided unanimously; was off limits to everyone! Sorin once scared the pants off him outside a UN meeting the day before Halloween dressed like Dracula. While Sarah and Tino tried to sooth him with lullabies from their countries; Arthur, Alfred, Matt, Astrid and the other Norns dragged the Romanian away kicking and screaming to the basement of the building.

No one is sure of exactly what happened that day. But when the group returned they all had a satisfied smirk on their faces. Not to mention it took Sorin two months to return to the meetings, and he still walked with a limp.

Nation's List

Katushya – Ukraine

Natalya – Belarus

Gilbert- Prussia

Vash – Switzerland

Lili- Lichtenstein

Peter- Sealand

Sarah - Ireland

Tino- Finland

Sorin- Romania


	59. Painful Loving Care

Ch. 59 Painful Loving Care

9foxgrl

**Inspired by silverheartlugia2000 and dedicated to those who are facing or have passed because of Super storm Sandy**

Alfred was lying on his bed shivering under a pile of comforters. Super storm Sandy was doing a number on him with the winds, rain, and flooding, not to mention snow!

Beside him Matt was doing no better. They both felt cold and their heads' were swimming.

"S-st-stop hogging the b-blankets!" Matt shivered as he tried to burrow closer to his brother for warmth.

"N-not…still too cold…" Alfred shuddered as he tried to curl up in a ball.

The bedroom door opened and Astrid walked in, followed by Francis and Arthur, each carrying towels, medicine and a basket of odds and ends.

"Feeling any better today?" Astrid asked as she stuck a thermometer in their mouths.

"Cold." The twins moaned.

Arthur frowned as he read the readings.

"Alfred is running a fever." Arthur said as Alfred took some Tylenol from him.

"Not surprising, with that fire in Queens." Francis replied as he dabbed at the sweat on Matt's forehead. "Their sinuses must still be suffering from the flooding."

Astrid and Arthur shared a look, and then said in unison: "Garlic."

"No! No garlic." The twins moaned.

"Let's at least get them some hot steam to clear up their sinuses before we tried that!" Francis said in a hasty voice.

"Yes! Listen to him!" Alfred moaned.

Francis stepped out and prepared a large bowl of hot water and added some salt for extra effect. He returned in time to see that in his absence the twins were forced to eat a clove of raw garlic and were crying in a huddled mass.

"I thought we were trying to make them better. Not torture _mon amis_." Francis said as he approached the bed.

As soon as he set the tray down the twins breathed in the steam, the taste of garlic on their tongues the only reminder of their torture.

"Arthur?"

"Yes poppet?"

"C-can I have some hot tea …please?" Alfred asked. Thanks to his flushed face being partly obscured by his blanket; it was impossible to tell if he was blushing with embarrassment.

"Me too please." Matt said weakly raising a hand.

Arthur gawked at the request then nodded. "Hot tea coming right up."

"Use the cinnamon sticks in the right cabinet. It's their favorite one." Astrid said as she made to follow.

"Where are you going?"

"To make them some oatmeal." Astrid said with a smile.

A minute later the three that remained upstairs sweat dropped as they heard crashing and screaming from downstairs.

"YOU LET THE WATER BOIL OVER!"

"BLOODY HELL- OW! GET A MOP!"

Matt whimpered.

"YOU CAN'T SERVE THAT! IT'S TOO WATERY!"

"SO? IF THEY CAN EAT YOU SCONES THEY CAN EAT THIS!"

Alfred and Matt practically latched onto Francis.

"Don't let them kill us!"

An hour later the twins were lulled back to sleep with full warm bellies. their caretakers went downstairs and dozed off in the living room watching CNN, just waiting for it all to be over.


	60. Holidays of Folly

Ch. 60 Holidays of Folly

March 20th – 4|20

Alfred was never allowed to celebrate this day. While the plant made others like Matt and Gilbert giggle and airhead…he became paranoid, trigger happy, and cruel as fuck.

It was Cold War America; otherwise called by Matt as: "The Dark One". He was a bastard sadist that Ivan could only barely tolerate; even on a good day.

September 13th – International Chocolate Day 

Due to their sweets popularity; Vash, Feliciano, Romano and Bella (Belgium) recruited help to prepare for this day. While they were surprised that Alfred did not eat a lot of them (we have a lot of chocolate related days back home) he was very talented at making chocolate related recipes.

Especially if they put that giant chocolate castle that Matt, Kiku, and he created into consideration.

**I looked it up Belgium, Switzerland, and Italy are said to have the best chocolates in the world. **

September 19th – Talk Like a Pirate Day 

They should have known something was up when Alfred invited several Nations to New Orleans, with the requirement of being dressed like pirates.

They should have known when they saw three beautiful pirate ships in the harbor with two coast guard patrol boats nearby, and Alfred standing nearby with three captain hats on a trunk labeled 'Pirate Treasure'.

They should have known that it would have ended in a big fight after Arthur, Antonio, and Francis won the right to be captains of their ships in the random drawing.

And of course they should have known that it would have been fun and a complete pain in the ass.

October 31st – Halloween (All Hallows Eve)

After finding out that the North American siblings were Supernatural hunters; Arthur wondered if ever did scare Alfred in their little contests. So he of course asked. Alfred would just laugh and tell him while it was not really scary, it was funny and he just pretended that for once those things were not dangerous.

Then as an added bonus Alfred helped him scare the **entire** UN by created a _very_ realistic haunted castle. It was a good thing that they set aside one wing just for the younger nations or they would have been a lot more screaming.


	61. Halloween

Ch. 61 Halloween

9foxgrl

"Whose bright idea was it to have a giant party this year, and not let me or Arthur host it?" Alfred groaned as he and Matt got ready for the annual Halloween party.

"Every nation did."

"Ah."

"No one wants a repeat of your Halloween Castle of Horror."

"No fair."

Alfred suddenly grinned evilly. "Matt…I have an idea."

"Did you hurt yourself?"

"I'm going to ignore that and just tell you my plan for now."

* * *

*Later at the Party*

Astrid looked around as she waited for her brothers to show. She was currently dressed up like a water sprite with a white dress and roman sandals with an illusion of sparkling wings on her back.

"Is something wrong Ms. Astrid?"

"Oh no Toris." Astrid said to Toris and Feliks (dressed as Bonnie and Clyde) as they came by. "It's just. I haven't seen the boys yet, and that usually spells trouble. "

The lights went out and there was the sound of mad cackling.

"Defiantly spells trouble."

There were screams as a masked duo ran in wearing all black with cloaks, and white expressionless masks holding chainsaws. They darted to the center of the dance floor and took a mocking bow.

"Greeting Nations!" the taller one called out. "I am Hate!"

"I am Misery!"

"We are here to wish you a very Happy Halloween!"

"But first!"

"We have a little business to attend to!"

"HIT IT!"

Everyone cringed as a very familiar and annoying song started to play and the duo started to dance.

_Oooh!_

_We're no strangers to love_

_You know the rules and so do I_

_A full commitment's what I'm thinking of_

_You wouldn't get this from any other guy_

Astrid pulled out a gun from under her short skirt and shot at them.

"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU BRATS! NO RICK ROLLS!" She yelled as she chased them out.

**Funny thing yesterday I went with some friends to a haunted house on my college campus. My group was all screaming and I just dragged them along like it was nothing. Then at the end this guy in a skull mask jumps out and I just walk pass him like a Boss!**

**HAPPY HALLOWEEN!**

**And yes, you were just rick rolled on Halloween. **


	62. Works of Literature

Ch. 62 Works of Literature

9foxgrl

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING AN IDIOT?"

"Because you are an idiot. Think about your illiteracy rates."

"I'm not an idiot." Alfred snarled as he sat up. "And besides, I do happen to be ranked number twenty sixth in the world's highest literacy rates!"

"Twilight isn't literature!"

Alfred growled so animalistic that it made Feliciano scream in terror then stormed out of the meeting room. Matt just groaned.

"Why do you guys have to always question his intelligence? In case you forgot his people are responsible for several of the world changing inventions. Or did you forget; the atomic bomb?"

"We didn't forget that, aru!"

"Sure… you _didn't_. And I take it that you haven't seen his library either."

"What library?"

-An Hour Later-

Matt looked around fearfully then waved the nations in.

"He shouldn't be in for a few minutes. We go in, then get the Hell out of here!"

"Why are we breaking in?"

"Because; he locks up his library when guests visit." Matt hissed as they snuck around and down a rarely used hallway then pushed open pair of double oak doors.

The nations gawked at the wall to wall bookshelves filled to the brim with books in varying ages. In the corner, against a ceiling light was a small table next to a comfortable lounge chair with a book laying open.

"What the Hell?"

Arthur looked around and felt so proud of a few shelves dedicated to Shakespeare were closest to the chair; many were well worn from being read repeatedly. A copy of _The Canterbury Tales_ was bookmarked and sitting innocently open to the Wife of Bath's Tale in Alfred's reading chair.

There was a copy of Catcher in the Rye, 1984, and Pride and Prejudice sitting on the table to be read next.

"I'm surprised that there are no teen novels around here." Kiku said looking around and paused. _'Or any mangas.'_

"Like I said, this is his private room." Matt said quietly. "Only he comes in here."

"What are you doing in my house?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Crap."


	63. Shape Shifter

Ch. 63 Shape shifters

9foxgrl

Alfred was bored as he waited for Arthur to hurry up down stairs. He then started to stare at Arthur's cat Captain* lounging in the sun.

Alfred grinned before tapping into his nature magic and shifted into the form of a small cat.

_-Hey Captain!-_

Captain opened an eye, then spazzed when as he saw the new cat wave at him.

–_What the Hell?- _

_-What? It's me America!-_

_-I know that! How did you turn into a cat?-_

_-Magic.-_

_-What did my owner do?- _

_-Nothing! This is all mine!- _

Captain shook his head. _–Well you might want to switch back.-_

_-Why?-_

_-My owner is behind you.-_

Alfred turned and blinked. Arthur stood their staring at the strange cat then screamed as it turned back into Alfred.

"You alright Iggy?" Alfred asked as he helped the Brit up.

"You can shape shift?"

"Only in to animals that I have seen in real life." Alfred said sheepishly. "Please, don't tell anyone, please?"

"Fine…but on one condition."

**-Later-**

Arthur was grinning devilishly as he heard Francis scream as he tried to sneak into his bedroom at night.

Again.

Francis came flying down the stairs with a lion hot on his tail.

"WHY WAS THEIR A LION SLEEPING IN YOUR BED?"

"Ah, I see you've encountered my new security system." Arthur said smugly as the lion walked over to him and sat down at his feet. Arthur just smiled as he ruffled it's mane. "Good job Aslan."

Francis stared.

'Aslan' turned and roared at him, making the Frenchman run out of the house faster than Feliciano in a Ferrari.

"Good work." Arthur said with a cackle as the lion shifted back into Alfred.

"Ha ha! That was fun dude!"

*I don't know what his name is so I guessed.


	64. EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!

Ch. 64 Epic Rap Battles of History!

9foxgrl

_A/N: Because it had to be done! Favorite one! _

_Here's the link for the original song on Youtube if you want to listen it!_

_/watch?v=1_hKLfTKU5Y_

Alfred & Matt 

**Feliciano & Lovino **

Everyone was taking a well-deserved break in the dining hall when Gilbert ran in with a microphone, and a boom box. Behind him were the N. America and Italy twins looking happy. They were wearing casual clothes, but the twins had on their favorite hoodies with the hoods up a pair of pilot goggles on and the twins had heavy chains around their necks.

Which is scary, considering Lovino was not ever happy unless it involved tomatoes.

"Bruder…what are you doing?" Ludwig asked as his brother plugged the boom box in.

"EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!" Gilbert yelled then pointed at the Alfred and Matt. "THE WRIGHT BROTHERS vs- (points at the Italy twins)THE MARIO BROTHERS! BEGIN!"

The twins tossed back their hoods.

Were The Wright Brothers And There Cant Be No Other!

We Dont Wanna Cause Trouble, Are You Looking For Your Lover?

Cause Your Princess Is In Our Castle Now!

Yeah, She's Gone!

Stayed Up All Night!

Playing Donkey Kong!

Before Us People Used To Only Fly In Balloons!

You Think Were Scared Of Two Idiots Addicted To Shrooms?

You Shoulda Woulda Coulda Come To Lose An Extra Life!

So Just Da-Da-Da-Da-Da-Da Back Down In Your Pipe!

**Itsa Me, Mario!**

**And Luigi Mother (Coin Sound)**

**Why Dont Just Get Back To Your Bi-plane And Make Out Wid Each other?!**

**Look At These Two! Their Lives Musta Been Horrible!**

**Two Dorky Dudes, Named Wilbur and Orville!**

**Ya Spent ALL Your Time On One Machine? SHEESH!**

**If You Wanted To Fly, You Shoulda Just Eaten This Leaf!**

**You Should Eat Something Anyway, Just Look At You, So Skinny!**

**You Might Fly Like A Hawk, But You Fight Like A Kitty!**

Alfred and Matt took off their goggles in unison and mockingly flipped them off.

We Dont Need To Fight! Were The Fathers Of Flight!

Representing North Carolina, AIGHT!

We'll Be Pressing All Your Buttons Like Were The Controller!

Conquer Every Level Of Your 2D Scroller!

You Talk A Lot Of Trash, But Lemme Tell Ya Something!

We're Gonna Beat You So Fast Just Like Were Holdin Down The B Button!

Lovino and Felicaino took a step forward made a fist.

**We're Serving Up An 8-Bit Fist, Made To Order!**

**That'll Beat You Off The Back Of Your Own Stupid Quarters!**

**Like POW! How You Like Me Now?**

**Spit Flames Out Our Mouth Like Our Name Is BOWWW**

**SER! (Mushroom Sound) You'll Get Pummeled!**

**Your Gonna Wish You Never Stumbled Outcha Lil Wind Tunnel!**

**We Been Droppin Bomb-Ombs Since We Started This Song!**

**Sorry Wright Brothers, This Time You Chose WRONG!**

"WHO WON? WHOSE NEXT? YOU DECIDE! EPIC~RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!"


	65. Caffeine

Ch. 65 Caffeine

9foxgrl

Alfred was worried as he watched his brother drink another cup of coffee, third one in two hours, sixth one since he came over. Ever since Matt found out that they sold maple flavored coffee in Boston he bought several bags before the meeting and was downing it like water.

'_I should never have taken him shopping with me.'_ Alfred thought as Matt finished that cup and poured another. He if he didn't do something soon; they would have another Nordic incident on their hands.

"Mattie…don't you think you should lay off the coffee now?" Alfred asked easily.

"No, why? After all you drink more than this every day." Matt said quickly before turning back to his coffee. "Especially last night."

'_Well yeah, I had to stay up and see who won in the elections and prepare to potentially meet a new boss.'_ Alfred thought. _'Hopefully this time Congress will get off their butts and actually be productive before we end up like Hercules*.'_

"…Yeah in one _day_ not hours and I have a high tolerance for caffeine. Just take it easy on the stuff bro." Alfred pointed out. _'I drink more coffee and coke then you do.'_

"But it's so good!" Matt cheered. "Not as good as Timmies though! I should get them to include this flavor!"

Alfred did the math in his head. _'Canadians + highly caffeinated maple coffee = XXXXFATALITYXXXX'_

Alfred ran out of the room then locked Matt in, and ran to his fallout shelter. He was discovered there by the rest of the G8 after he missed the meeting he was supposed to host.

"What are you doing?"

"Hiding." Alfred said with a twitch as he hugged a ratty stuffed rabbit and began to rock back and forth.

"Why?"

"Mattie drank A LOT OF COFFEE and is now locked up in my house."

"We checked your house, he wasn't there, aru."

Alfred screamed. "OH NO! HE ESCAPED! ITS Y2K ALL OVER AGAIN!"

Meanwhile…in Vermont

_*giggle*_

Back in Massachusetts

Alfred jumped as his phone rang. "Y-yes-?"

"Sir, we just received a report from Vermont; an entire truck load of their new Canadian maple coffee was stolen."

Alfred fainted.

*Alfred is referring to the strikes going on in Greece that are said to potentially going to bankrupt the country.


	66. America's Ringtones

Ch. 66 America's Ringtones

9foxgrl

"Ooh look, Alfred left his phone all alone." Francis said as he found the I phone charging in the Nation's office. Unable to resist he looked at the contact information. He couldn't help but stare at some of the custom ringtones the American had chosen.

Arthur – _He's A Pirate_ – Pirates of the Caribbean

**Well that one fits him.**

Astrid – _Run Devil Run_ – Ke$ha

Francis – _Bed intruder_

**What is this one? I must look it up.**

Hercules – _I'm a Kitty Cat_

Ivan – _Panzerkampf_ – Sabaton

Matt – _Canadian Please_ - Andrew Gunadie & Julia Bentley

**This is that song Mathieu is always singing. **

Vash – _Bang! Bang! Have a Nice Dream_ – Lotus Juice (Soul Eater Soundtrack)

Yao –_ Hello Kitty Theme Song_

"Francis what do you think you're doing going through phone?" asked a cold voice right behind him.

Several Nations looked up in surprise and confusion as Francis' screams echoed through the offices of the UN building.

A/N: _Yes, I will make one for Matt. If you have song ideas for individuals let me know. _


	67. Canada's Ringtones

CH. 67 Canada's Ringtones

9foxgrl

(**The choice for Alfred came by popular demand**)

You would think that after the incident with Alfred at the UN that Francis should had known better then to go through another person's contact information. Especially Matthew when he was downstairs watching the hockey playoffs.

But as with several drunk/tipsy men; they don't know better.

Alfred – _American Idiot_ – Green Day

Arthur – _Candy_ – Rob Williams*

Feliciano - _L'talia di Piero _- Simone Cristicchi

Felix - _Pechowy jak Polak_ - Big Cyc

Francis – _Je Veux Te Voir_- Yelle

Im Yong Soo – _Gangnam Style_ - PSY

Ludwig – _Mitternacht_ - E Nomine

Natalya – _Paparazzi_ – Lady Gaga

With a drunken giggle Francis changed the regular ringtone for the Canadian's alarm clock then stumbled back to the guest room to pass out.

The next day 0600

Matt was sleeping peacefully in his bed when his alarm went off. But instead of Canadian Please he got:

_Oo-ooh-ooh, hoo yeah, yeah_

_Yeah, yeah_

_Yeah-ah-ah_

_Yeah-ah-ah_

_Yeah-ah-ah_

_Yeah-ah-ah_

_Yeah, yeah, yeah_

_7am, waking up in the morning_

_Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs_

_Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal_

_Seein' everything, the time is goin'_

_Tickin' on and on, everybody's rushin'_

_Gotta get down to the bus stop_

Across the border hundreds of miles away Alfred (and Arthur who was staying over) was awoken by enraged strangled screaming coming from the North. They both sped walked out to the north side of the house still wrapped in blankets.

"What the bloody hell was that?" Arthur blinked as the screaming finally ended after ten minutes.

"Either a wet cat strung up on a frozen flag pole-or someone played a Rebecca Black song around Mattie."

Arthur blinked. "How do you know what a wet cat strung up on a frozen flag pole sounds like?"

"…some days in Texas were more interesting than others."

Before the conversation could continue there was another round of screaming.

"That one I know." Arthur said confidentially.

"A goat after five minutes of being in a red pepper patch?"

"No, a hung over frog being strangled."

*I know that you would all think Beatles; but this song is currently number one on the UK music billboard 


	68. Miscommunication

Ch. 68 ~ Miscommunication

9foxgrl

_Inspired by 91RedRoses_

**Ottawa, Canada – Prime Minister's Office - 2049 Hours **

Matt was talking with his boss Stephen Harper over some issues the cabinet was discussing when he received a call from Gilbert.

Matt held the phone to his ear. He winced at all the static. "Gilbert are you using a cell phone? I can't hear you!"

"_Birdie! We're gonna_ *static*_Gang_*static* _rap_*static* _Alfred_! _Tomorrow_!"

Matt's eyes went wide as he processed what he heard then screamed "_What_?"

And just like that the call ended.

Matt stared at his phone. A feeling over bearing protection pulsed through him.

Then came the anger.

Matt's boss jumped as the Nation snarled like an angry bear then crunched his cell phone in his bare hands. The only word he could hear from the conversation was 'Alfred'.

"Is something wrong Matthew?" the Harper asked as the personification of Canada retrieved a tommy gun and a war hammer from behind a painting he forgot was there. He did his best not to scream in horror at the deranged murderous look in the man's eyes as he turned to look at him.

"I…am going to kill them. No one messes with _my_ family."

After the enraged Nation left the Prime Minister hastily called the White House then scheduled a quick vacation to see his family. He didn't know what was going to happen; but there was no way in Hell he would be there to see it.

* * *

**NEXT DAY- U.N. MEETING – WASHINGTON D.C., U.S.A - 0700 Hours**

Gilbert was the first to arrive at the meeting, he thought he would get there at the same time as Alfred but the American wasn't there. An hour later all the other Nations except America had arrived.

Arthur was worried and attempted to call him.

-_The number you have dialed is no longer in service. Please hang up and try again._-

"His phone is out of service." He said worriedly.

"So much for our plans for today."

"Man that sucks."

"So where is he?"

"I know."

Everyone turned to Matthew was grinning…and wearing a fedora like some kind of Mob boss.

"Where is he Birdie?"

"I won't tell you." The Canadian said before pulling out a tommy gun from his suit jacket. (Seriously how did he get it in there?) "Because I want to _**kill**_ you all first."

Several Nations paled.

"Mathieu?"

"Birdie?"

"How dare you think of gang raping my brother?" Matt asked as his expression turned murderous. It was then many remembered that he was a strong force in WWII.

"WHAT?"

"We weren't going to-"

They were silenced by a round of gun fire that barely missed them.

"_No one messes with my family._"

**Alfred – Location – Unknown City, North Carolina, U.S.A - 1030 Hours **

Alfred had to admit he was confused right now. He was supposed to be hosting a meeting in the U.N. building right now; instead he was snatched in the middle of the night by the Secret Service, CIA, and U.S. Marshals and flown to a safe house (well more like an apartment) in a small city in North Carolina.

They trashed his phone (_It was the freaking new i phone man!)_ and forbid him from contacting anyone on the outside until the threat was eliminated.

From what he got in the phone call with Obama; his brother had intercepted a message about a threat on his life from an unknown Nation and he was being taken to a secure location for his own safety.

After hours of boredom he managed to convince his security detail to let him at least walk down the block to a Mayberry ice cream shop.

They were halfway down when he saw the news reel of the other Nations being chased through Times Square being played on some TVs in a pawn shop window. It looked like something from _Fast and the Furious_ or one of those other action movies.

"Man, they get all the fun." He commented to one of the Navy Seals escorting him.

The team looked at each other with a confused and somewhat amused look but followed the Nation.

**The Actual conversation**

"We're gonna do a Gangnam dance contest then have a rap battle against Alfred! See Ya Tomorrow!"


	69. Looking Glass

Ch. 69 Looking Glass

9foxgrl

_Inspired by Fruity-Dragonfly_

"Hello Alfred, hello Matt-hew..?"

"What's wrong Arthur?" asked Yao as he looked towards where the Englishman was starring.

It was Alfred & Matt…

And yet it was not Alfred and Matt.

Alfred (his hair was brunette and had brown eyes with red tinted sunglasses on his head) was sitting next to Matt (who was dress like the Mounted Police but with sunglasses and his hair tied back). They seemed to be a bit emerged in a round of Grand Theft Auto.

Both looked up as the rest of the visiting Nations came into Alfred's living room.

They gawked at the two lounging on the sofa like lazy cats.

"Sup?"

Alfred threw a look at Arthur then cackled and picked up a bat with nails sticking out and blood stains. "So that's _their_ Iggy? We got the short end of the stick Bro!"

"Shut up." Matt snapped at him. "What are you bastards doing here?"

Arthur's right eye twitched. "…We were to meet you here remember?"

"…"

"…"

"Let's kill them." Alfred said with a psychotic laugh.

Matt seemed to agree and started to advance to them with a bloody hockey stick.

Feliciano cried as he ducked behind Ludwig.

"What the Hell you two?"

"We leave you alone for a few minutes and you get into trouble?"

The real Alfred and Matt came in holding a mirror wrapped in brown paper.

"Other me, leave Arthur alone." Alfred snapped.

"Aw…can't I keep him?"

"No!" Alfred snapped as he grabbed his alternate half.

"Do you have the mirror?" Other Alfred asked.

Alfred held up the small oval mirror, careful not to let anyone's reflection be caught in it. "You're lucky that it was in the Smithsonian archives."

"Oh! Maple lover! Get over here so we can go home!"

"Shut up bastard before I blow your brains out." Snapped Other Matt as he turned away from Yao and Ivan.

"You and what army, or should I say what moose?"

The real twins rolled their eyes and turned the mirror on their alternate selves who in a flash disappeared. They then turned to their guests in annoyance.

"Never read anything by Lewis Carroll in front of a mirror. It just screams trouble."

"And don't think of trying it! They're all loonier then Bugs Bunny!"

"Just who were _they_?" Francis screamed.

"_What_ were they?" Yao added.

"To put it simply; our alternate selves."

* * *

_**2p! World**_

Alfred and Matt flew out of a mirror in Alfred's house and crashed into the floor.

"Those asses!"

"Get off me you fat American!"

"Shut up Maple lover!"

"'_ello_ my duckies, where have you been off to today?"

The brothers looked up to see a man who reminded them of the Mad Hatter wearing a pink sweater vest and bright blue bow tie. His pink and blue glowing eyes seemed to pierce through the darkness of the room. He had a Cheshire cat grin on his face as he sat in his lounge chair with a tray of cupcakes beside him.

"Hello Arthur, why are you in my house…again?" Alfred asked aloud, he then whispered to his brother. "I thought I changed those locks."

"You did." Matt whispered.

Arthur tsked as he took a drink of tea. "Now poppet if I told you then all the fun would be gone. Now then … do you lads fancy a cupcake?"

**Sorry, but i don't know much about 2p! other than them being psycho killers. **


	70. Twinkies

Ch. 70 Twinkies

9foxgrl

_Inspired by Dark Inu Fan _

"NO!"

"ALFRED!"

"THEY'RE MINE!"

"ALL OF THEM?"

"MINE?"

"What the Hell are you two doing?" Astrid snapped as she peeked into the attic where her brothers were yelling. Her eyes widen at the sight of the box piles of bright yellow pastries that they were fighting over.

"STOCKING FOR THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE!" they screamed in unison.

Astrid picked up one of the packages, stared at it then stared at her brothers. "…with Twinkies?"

"MY TWINKIES!"

"YOU CAN SPARE A BOX!"

"…Is everything in here for that?" Astrid said looking around. Gallons of water, ammo, guns, machetes, flashes...

"YES!"

"…"

"…Then why is Arthur in there?" Astrid said pointing to the Englishman tied and gagged to a chair in the corner.

"_Mphf_!" Arthur yelled into his gag as he tried to get free.

"Do you see him surviving a zombie apocalypse without help? It saves me a plane trip." Alfred asked. "HEY! GIVE IT BACK MATT!"

"NEVER!" Matt screamed taking a pile of Twinkies with him.

Astrid just sighed as she ungagged Arthur.

"Those wankers watch _Zombieland_ last night."

"Again? Damn it."


	71. Playboy

Ch. 71 Playboy

9foxgrl

_Inspired by Quiet Harmony-chan_

_1953_

"Alfred?"

"Yeah?"

"What's this?"

Alfred looked up from his work to the magazine his brother was holding. He was staring at it with large round eyes. "A magazine."

"I know know that! I mean…what magazine is this?"

"_Playboy_, Hugh sent me an advance copy of the first print." Alfred said without a care. "His buddies are considering a bunny for their logo."

"…and this is _legal_?"

"Yes Mattie." Alfred said with a roll of his eyes.

"But…it's porn!" Matt cried. He wondered if his brother's Puritan roots had finally decayed away or his French influence had finally overwhelmed him.

"How is this any different from the statues of naked people Hercules has? Or those erotic novels that Kiku and other nations print? I;ts freedom of the press dude."

"Others are going to give you Hell for this."

"Horse hockey, if anything it will give them the guts to do it themselves."

"When I see it I'll believe it."

Matt would eat those words when in 1965 the United Kingdom began publishing _Penthouse_.


	72. Killer Rabbit

Ch. 72 Killer Rabbit

9foxgrl

Whoever though it would be a good idea to go on a team building trip in the woods was an absolute loon. The G8 remembered the last trip to Michigan; although they felt more comfortable that this time it took place in the forests of Wales (where the most dangerous thing was either a forest animal or a dragon) so naturally William tagged along to keep them out of trouble.

They had just started setting up camp when Alfred and Matt caught sight of the white rabbit while gathering some firewood with Manabozo and Nanuq. The spirits screamed for their charges to run.

The twins remembered what that rabbit was, screamed and ran back to camp then high tailed it up the tallest pine tree like squirrels.

"Run!"

"It's right behind us!"

"It's the monster of the Cave of Caerbannog !" Alfred screamed from the tree tops.

Arthur and his brother William turned. They paled when they saw the rabbit (they saw what it did to Alistair in the Middle Ages) then screamed as well before scurrying up the closest tree to them. Feliciano followed not knowing why, just that it was scary.

"Aww what a cute _lapin_!" Francis cooed.

"It's not cute!"

"It's evil!"

"It's a killer!"

"It's got a vicious streak a mile wide!"

"That's no ordinary rabbit! It's evil!"

"Ve~! Ludwig!"

The G8 looked up to their friends with amusement. Kiku took out his video phone and started recording. Ivan moved towards the rabbit with his pipe, only to have it jump at him and start trying to rip him apart!

Ludwig and Yao tried to pry it off only to have it redirect it's attack to them. Francis and Kiku (still recording) took the opportunity to climb into the trees as well.

"HOLY CRAP!"

"IT'S GONNA KILL HIM!"

"Ve~! What do we do?" Feliciano cried.

"We'll not risk another frontal assault. That rabbits' dynamite!" Arthur yelled.

"So how do we kill it?"

"We need the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch!" the U.K. brothers yelled in unison.

"Why couldn't we have run into a dragon?" Matt muttered to his brother.

"I know, that would have been a lot safer."


	73. I'm Amelia!

Ch. 73 ~I'm Amelia!

9foxgrl

_Inspired by DevilChild101 _

_Warning there will be a touch of UKUS in this chapter! Ignore if you do not like. _

_No flames please, because I warned you._

* * *

'_I should have seen this coming!' a_ blonde woman sniffed as she walked through Central Park before collapsing onto a bench facing a large fountain. _'I should have known putting hot sauce in Astrid's fruit smoothie would have bit me in the ass.'_

"Excuse me miss, are you alright?"

The woman looked up to see a familiar blonde British man with thick brows looking at her with concern and…was he blushing?

"Oh yes, I'm fine." She replied as wiped the tears threatening to come out of her eyes.

The man smiled. "I'm Arthur."

"Amelia, but my friends call me Em."

"Why were you crying?"

"Oh I may have accidentally angered my older sister and brother." Amelia sniffed.

"How could a lovely young woman like you anger anyone?"

Amelia just smiled. "Flattery will get you nowhere in life good sir."

"Ah, but it did make you smile." Arthur said with a laugh. "After all, what kind of gentleman would I be if I allowed for a lady to be in distress?"

Amelia stood up and looked at him dead in the eye.

"Are you a natural flirt Arthur or is this a British trait?"

"Care to find out love?" Arthur asked getting close to her. A chime from Amelia's jacket broke them apart.

Amelia cursed as she read the text from Matt saying the spell was wearing off in ten minutes so she needed to get home ASAP.

"Oh, I need to get going now." Amelia huffed in disappointment. "Sorry Arthur."

"I understand Em." Arthur said giving her a quick peck on the cheek before she started to leave, at the fountain she paused and waved to him.

"Bye Iggy!"

Arthur blanched in shock, freezing mid wave, as he watched the woman leave.

'_She called me Iggy…but no one calls me that except...OH BLOODY MARY AND VIRGIN ELIZABETH…THAT WAS ALFRED?'_

Arthur paused in his tirade. '_She was quite a looker…I wonder if that form is permanent.'_

Meanwhile Amelia was running down the street cursing her girl hormones for giving in to that British accent.

* * *

_I know I didn't put this in my last chapter, but a late Happy Thanksgiving to everyone. I hope you all had a good day and a safe Black Friday for all you competitive shoppers._


	74. Lullaby

Ch. 74 Lullaby

9foxgrl

_Inspired by Dark Inu Fan _

Song: _Lullaby (the Divorce Song) _by Stephen Lynch (_**I tweaked the lyrics a bit**_) & Youtube video: [_APH Lullaby] _by cutepiku (/watch?v=yInsr1c_1Ns)

* * *

Matt was worried as Francis stumbled into his bedroom smelling of alcohol and his shirt rumpled.

'_He must have been denied by someone at the brothel again.'_

Nanuq manifested in his small form as Francis began to sing.

_Hush little boy_

_Sweet baby don't cry_

_Tonight_

_Daddy is here and he'll sing you a soft lullaby_

_Tonight_

_Why can't it all be like it was before?_

_How can I explain why mommy's not here anymore?_

_Cause daddy likes porno and ten dollar whores_

_Daddy gets wasted and robs liquor stores_

_Daddy likes rubbing against little boys on the ship_

Matt's eyes grew wide and tried to hide under his blankets. Nanuq began to growl.

_I think that's why mommy left us_

_Mommy left us_

_Hush little boy_

_There is no reason to fret_

_Tonight_

_Don't mind the smoke_

_Daddy just wants to forget_

_Tonight_

'_Astrid! Nanuq! Some one please…Save me!'_ Mattie screamed in mind as Francis staggered closer and ripped his blankets off his bed.

_Soon it will all be like it was before_

_Any minute she will walk through that front door_

_But daddy plays poker and drinks lots of beer_

_Then he wants sex that involves mommy's rear_

_Daddy has sores on his naughty parts oozing with puss_

_I think that's why your mommy left us_

_Please don't cry_

_I swear I'll try_

_To be here by your side_

Matt started crying as Francis moved to pick him up. The Frenchman didn't seem to notice the bear trying to bite his arm off.

_Right after daddy gets home from the bar_

_Visits his bookie_

_And steals a new horse_

_He'll ride to the brothel_

_And if daddy plays his cards right_

_He'll bring home your new mommy tonight_

CLANG!

Francis fell as he was hit upside the head by a thick iron skillet. Matt looked up to see Astrid looking pissed. Shunkaha growled at Francis as she passed by.

"That's it, I'm telling Alfred to give Arthur the motivation to get custody of you before this happens again!" Astrid snapped.

Shunkaha barked and a pack of wolves came in then dragged Francis out into the snow.

"Can you stay tonight big sister?" Matt whimpered as he pulled her dress.

"Fine, but I'm locking the doors."

* * *

(9foxgrl: Sorry Mattie)


	75. Rebel

Ch. 75 Rebel

9foxgrl

Alfred just sighed as he looked at his former mentor with the annoyance that he was sure that only a disgruntled parent with a rebellious teenager should feel.

'_At least I didn't have to deal with the pirate.' _

First there was planking.

_Fell over him a lot. Sneaky bastard_

Batmanning.

_Well…that was kind of cool. Seeing him hang upside down in the parking lot…scared Francis. _

Owling

_Just creepy… _

Knit bombing sections of London.

_No phone booth should be that colorful…_

"Milking Arthur, really?"

Arthur just spat out a mouthful of milk. He was drenthched head to toe and an empty four gallon jug laid empty at his feet. "What? I'm a rebel?"

Alfred just face palmed.

'_Now my citizens are going to do this…man I feel old.'_

Source: The Guardian (_Milking: an udderly bizarre student trend) It's a paper in the UK _


	76. World's Youth

Ch. 76 World's Youth

9foxgrl

The world has strange ways of protesting silently. Especially the world's youths.

Heads turned the day that Kiku came to a world meeting with outrageously spiked neon blue and yellow hair and wearing outrageous clothing (trench coat, leather pants and a belly t-shirt) that showed a good amount of skin as well as a coiled dragon tattoo on his stomach. Several Nations freaked out and believed that their water had been spiked or the normally calm Japanese man was on something like LSD or PCP.

* * *

Arthur was deemed to have some of the strangest trends among his citizens. There was the time Francis had to bail _him_ out of jail after he yarn bombed a phone booth, a cab, and one of Scotland Yard's prison wagons.

Then there was the owling. Again weird and terrifying because he scared the hell out of Alfred who found him perched on his house's inner stairwell, garden wall, and then their hotel balcony; all the time with a dead fish eyed look on his face.

(_Alfred: Why always me? )_

* * *

Matt often used his 'invisibility' as a great tool by planking. Tripping people, planking in random places (_aka on top of soda machines, the hood of a moving car, middle of busy hallways, stairwells, etc_…).

Alfred nearly died holding in his laughter when he successfully planked on the heads of two nations in a meeting.

* * *

Alfred was rumored to take the cake. He had the hippie phase were he would wear rose tinted glasses, and psychedelic colors and attempted to preach to others about peace while throwing flowers (_Note: He was not high on anything Thank Maple!). _

There was also the punk stage, emo, gangster, feminine stage (yes he had one!) and various others that made Nations wonder what the Hell was going on in his country?


	77. Snapshots

Ch. 77 Snapshots

9foxgrl

_Inspired by Upsilon Forty-Two_

If you were to look in the North America siblings' family albums you would see a lot of unusual photos. Some that make you wonder how are they are still alive.

The first photo, well really a sketch, depicts the pure innocence of three children dressed like Native Americans sitting together in a meadow.

The second; another sketch shows them standing in ruins of a village, their expressions no longer innocent.

Skipping around you can find photos of the twin brothers in military dress uniforms holding their respected flags. The twins dressed in hockey gear brawling on the ice while their older sister skates serenely behind them.

The brothers (as teens) running from a pack of wolves.

The brothers fighting while a large house burns in the background, their sister, quite angry, edging towards them with an axe.

The sister sitting in a chair while her brothers stand beside her proudly.

Keep on flipping and you can find some of the brothers in their proudest and lowest moments. Their pranks, and various other crazy schemes. Even one they took when they accidentally time travelled to Atlantis.

Battling giant spiders on the moon, and Alfred having a meeting with the leader of Tony's planet, along with various others alien leaders on a floating platform.

The creation of MIB (_Alfred: which does not exist!)_

Astrid with a Night fury dragon and its new hatchlings on the cliff behind her cottage.

Another one of Astrid and Arthur dragging William kicking and screaming from a hidden dragon reserve while Alfred is in the back ground trying to call down a large red dragon.

A few blurry snapshots of the twins trying to pry a very angry Tino and Berwald from Ivan and Astrid in a night club.

Yeah…these are some were only a few of the interesting family snapshots.


	78. Dragon Reserve

Ch. 78 Dragon Reserve

9foxgrl

_In coalition with 91RedRoses with a touch from Ch. 77 Snapshots _

Astrid was rubbing her temples in irritation as she steered the boat with Arthur and William sitting at the bow to the hidden dragon reserve on the land where Michigan and Ontario touched between Lake Superior and Lake Huron.

William had heard from Anderson that Astrid was friends with a _real_ dragon and from there found out about a dragon reserve that they protected. Of course the Welshman wanted to go see for himself.

Arthur (fearing an international incident aka dragon knapping) tagged along.

"There it is." Astrid said as they approached a cove with a small dock. Matt stood there waiting.

"Hey guys!" Matt said with a wave as he grabbed the dock line that Arthur threw over. "Welcome to the reserve."

"Where's Alfred?" Astrid asked as Matt grabbed waved to one of his citizens who worked on the reserve.

"Tending to the nesting dragons. The Swedish Short-snout's eggs just hatched and the Welsh Cadwaladr's looked like they might soon."

William's eyes widen. "A WELSH _RED_ CADWALADR? YOU HAVE ONE?"

Arthur twitched. Ever since one of his knights slayed William's last Welsh Red he had been obsessed with finding another.

"Err…yes…"

William took off running into the reserve like a freight train.

"Bloody Hell, WILLIAM!"

"Hold on, we'll go in style." Astrid said as two shadows dropped out of the sky.

Arthur's eyes widen as he saw what she meant. "Oh bugger."

* * *

William had ran several miles at top speed when he heard several roars and weak chirps. He froze as he came to a deep cove where there were some dragons curled up around a natural hot spring, some had their new hatchlings with them.

His eyes were drawn to a red dragon the size of school bus with a devil like tail curled in a nest watching Alfred add more straw to shield her rust colored eggs from the cold.

While he admired it Arthur and Astrid caught up on Star Wave (Astrid's Night fury) and her mate Moon Dancer. Seeing them Alfred climbed up the slope.

"Hey guys! You're just in time looks like her eggs might hatch soon."

"A dragon…a Welsh dragon!" William practically squealed as he ran towards it.

"No!" Arthur yelled.

"Get away! It' will rip you to shreds!" Astrid yelled.

As William slid down into the cove one of the eggs began to hatch. The dragon looked up as William approached her nest. She roared loudly and spat a ball of fire into the air as a warning.

"Normally I would let the idiot fry, but he might hurt the babies! Alfred! You calm down the mother, Arthur; help me drag you idiot brother out of there before he hurts himself or someone!"

"Right!" Alfred and Arthur said in unison then followed her down the slope.

"Here girl! Easy now!" Alfred said as he waved his hands to get the dragon's attention away from William. "Let's go back to your babies okay?"

Arthur reached his brother first and tackled him to the ground then grabbed his arms Vinland grabbed his jacket and the two began to drag him away.

"Come on! Get your head out of your arse! Do you want to be made into bangers and mash?"

"No! DRAGONS!"

"There you go~ That's a good girl."

"D- dragon!" William bawled as they reached the crest of the slope. Moon Dancer smacked him upside the head with its tail fin. "GAH!"

"Hopefully that smack will make him more cooperative." Astrid deadpanned.

"Not bloody likely."

"I WILL BE BACK MY LOVE!"

"See."


	79. Cunning & Corruption

Ch. 79 Cunning & Corruption

9foxgrl

_Made in collaboration with 91RedRoses. You are funny! How we got from a prank to this...IDK but omg there is some weird stuff in history! _

_Looks back on CH. 45 & 72!_

**After hearing about Alistair's interesting ****obsession**** with sheep, Astrid and Arthur collaborated on a devilish plan.**

The latest world meeting had just been let out as Arthur made his way to his brother Alistair looking apologetic.

"So brother...I have a present for you."

"What?"

Arthur holds up a white bunny. (A TOY BUNNY)

Alistair screams like a little girl then passes out.

"Did anyone get all that on tape?" Arthur asked enthusiastically.

"Got it!" various Nations shouted.

"Is Alistair out cold?" Astrid asked as she arrived holding a folded map.

"Yep." Arthur said giving his brother a light kick.

"Oh... that's too bad~ As an _'I'm sorry for beating you up in front of the world'_ present, I was going to let him go to one of my private sheep farms..."

Alistair got up from his dead faint. "Sheep farms?"

Astrid nodded. "Yes, yes to feed my wolves you see."

"NO! SAVE THE SHEEP!" Alastair yells as he runs out the door.

"Um Sis?"

"Yeah Alfred?"

"Aren't you going to tell him about Black Hoof?

"Who?" the other Nations asked curiously as the twins shuddered.  
"The meanest ram alive." Matt croaked.

"Who can out kick anyone in the NFL or World Cup."

"And makes sure none of Big Sister's wolves attack the lambs.

In the distance the Scot is seen flying over the Atlantic.

"...Oops..."

"Astrid..." Tino said with a warning look to his daughter.

"I honestly forgot!" Astird said trying to give her 'mother' the most innocent angelic look possible.

Arthur then came running back in grinning like a Cheshire cat. "ASTRID! I got a copy of the video made from setting Alastair up to get kicked by that evil ram of yours! It is so great! It got that bloody wanker right in the family jewels! HAH! This was one of the best ideas ever created my dear! Hats off to you."

"Movie night at Arthur's place!" Sarah yelled.

"Get me a copy of that!" Seamus (N. Ireland) yelled.

"Me too!" William yelled.

Alfred looked at Matt with worry.

"Should we tell them that Alastair just ran back to the farm?"

"After movie night." Matt replied.

* * *

Heard from afar Scotland is flying over the Atlantic again.

"WWWWWHHHHHHYYYYYYYYY?" Alistair screamed as he was sent flying again. _'That Black Ram... so feisty and so sexy... oh, the wool on that sexy piece of four-legs!'_

* * *

Back at conference hall

Tino was lecturing a very annoyed Vinland about animal safety and why setting up people to be kick by an evil ram is wrong. No matter how entertaining it is to watch.

"We should not be enjoying watching Astrid get chewed out, should we?" Matt whispered to Alfred as they shared a bag of chips.

"As long as she doesn't catch us, we're fine. Otherwise she may turn us into girls again."

'_I'm being lectured by mother...well...at least I can tune him out.' _ Astrid sighed as she leaned back in her chair.

Arthur giggled as Alistair is sent flying over the Atlantic for the third time.

"Okay, now he's just doing that for fun." Seamus deadpanned.

"Bloody masochist." William sighed.

Alfred and Matt go over and watch as Alistair goes rushing back for a fourth time... only to be sent flying a fourth time.

"He has to be running as fast an Italy to get back here so fast..." Matt said in awe at the lust driven running.

"Arthur... one of your brothers really, really likes dragons and the other is into sheep... Please tell me you aren't doing your unicorns out in the rose bushes behind your house..."

"God no! They would castrate me!"

"Oh thank God I have at least one person on that side of the family who is not into bestiality..."

The U.K. siblings suddenly began to find various parts of the room very mysterious and in need of deep observation.

"Artie... Sarah... Seamus…"

"Freaks, we were raised by animal-loving freaks…" Matt said in horror.

Alfred screamed pointing to the Bad Touch Trio stood laughing "...FRANCIS YOU CORRUPTED THEM!"

"While I may have gained some enjoyment from animal... companionship from time to time, I guarantee they were like this before I had anything to do with it." Francis sniffed in annoyance.

"Oh god, we'll become infected too Al..." Matt gasped in horror.

"We can stay strong Mattie!" Alfred said hugging his brother.

Matt frantically shook his head, near tears of hysteria. "NO! It's too late! Remember ENGLAND SENT THE PURITANS TO YOU!"

"Puritans?" Astrid and the Nordics asked curiously.

"Oh god... you're right Mattie..." Alfred choked before turning to his sister and the Nordics "The Puritans for all their rep could actually be pretty kinky... there was this one guy who had sex with like, ten different barnyard animals..."

Alfred stopped, his eyes widen and he turned as white as a ghost. "Oh Founding Fathers! He was trying to corrupt my sexual tastes when I was STILL A CHILD!"

Alfred then curled with Matt into a little ball of fear and disgust and started bawling.

"...Arthur... you have a five second head start." Astrid whispered coldly.

"Bugger..." Arthur whispered before he jumped out the fifteenth window and deployed a Union Jack parachute before making a landing into his Rolls Royce and took off.

"Crap, I forgot he had MI6 training." Astrid snarled.

Alfred & Matt were still crying and singing 'Rock a Bye Baby' to each other in their various Native American languages.

"Okay, Father? Dad? Could you and the rest of the Nordics take care of Al and Matt? I need to go hunting for a little perv that corrupted my baby brothers. And you guys are good at calming them down." Astrid growled like a feral wolf.

"Don't worry dear, we'll take care of the twins. Just try to be home for supper after you are done playing hide and seek with you little friend. I'm making one of your favorite dishes!" Tino cheered.

"Okay Dad!" Astrid said before whistling and a giant wolf appeared beside her. She leapt on wolf's back and released a battle cry worthy of her Viking heritage before charging out the window and onto the street below.

Tino shook his head. "Oh kids today! So much energy. Remember when we were like that Berwald?"

Berwald nodded as he picked up the twins "Y's."

"Ve~ that wolf looked like the one Grandpa Rome used to share his bed with." Feliciano said thoughtfully.

Hercules nodded in agreement.

Francis, Romano, and Antonio's eyes grew huge. Kiku and Ludwig looked at him in shock.

"OMGWTFBBQ?" several Nations screamed.

"...what is wrong with you people, aru?"

"Western nations are so strange..." Kiku whispered, temporarily trying to ignore his own animorphic liking.

"It is not weird to be "special friends" with animals! Grandpa Rome showed me and Lovi all about it! Right Lovino?"

"Chigi! I thought we had agreed to never EVER talk about that again."

"Ve... but even Ludwig likes to have special time with dogs..."

"NEIN NEIN NEIN! I AM NOT A PERVERT!"

"Keskeske!" Gilbert laughed. "Oh course not bruder!"

"Gilbird."

"DON'T GO THERE. WHAT WE HAVE IS PURE, NOT LIKE YOU AND YOUR MAGAZINES!"

A/N: I looked it up; Zoophila or bestiality has been going on for a long time. From myths & folklore (Greek myth: Leda & the Swan) to the Middle Ages and beyond. It was apparently a death sentence in medieval Europe to commit bestiality; for both the human and beast. The idea of bestiality was a popular motif in Renaissance art and in Greek art and myths. It was also used as a way of sadism and torture in ancient Roman games.

It is illegal in several countries folks. 

p.s this story is not to offend anyone, and if I did I'm sorry. 


	80. Cram Sessions

Ch. 80 Cram Sessions

9foxgrl

"Al?"

"Nngh?" Alfred grunted as he barely glanced up from a stack of papers that were covered in complex algorithms.

"Where are my notes on Chi Squares?"

"Your binder I guess?"

Matt rustled through the papers and shouted in joy as he found it.

"Okay so I just need to…root square this…" Matt groaned as he realized he did his work wrong and started over.

"…Remind me again why we are studying for a degree in Statistics?" Matt asked.

"Because our bosses think that if we're able to do more complex math then our economies will get better to handle." Alfred replied as he double checked his numbers.

"…Damn it! How can you stand this?"

Alfred looked up in annoyance. "Because; this isn't the first time that I've been sent by my boss to get a freaking college degree."

"…Who was the first?"

"George."

"-Washington?"

"I had to study under Ben and John for years. The Founding Fathers wanted me to be intellectual."

"Then would it kill you to act like it?"

"Shut up. If I start acting smart they are going to freak and think I'm sick all the time. I got my Advance Cal exam tomorrow and you got your Intro Stats final."

"Maple."


	81. Professor pt 1

Ch. 81 Professor

pt.1

9foxgrl

Arthur was very tempted to smack Francis upside the head for the fourth time as the group made their way to their introduction of engineering class. Their bosses along with the rest of the G8 (minus America) had decided that they needed a refresher class in new age technology.

After some work they were given the opportunity to attend a semester at Princeton and live in an apartment off campus.

They found their classroom (after Ivan nearly scared the Hell out of a freshman getting directions). They took seats closest to the front; Ludwig had to drag Feliciano who was crying after looking at the first chapter of the textbook. Matthew (who had just left Economics) slammed his head down on the table.

"Hello." A girl said as she took the seat behind Yao. "New transfers?"

"Yes."

"You're lucky then. The Professor who teaches this class is supposed to be really popular in the science department."

"Really?"

"Yeah, up until two years ago he worked in the English department teaching British and World Literature. But then the board needed a new professor for this department."

'_Well, at least we know he's not an idiot.' _Arthur thought as the door to the Professor's office opened and he stepped out.

"Good morning everyone; I'm Dr. Jones. Welcome to introduction to Engineering."

Jaws dropped.


	82. Professor pt 2

Ch. 82 Professor

Pt. 2

9foxgrl

"Chernobyl, the _Challenger, _New Orleans Levees, Hindenburg, the Interstate 35 Bridge in Minneapolis." Alfred said as he clicked through a power point showing the structures and objects in their prime state. He paused then looked around his full classroom. "Can anyone tell me what all these have in common?"

The girl sitting behind Yao raised her hand.

"Ms. Kobuchar?"

"Engineering failures?"

"Correct." Alfred said as he changed the power point to a series of pictures all the structures completely destroy. "A flaw, or a variable that was overlooked caused these disasters to happen. All of which were deadly."

Alfred looked around with a serious expression on his face. One the Nations had not seen in a very long time.

"A majority of you are taking this class in order to enter this field. For these students I want to stress something to you that I want you to remember. When you build, or design a structure always, **always**, remember you will have the lives of people who use it on your hands."

Alfred clicked the power point again to show a blown up image of the _Challenger_ wreckage before starting a news clip that had been filmed live the day the shuttle exploded. After it ended he turned back to his class.

"When you forget to look at your project from every possible angle this can happen. The O rings that were originally made to prevent the fuel in the _Challenger_ from making contact from the heat malfunctioned. The engineers did not properly check the stress factors that each individual O ring was under during takeoff. If they had, they would have seen the great potential of failure."

Alfred ended his presentation then went back to his podium and turned on the lights before he grabbed a stack of papers and began to hand them out. "In this class you will be learning the basic equations that you will need to follow in your projects. Those going for the Graduate program; I highly stress that you keep your textbooks and notes. Here are you syllabi, look over it and make note of test days; they are closer then they appear. So; for homework I want you to read over Ch. 1 through 3 for Wednesday's class. You're dismissed."

While the regular students left for their next class the Nations stayed back to talk to Alfred.

"You're a professor?" Arthur finally shouted as the last student left.

"Yes." Alfred said with a teasing voice as he shut down the computer and motioned for the Nations to follow him to his office. "I have tenure here, MIT, Duke, Virginia Tech, West Point, and at Harvard. Actually I to pull some major strings just to get you guys admitted and into my Introduction class. Making those fake profiles was not fun."

"That was you?" Francis shouted.

"Yup." Alfred said unlocking his office.

The Nations gawked at the three engineering and physics degrees, as well as a doctorate on Alfred's wall behind his desk. There were also some plaques and awards for various projects that he helped with.

"So Mattie, you want to let out your feelings now or later?" Alfred asked looking at his brother.

"I HATE MATH!" Matt screamed, he turned to punch a file cabinet, but Alfred smacked him upside the head.

"Don't break my office. Besides, you are only 30 credit hours from the degree."

"Then why are you taking all those classes anyway, aru?" Yao asked.

"My boss." Matt hissed.

"Mattie, you've _taught_ a math class before."

"Yeah, high school math, but not statistics! There is a reason I don't teach at colleges." Matt hissed demonically as he flopped into a chair.

Alfred shook his head in chagrin.

"So, how many degrees do you have Alfred?" Ludwig asked.

"Umm…I don't know anymore."

"What?" Kiku asked in shock.

"I lost count in 1958."

"EH?"

"What the Hell?"

"What?" Arthur shouted.

"Don't look at me like that! My bosses made it a tradition from me to get a one or two new degrees every time they take office! I've just finished my degree in Advanced Mathematics last May!" Alfred cried dramatically. "Although...I think I've attended every school in my country though."

"You are not going to be lenient with us at all are you comrade?"

"Sorry, no. That would be unfair to my other students." Alfred said with a laugh. He handed the European and Asian nations a campus map and so they would not get lost when they spit up for their individual lessons in hour. Matt had already been at Princeton for a year and knew his way around. "Oh yeah! Your bosses said if you can't pass with a B average they're sending you back to high school. So study hard!"

"WHAT?"


	83. Professor pt 3

Ch. 83 Professor

Pt. 3

9foxgrl

_With a little touch from 91RedRoses and Quiet Harmony-chan_

The semester was nearly over and the Nations were doing their best to keep up with all their work. On top of Alfred's class they were each taking a total of eighteen credit hours. They were stressed, and on the verge of break downs from all the math algorithms to memorize, projects to complete, and essays they had to write. Alfred, to their horror, was a strict professor. He kicked three students out on the second day for paying more attention to their cell phones then the lecture. While he carefully explained the steps in the equations, he did not tolerate slackers.

* * *

Ivan was slightly more relaxed since two of his courses were Russian Literature, and Botany. But he could often be heard chanting '_Kol Kol Kol'_ while heading to his morning classes.

Yao was stressed with his three Marketing classes often heard yelling _'Aiyah'_ while typing away on his computer.

While Kiku was in the middle with his since he was taking some digital art classes.

It took a while for the pressures of college life to hit them. One month into the semester they were awaken at one a.m. to Feliciano threatening to kill his printer with a pencil in a manner that made Ivan proud and Ludwig afraid to share a room with him.

Arthur had accidentally gotten a mild addiction (oh who was he kidding a _serious_ addiction) to coffee after several late nights of studying. He was so strung out the week nearing finals he cussed out his brothers over the phone (He would later find out he had been on speakerphone in a Parliament session).

Matt had an almost permanent aura of malice clinging to him when his days of classes ended.

Ludwig was in a mixture of Heaven and Hell with his many engineering classes, but had gone to Alfred early on for recommendation of a tutor or supplementary reading. Eventually they all had to do the same when they saw their C- average midterm grades (Ludwig had a B- and Matt's was a B+).

Francis was slightly put off that a large fraction of the female students in the math and science departments were more interested in Alfred than him. But he was took occupied with figuring out how to keep his boss from finding out that he currently had a C in International Studies. Unless he got an A in three classes it would stay that way.

Arthur had originally taken Matt's suggestion of working in a study group, but had stopped in October after one particular session.

* * *

_Flashback_

_Arthur had joined three of his classmates (Emma, Jake, and Abby) in the library for a study session before midterms. They had just started on the study packet Alfred had given out when Jack sighed. _

"_Man this is hard! Professor Jones is so tough!" Jake groaned. _

"_I agree; the man is an unreasonable git." Arthur said as he punched numbers into his calculator. _

"_Did I tell you I love your accent?" Emma giggled. _

"_Over thirty times." Arthur said, cautiously edging away from her. _

_Emma just giggled in response. _

"_At least he's hot." Abby said with her usual airy voice. _

"_Yeah, even I wouldn't mind having a piece of that 'hard ass'." Jake muttered under his breath._

_Arthur froze. 'Wait a tick…Aren't Abby and Jake dating?'_

"_I bet he's great in bed…you can tell by his hands."_

"_Yeah….Arthur what are you doing?" Emma asked as Arthur took his physics book and hit himself repeatedly on the head to erase what he just heard. _

_End Flashback_

* * *

"Bloody Hell, I never want to take another math class." Arthur groaned as he flopped onto the sofa. Francis just groaned in agreement as he fell onto the floor. Not long after Ivan came in and headed to fridge for a bottle of vodka to celebrate his last final.

Yao and Kiku soon followed and shoved Arthur aside so they could sit on the sofa. Ludwig and Feliciano arrived last with Matt who swiped Ivan's vodka and took a swig.

"How long until we get the final grades?" Ludwig asked wearily.

"Depends on the professor." Matt groaned.

They all promptly dozed off for a few hours before they were awakened by the doorbell.

"Hey Guys!" Alfred cheered (dressed casually for the first time in months) as he opened the door holding several boxes of pizza. "Congrats on finishing your finals!"

The other Nations just glared at him.

"If you're here to lecture-"

"I'm not." Alfred said setting the boxes down. Seeing Feliciano's look at the boxes (they had debated in January over whose pizza was superior) he added: "It's from an authentic family own Italian pizzeria."

With the gusto of a feral animal Feliciano snatched a box all for himself.

"So when do we get our grades?" Kiku asked as they attacked the food. They had all been too tired to cook breakfast or get lunch that morning.

"Well I've already entered my classes after your exams." Alfred said casually as he reached into his jacket. "So…if Anders and Ziva don't have to make too many double checks….I would say…now."

Alfred showed them a paper with all their overall grades. "I took the liberty of getting them for you."

_Arthur Kirkland: Overall GPA 3.4_

_Feliciano Vargas: Overall GPA 3.3_

_Francis Bonnefoy: Overall GPA 3.1_

_Ivan Braginski: Overall GPA 3.3_

_Kiku Honda: Overall GPA 3.4_

_Ludwig Beilschmidt: Overall GPA 3.5_

_Matthew Williams: Overall GPA 3.3_

_Yao Wang: Overall GPA 3.2_

"YES!" they all screamed and jumped.

"WE PASSED!"

"NO MORE SCHOOL!"

'_Winter break!'_ Matt cried eagerly.

"Actually your bosses wanted to know if you wanted to stay and complete an associate's degree." Alfred said before he winced from the multiple glares. "I'll just tell them no."

* * *

_I swear; my roommates must think I'm nuts for randomly laughing while I type. _


	84. Chocolate Shop

Ch. 84 Chocolate Shop

9foxgrl

_I haven't seen one for Hetalia yet so I had to make one. _

_Inspired by TheParadoxicalOtaku's FMA fanfic Chocoholic Paradise_

* * *

While on vacation in Washington D.C. you decide to indulge your sweet tooth. Going into a candy store you spot a box of chocolates on promotion. Your eyes zone in one the label:

**Great Sweets**

**A Taste of the World**

**Patriot**: An everyday chocolate you can pick up for under a dollar. It comes in a wide variety of flavors and colors.

**Wizard**: An English toffee chocolate that gives you a feeling of nobility and adventure, it's almost magical.

**Lover**: A rich French style chocolate that makes you just want to share it with that special someone. Never consume it at the same time as the Wizard.

**Soldier**: A very official looking chocolate, it's almost intimidating. But under that exterior is a sweet filling.

**Winter**: A large pleasant looking white chocolate with a hint of peppermint that is just explosive in your mouth or your stomach.

**Emperor: **An exquisite chocolate that is popular with the teenage youths for its varying eye catching designs.

**Dragon**: Based on the elegance of the Orient, this chocolate has a rich taste that makes you want more.

**Felix **: A very sweet chocolate that just perks you up on a cloudy day. Very popular with children.

**Canuk**: A sweet chocolate that is often over looked, or mistaken for the Patriot, but the difference is the sweet maple filling.

**Warning: side effects may include the urge to yell "I'm the Hero", "Pasta", laugh perversely, hug polar bears, salute your superiors, see fairies, take pictures of everything, hug kitties and smile creepily for no reason. **

After reading the box you take the box to the register. The cashier flashes you a million dollar smile worthy of a movie star and rings you up. You walk out of the story with a feeling of accomplishment…and for some reason fearful of what's inside the box.


	85. World Tavern

Ch. 85 World Tavern

9foxgrl

_Inspired by Do a Barrel Roll's fan fic Fullmetal Tavern_

"_You know, we've got to do it someday…throw away all the guns and invite the jokers from the north and south in here to a cocktail party…last man standing on his feet at the end wins the war." – Hawkeye M*A*S*H_

* * *

Welcome to the World Tavern where we have hot/sexy bartenders, a rambunctious atmosphere, and a wide variety of drinks that makes you feel like you've gone around the world after one night. Our prized drink menu includes:

**The England:** Served in an appeasing gentlemen's glass this mix of rum and coke can make you loose your inhibitions and feel like a pirate on the high seas with just one glass.

**The Sweden: **A bland looking drink served in a wooden mug, it may look uninteresting but it has a sweet, snappy taste. Goes great with the Finland.

**The Finland**: A cheerful red, perky, and served on the rocks, the Finland is enjoyable for all ages. Especially at Christmas time. But be warned. It will react with a violent punch if served with the Russia.

**The America**: A strong shot that knocks you for a punch the first time around but after that first sip it becomes gentle and loving. The England actually helped to perfect the America.

**The Canada**: This bright red drink can be confused for the America due to it's color. But it's sweet like maple candy and just as popular with the ladies as the France.

**The Prussia:** This beer recipe is a secret family recipe that makes you feel confident and awesome.

**The Roman Empire**: Shoots down your throat like fire, and served on the rocks, this drink is very popular with the ladies.

**The Romano**: A shot of liquor imported from Southern Italy. Is often nicknamed by customers 'The Godfather'

**The France**: This seductive red wine is popular among men and women. It also goes by the nickname '_Lover's Kiss.' _

**The Russia**: It may look sweet and innocent but be warned; this shot of vodka is known to easily overwhelm the hardiest of drinkers.

So take a seat and drink up folks.

* * *

"_The world runs on booze, if we allowed drinks into the UN conference hall, things would get much sooner…When they finally get done comparing notes on who has the best liquor." – Dark Inu Fan_


	86. Graduation Party

Ch. 86 Graduation Party

9foxgrl

_Made with help from 91RedRoses _

Several Nations were in Alfred's backyard enjoying a large party. It wasn't for a treaty, a birthday, or an intervention for once. It was a celebration for Matt graduating from Princeton with Honors.

"So Arthur, were you Dr. Jones "teacher's pet while we were gone?" Francis asked his stuffy friend as they went to get some drinks.

"I have no idea what you're talking about frog." Arthur huffed as he took a cup of punch from Alfred. "In case you forgot I spent a year as an assistant professor for the English Department."

"Really? So no extra '_lessons'_ or '_discussions'_ between colleagues happened the entire year?"

"I hate you, but I'm in awe of that fact that you manage to put quotations around your words so easily."

"Thank you, it's a gift."

"And for your information Francis, I don't play favorites. Engineering is just too important!" Alfred said giving his patented heroic pose.

"Congratulations Arthur, _mon petit lapin_, you lose to a bunch of mathematical equations."

"At least my GPA was better than yours!" Arthur growled.

"That's mainly because Francis went drinking with the co eds and hung out with the sororities more than studying." Alfred muttered.

"Neither of you should be very proud of your accomplishments." Ludwig commented as he came up. "Arthur you had the fridge with those bottled Starbucks coffees in December!"

"Hey let up Ludwig, not all of them can be super smart a work like a machine like you and Mattie."

Matt twitched violently and began to hiss evilly. his body was cloaked by a red aura that made Gilbert jump away.

"I had fun though, Ve~" Feliciano giggled, and then his face darkened. "Except when that PIECE OF TRASH THAT DARED TO CALL ITSELF A PRINTER DECIDED TO DEFY ME! WELL IT LEARNT OF MY WRATH AND IT TREMBLED! TREMBLED!"

Feliciano began to cackle evilly and everyone else slowly inches away from rocking and laughing Italian.

Lovino wiped away a nonexistent tear. "I'm so proud."

"Well...at least he didn't almost blow up the science building." Alfred muttered.

"I was framed!"

"Romano... they caught you trying to get rid of all the chemicals used in the almost explosion and then you tried to say that you were a part of the Italian mafia and that the explosives were for another mafia."

"...It works in Italy." Lovino grumbled.

"Eh? You went to _la universida_?" Antonio asked curiously.

"Yeah, I got my bachelors in Biotechnology." Lovino said with an airy voice as Feliciano finished cackling and was now enjoying a cup of fruit punch.

"At least you waited until after you got your degree."

"I worked hard for that fucking piece of shit degree! No way was I going to lose it for some well-deserved revenge."

"While it is cute that you have a degree, it is not as cute with all the cussing Tomato~"

"SHUT UP SPANISH BASTARD!"

"Guys! Guys! Foreplay. Elsewhere." Alfred yelled.

"Can you help me blow up the math department at Princeton?" Matt asked Lovino.

"Mattie/Matthew! You just graduated!" Arthur and Alfred yelled in unison.

"So? It deserves it!"

"Mattie, I love you. Your my twin and I'm pretty sure some days we share a soul... but if you so much as harm one brick on my precious math department building, I swear to God, you will find yourself "_volunteering_" for my little science projects for the next twenty years!"

"Why not just make him your assistant in that Advanced Calculus class of yours?" Arthur asked, remembering that he was looking for one to replace his last one who had just got a job at Cal Tech.

Alfred darkly laughed. "Iggy I love the way you think!"

"Arthur I will have my revenge. Matt stated calmly with a stoic face and the light playing off his glasses so you couldn't see his eyes."

"This is why I love family time."

"Astrid, when did you get here?" Tino asked as she hugged Matt and handed him a gift bag.

"About the time Squeaky Italy was going on about printers." Astrid replied as Matt unwrapped his new camcorder.

"Squeaky Italy?"

"Astrid doesn't always remember the names of different nations, so she calls N. Italy, Squeaky Italy and S. Italy, Bitchy Italy." Alfred said with a wave.

"I am unimpressed by their seeming fears of everything. Although sometimes Bitchy Italy can be fun when he is a Mafioso."

"Only because he helps you to fight demons." The N. America twins said in unison.

"Either way, congrats on graduating Princeton Matt." Astrid said cheerfully.

"...I want to burn it to the ground."

"I thought we got all that burning shit out of you after 1812."

"Alfred started it!"

"HEY!"

Astrid slapped them both upside the head. "You are both adult-ish people, do not start that."

"I will never grow up!" Alfred yelled in defiance.

Astrid twitched. "Arthur I'll leave _Peter Pan_ here for you to deal with. Come on Matt, the Baltics want to congratulate you."

Astrid gripped her brother's arm and dragged him over to the Baltic nations while Arthur shook his head at Astrid's comments.

"I would advise the bedroom Arthur. More privacy." Francis said getting a nod of approval from Gilbert and Antonio before they walked off.

Arthur blushed a deep red while Alfred once again merrily reminded himself why he did not like to read the atmosphere all the time.


	87. Melodies

Ch. 87 Melodies

9foxgrl

"Fine, let's take a five minute break and then come back." Roderich sighed as their discussion for a way to work on improving the economy crashed…again.

The Twins groaned as they left the meeting hall. They were really getting annoyed by the facts:

_A). No one was listening to them_

and

_B). No one even taking their ideas into consideration._

It was really annoying and giving them headaches.

Matt then had an idea and went to ask Feliciano a question.

5 Minutes Later

"Alright, now is everyone here?"

"Where's Alfred and Matthew?"

"Chigi? Where's my brother potato bastard?" Lovino added.

Before they could continue the sounds of gentle music floated down to the room. Roderich immedietly darted to his music room with the other Nations following curiously. He pushed open the double white doors and was surprised.

Matt and Alfred were in the middle of the room. Matt was at Roderich's piano while Alfred stood behind him with his violin playing a duet. Both looked calm as they played. Both had their eyes closed and did not notice their large audience. Their suit jackets laid by the shelf where Alfred had gotten the violin.

Feliciano was standing by the doors too entranced by the music to even notice them. His eyes were open and on the verge of tears.

The subtle notes of the piano were harmonized by the violin, enchanting everyone listening. Roderich (who normally hated having anyone even touch his piano without permission) was trying to blink away tears.

"_Que enchante."_

"Beautiful."

"What song is this?"

"It's called _Grandfather's Violin._" Kiku whispered in reply.

Feliciano just nodded and leaned against Ludwig as the song started to come to an end.

When the song ended the brothers jumped slightly at the loud applause. They exchanged a small smile before standing side by side and took a bow.

"Incredible."

"You guys were great."

"Can you play more?"

Matt then glanced at Alfred.

"_Le Cygne?_?"

"Sure." Alfred said taking his stance again and waited for Matt began to play the beginning notes before he joined in.

Songs

_Grandfather's Violin_ – Yuki Kajiura

_The Swan_ (_French translation: Le Cygne_) by Camille Saint-Saens


	88. Surprise

Ch. 88 Surprise

9foxgrl

"Ivan, dude, you alright?" Alfred asked the pale Russian as Toris took his jacket.

"You look like you've seen Hell." Matt said.

Ivan was shaking. "I…"

"…You abused Sis?" Alfred asked, with his eyes taking on a devilish glint.

"I'LL KILL YOU!" Matt suddenly yelled whipping out his battle axe from God only knows where.

"_Nyet_!" Ivan yelled. "I…I…"

Matt studied his face before handing his axe to a stunned Eduard.

"Broke up with her?"

"I'LL KILL YOU!" Matt yelled, this time taking out a French sword from…again…God only knows where.

"NYET!" Ivan yelled with wide eyes at the unstable Canadian.

Alfred cautiously took the sword from his brother and laid it in Toris' arms.

"Cheat on her?"

"I'LL KILL YOU!" Matt yelled, now armed with his brother's war hammer.

Alfred took the hammer and handed to Toris who seemed shocked at all the weapons.

"I'm not sure. She was out almost all day yesterday…and when I tried to talk to her…I think I did something to make her cry."

Alfred and Matthew paled. There were no shouts or threats of death, there was just stunned silence.

"…Dear God…"

"He's done the impossible…"

"Is the end nigh..?"

"Next thing you know Francis will declare that he is really a celibate…"

Ivan fidgeted. How did he, one of the greatest (and scariest) Nations who achieve almost everything he put his mind to; accidently hurt his girlfriend?

"So…what should I do?"

Alfred coughed nervously. "Um…well I don't really…"

"..You've got to understand…she's never cried when as long as we've known her…"

"At least in front of us anyway."

The twins fidgeted nervously before turning to their sister's boyfriend.

"Did you forget something important?"

"Like what?"

"Like an anniversary or something?"

"Nyet, that was last week. We went to Moscow."

"Uh…birthday?"

"Al if we forgot that, we would be dead."

"Right…"

The twins looked at each other and had a whispered argument before turning to Ivan.

"Go talk to her."

"Eh?"

"Just do it."

"If anything you will at least find out what is going on."

Ivan hesitated and walked upstairs to the guest room where Astrid was. A few minutes later they heard a loud thud.

"She killed him." Alfred gawked as he and Matt ran upstairs and found Ivan sprawled on the floor unconscious with Astrid staring at him from the bed with a confused and uncertain look.

"What did you tell him?" Matt asked curiously.

Astrid looked away and said in a barely audible voice. "…That he was going to be a father."

The Twins screams echoed across the world.

**A/N: This might be a story in itself in the future. But if someone else wants to run with it, go for it.  
**


	89. Crocodile Tears

Ch. 89 Crocodile Tears

9foxgrl

Inspired by 91RedRoses

"YOU ARE SUCH A RECKLESS MORON!"

'_Oh boy here we go.'_

"RIDICULES IDEAS THAT YOU COME UP WITH-"

'_I wonder if I can get my book now…'_

"RECKLESS MISSIONS THAT DRIVE EVERY ONE INSANE!"

'_Ooh, looks like he's winding down now. Time for the water works.'_

Matt huffed as he left his brother 'sobbing' in his Virginia home. He had just spent the last three hours yelling at him about every stupid thing he had done that he got blamed for.

As the door closed Alfred looked up from his hands and sighed then pulled out a pair of ear plugs that were hidden by his sandy hair.

After standing up and popping his back he flopped back onto his sofa and grabbed the book he had been reading before the Canadian stormed in.

"Finally, I thought he would _never_ shut up."

* * *

_9foxgrl: I can't believe that I get more ideas for fan fics then I am for my term paper!_

_Arthur: You need to focus better_

_9foxgrl: But when I have to buckle down and study for so long, I get all fidgety! _

_Arthur: Then stop drinking all that soda. Americans._

_9foxgrl: Oh don't you start tea lover! I know that Earl Grey you're sipping has caffeine in it! _


	90. Breaking News

Ch. 90 Breaking News!

9foxgrl

"IGGY!"

Arthur was tackled by a crying Alfred just as he opened the door. The two went flying back into the sofa with Alfred being cradled in Arthur's arms.

"Alfred, what the Bloody Hell is wrong with you?"

"It's terrible, and scary." Alfred sobbed as cuddled into Arthur's chest.

"McDonald's go out of business? The world is ending?"

"No! I just found out that I'm going to be an Uncle!"

Arthur gawked. "Matt is going be a father?"

"No!" Alfred said looking up at the Brit with blue fearful eyes. "Astrid!"

Arthur froze. "Ivan…and Astrid are going to have a child?"

Alfred nodded.

"Do the Nordics know?"

"I came here after I told them." Alfred said trembling like a leaf.

"How did they take it?"

There was a gunshot in the distance. It was then followed by several more rounds being shot rapid fire and Russian curse words.

"I guess that answers my question." Arthur said as he patted Alfred on the head.

**Meanwhile **

Ivan was being chased around his house by an angry Tino who was cursing at him in Norse.

Upstairs Astrid, Natalya (who claimed dibs on being Godmother), Katyusha debated on names and designs for the nursery with Berwald (who was already designing a rocking chair). The crib he had made when Astrid had been cursed the year before was in storage and ready to use when ready.

Matt and the Baltics were downstairs in the basement hiding, and crying that the world was coming to an end.

**A/N: Does anyone think I should make a separate fanfic for this or is a one shot at the end of this one okay? **


	91. MiB

Ch. 91 MiB

9foxgrl

In 1947 when Tony first came to Earth my eyes were opened to the worlds outside of Earth. My fellow Nations do not choose to believe, EVEN AFTER I INTRODUCE THEM TO TONY. Thankfully for me a good amount of my citizens do. It's one of the reasons I promote so many science fiction movies.

But then in 1948 a bounty hunter from some planet in the Sting Ray nebula came to try and kill Tony. Luckily I knew the basics behind Tony's technology and used one of his plasma guns to rescue him from the guy. Just when I thought he was going to kill us, some Enforcers from Tony's planets arrived and blasted him into plasma goop.

Imagine the shock when I found out that Tony was the son of his planet's king, fourth youngest. The older three being mean to him a lot (apparently that's why he hates Arthur a lot, because they are so much alike it creeps him out). He told me that he just wanted to get away and be treated like a normal person…errs alien and not like nobility. When he came to Earth his ship's power crystal ran out and he crash landed in Roswell.

After that I got a summons to meet the councilors at the Galaxy Alliance meeting to be held on Pluto. Tony and my Boss Truman made me wear my fanciest military dress uniform. After being presented with an award for valor (it's a cool glowing orb) I asked if there were more aliens who came to Earth and any possible danger they could face to the human race if caught.

After a lot of work and agreement from Truman the MiB (Men in Black) Agency was created with me as the first leader of the Agency until 1960 when I stepped down. We are a top secret division that was not on the books. I went around and found my citizens would make great agents and created the first task forces, included the hidden cells in other countries to help monitor off world visitors.

**December 21, 2012**

The Galaxy Alliance informed me that potentially hostile fleet from the Bode's galaxy would be passing dangerously close to Earth. They thought that Earth was a reservoir of valuable resources and slaves that they could add as they attempted to conquer every possible life sustaining planet they came across.

Luckily we had prepared for this with NASA and the Air Force. With help from the agents we spread a rumor that something big and bad was going to happen today. Our fleet was ready, and in orbit along with the Martians. Tony was in charge up there while I was in charge of the ground forces.

**New York – MiB Headquarters**

"Hello Agent K, Agent J. Come in there is someone I want you to meet." Zed said as his two best agents came into his office.

I gave them my best mysterious grin as I turned in my chair to face them.

"Hello, I'm Agent A. The Founder of MiB and commander of the Earth Defense Forces. I hope your're ready cowboys, because it's going to be a fun day."


	92. Platypus

Ch. 92 He's Just a Platypus

9foxgrl

"Alfred?"

"Yes?"

"What is that?"

Alfred peeked out the buildings large windows.

"…A platypus."

"Wearing a fedora and fighting a pharmacist on a weird hover craft held up by balloon?"

"Yes."

"And you don't find that weird, aru?"

Alfred raised a brow curiously. He was so used to the wacky events that happened here. "Dude, this is the Tri-State area! Nothing here is normal. For example those two tree house wrestling on 8th Street."

"…"

"…"

"Ve~ It looks fun."

"…"

"…What the bloody hell?"

"Your people are so strange!"

"Whatever." Alfred said as he took his seat and gave the platypus a peace sign. "S'up Perry!"

To their shock the platypus tilted his fedora to him in a salute then jumped off the balloon just as it exploded.

"CURSE YOU PERRY THE PLATYPUS!"

_A/N: I will do the battle for MiB tomorrow or later. Right now I just wanted to give you all this. Peace out!_


	93. Alien Wars

Ch. 93 Alien Wars

9foxgrl

Alfred cursed in anger as dodged another laser beam on his XZCycle (a flying motorcycle). Behind him were several other MiB agents and a few Martians that were helping the ground forces. Up above he could see faint blasts from the skies where Tony and the Terra Space Battleships were doing battle with the invading fleet.

Without even being at HQ, Alfred knew Tony's own ship (Sagittarius III) was causing most of the damage to invading fleet.

"Zed, SitRep?" Alfred yelled into his communicator as he shot down two centipedes like aliens that tried to knock him out of the sky.

"_The Terra Forces have managed to hold off the rest of the Fleet from entering Earth's atmosphere. So we only have the ships in New York and Los Angeles to deal with."_

"Damn! What about those Classified Neutrals that was at my house this morning?"

"_K & J have them sedated and under protection."_

"Well that is good. Tell the AF to active the G-guns and get these bogies out of the skies!" Alfred yelled as he dodged another proton blast then signaled his team to shoot the invaders.

"_Got it A."_

One round of fluorescent blasts the aliens turned to goop. Two of them started to regenerate.

'_Damn I hate Bugs!'_

"V FORMATION!" Alfred yelled to his agents as they flew closer together with one of the agents with a proton cannon right behind him. As soon as they got in range the agent fired the cannon attached to her cycle's platform.

Alfred watched with almost sadistic glee as a small cruiser carrying the ship several Bugs crashed into flames.

A loud hum from the Empire State building was the only warning the invading forces had before the large EP (electro pulse) cannons fired and took out two of the larger invading ships.

"Two down…a heck of a lot to go." Alfred huffed as he gunned the XZCycle and sped off to battle.

After what seemed like hours the invasion was over. The Bugs that had landed on Earth had been killed and those who were still on the ships fled the solar system. Tony had apparently broken through the fleet's ranks and quote _"Destroyed the fucking Queen's ship"._

Without a queen the Bugs would have no choice but to return to home and choose a new queen, otherwise their race would die.

**MiB HQ – Alfred's POV**

"Good work today everyone." I said as the guys monitoring the cells abroad activated the large memory neurolizers across the world to wipe the memories of anyone seeing the invasion.

Locations: Big Ben- London, Statue of Liberty- Ellis Island, Eiffel Tower- Paris, Tokyo Tower- Tokyo.

The list goes on.

While I like to think I can trust my fellow Nations, I know what could happen if one of them got a hold of alien technology. Even a small proton gun. Forget WWIV, it would be the end of life on Earth. Some of them…are far too trigger happy.

"Not bad having you back A."

"Thanks Zed." I replied as he walked with me to the elevator. "It was cool being back. How did it go with that girl from Naga?"

"Ah, had to break it off. She was all fangs, no tongue if you know what I mean."

"Harsh."

"Take care A."

"You too Zed."

**Alfred's Home- District of Columbia**

I arrived home just as the Nations were waking up. Thankfully J & K had thought of neurolyzing them, so they thought they spent the day watching a movie marathon while I was at an emergency meeting.

I think one of them nearly had a heart attack when they saw me still in my MiB suit.

Listening to them babble about a video they couldn't remember the title of I just smile.

It was times like this I am reminded why I never tell them of my role in intergalactic politics.

**A/N: Hope this was satisfying. So If I didn't go into much more detail about the fights (I suck at battle scenes). **

**Only 7 Chapters left in Brotherly Moments with Ivan's & Astrid's wedding as no. 100! So please send me any requests you got so I can type away on the two days free of finals!**


	94. Behavior Training

Ch. 94 Behavior Training!

9foxgrl

_Inspired by russia fan, Upsilon Forty-Two, silverheartlugia2000 and IronicNarwhal's fan fic __Sealandic Code of Conduct _

There are just some issues with the most immature people like Peter and Im Yong that have been driving the Nations of the U.N. up the wall. Even Im Yong's brother Kim Sung (North Korea) was annoyed and he barely spoke to his brother.

It was actually to the point their caretakers were begging others to babysit them. Especially after they started a food fights during one of Yao's big fancy dinner parties.

_Flashback_

"_Hey there Im!" Peter cheered as he found one of his fellow cohorts in crime standing by one of the large buffet tables. "Why are you hiding out over here?"_

"_Avoiding Yao! He made me wear these traditional robes daze~!" Im Yong groaned as he shuffled in his itchy stiff clothes. _

"_Yeah, so did Mamma and Pappa." Peter grumbled as he pulled at his bow tie._

"_I'm bored."_

"_Me too."_

_The boys turned behind them and looked at the large plates of food, then grinned. They both grabbed a bowl and the serving spoon before yelling in unison as they hit one of the Europeans with a face full of food._

"_FOOD FIGHT!"_

_End flashback_

Naturally everyone was surprised and suspicious when Matt and Alfred volunteered to watch them during a three day meeting of the European and Asian Nations.

The boys eagerly agreed, thinking they were in for a week of fun. They got to share a room in America's house in Maine. Even though told them lights out at ten o'clock because they were getting up early, they stayed up until one in the morning thinking that Alfred would just sleep in.

Oh were they wrong.

**Day 1- Boot Camp**

Im Yong and Peter screamed as they were awakened at 5 am by Alfred busting into their guest room playing Reveille on his bugle. He was wearing his U.S. corps Marine fatigues and instead of Texas he wore a pair of aviators.

"RISE AND SHINE MAGGOTS! STOP LOUNGING AND GET UP!" Alfred yelled yanking the blankets off of them.

"Nngh…it's too early!" Peter groaned as he tried to crawl back into bed, only to be hoist out of it.

"Well, you should have thought of that before you two stayed up all night." Alfred snapped as he lifted Im from the top bunk. "Now get dressed in some exercise gear and get down to the kitchen if you want breakfast. You've got five minutes"

After a light breakfast Alfred had the boys go outside and do some stretches before making them run six times around the block. They were cursing because Alfred had ran twenty laps in the time it took them just to do six.

"Come one, you two should be able to handle this kind of stuff!" Alfred scolded as they collapsed in the yard after an hour of jumping jacks, push ups, and sprints he called suicides. "Especially you Peter. If you want to be a Nation you have to hold your own."

"씨 발"* Im groaned as he finished drinking his water bottle.

"Jerk." Groaned Peter.

"THAT'S IT! I'VE HAD IT!" Alfred snapped making them jump. "YOU TWO ARE TWO OF THE MOST DISRESPECTFUL CHILDREN I HAVE EVER MET! WHEN I WAS YOUNG IF YOU SPOKE BACK TO YOU ELDERS YOU WOULD GET A TURN OVER THE KNEE! LUCKY FOR YOU I AM NOT ALLOWED TO DO THAT! WHILE YOUR'RE HERE, I EXPECT YOU TO BEHAVE LIKE YOU HAVE COMMON SENSE! YOU WANT TO BE ADULTS, WELL I AM GOING TO TREAT YOU LIKE ONE! I MAY NOT HAVE SILVER HAIR, BUT I DO HAVE SILVER BULLETS, DO YOU WANT ONE?"

"SIR, NO SIR!" Peter and Im yelled.

"Good!" Alfred said with a more calm face. "Noe get inside and clean up while I start my work. If you make a mess, clean it up. Understand?"

"SIR YES SIR!" Peter and Im yelled.

"Good, lunch is at 1200 hours." Alfred said heading up to his office. "Dismissed!"

The boys shared a look and began to pray for Matt to come get them.

**Day 2- Needed Education**

After another rude awakening by Alfred and exercise regimen the boys were practically in tears when Matt came to take them out for a day.

To their shock he was taking them to a beach in Ontario where the women were allowed to go topless. While Peter was a bit confused (innocent) about it, Im ran and grabbed the first woman he saw…

Only to be slapped and dragged by a group of woman who gave him a thirty minute lecture on why he should not be so disrespectful to women.

Needless to say he got the picture after Matt took them to a community center where their age group (12-15) was having a Sex Ed class that included a video about STDs.

To say Alfred was curious when the boys returned home looking a little green around the gills was an understatement.

**Day 3- A Little Break**

The boys woke up at five o'clock on their own in order to avoid another bugle. But to their shock there was none. Finally they got the courage to go check on Alfred, only to see him asleep in his study with a cold cup of coffee, and a stack of essays from the college he was currently teaching at beside him.

"Go back to bed." Alfred muttered in his sleep. "Unless you _want_ me to call one of my _Navy Seal_ buddies over to come and run you through a _real_ P.T."

The boys couldn't run back to their guest room fast enough.

The two slept for another hour before the smell of pancakes attracted them to the kitchen. They drooled as they found Matt at the stove with a large stack of pancakes on the table. It was around eight o'clock when Alfred staggered from his study for a mug of coffee.

They all winced as his head hit the mahogany table upon sitting down.

"Is it really that bad to be a Nation?" Peter whimpered.

"No, that is what happens when you teach a summer course at a large inner city college AND a Nation."

When it was time to leave the boys were reminded that if they ever misbehaved, they were going to get a visit from Alfred and his bugle at five in the morning again.

To this day the other Nations still didn't know what the Twins did to make them behave.

Translations:

씨 발 – Fuck you

p.s. If you got the Madea line you get a high five!


	95. Facebook

Ch. 95 Facebook

9foxgrl

**Alfred Jones **Just got back from V Hunting in Chicago

_Friday at 12:04 am _

_Matt Williams and Astrid Hedvig like this_

**Matt Williams **How many?

**Alfred Jones **an entire coven. XD

**Peter Kirkland **did they sparkle?

**Alfred Jones **that joke has gotten so lame

**Berwald Oxenstierna **Go to sleep Peter!

_Tino Väinämöinen likes this_

* * *

**Astrid Hedvig **Ugh, stupid morning sickness has started

_Monday at 7:12 am_

**Tino Väinämöinen** It just means the baby is healthy sweetie!

**Matt Williams **try some crackers and weak tea sis

_Astrid Hedvig likes this_

**Astrid Hedvig **If this continues for the rest of the pregnancy, I might shoot my boyfriend when it comes time to give birth

_Tino Väinämöinen and Berwald Oxenstierna likes this _

**Tino Väinämöinen** You can borrow my silencer! XD

* * *

**Astrid Hedvig **and** Ivan Braginski **are now engaged

_Wednesday at 7:34 pm _

_Everyone Likes this_

**Feliciano Vargas **CONGRATULATIONS VE~!

_Wednesday at 7:35 pm_

**Alfred Jones: **Congrats Big sis!

_Wednesday at 7:35 pm_

**Elizabeta Hedervary **Congrats!

_Wednesday at 7:39 pm_

**Tino Väinämöinen** MY BABY!

_Wednesday at 7:40 pm_

**Lili Zwingli** Congratulations Astrid

_Wednesday at 7:45 pm_

* * *

**Astrid Hedvig – Jeannette Arcadia** Are you still a wedding planner?

_Thursday at 9:12 am_

**Jeannette Arcadia** Of course.

_5 minutes ago_

**Astrid Hedvig** Can you help me plan mine?

_5 minutes ago_

**Jeannette Arcadia **OMG! Yes!

_4 minutes ago_

**Astrid Hedvig** Thank you!

_2 minutes ago_

**Jeannette Arcadia** NP. Just swing by my flat in Manhattan this weekend so we can design it! Bring the hubby to be too!

_1 minute ago_

* * *

**Ivan Braginski - Toris Laurinaitis **I'll be going to NY for the weekend. Watch the house

_Thursday at 7:32 pm_

**Toris Laurinaitis **Yes sir

* * *

**Ivan Braginski **this wedding planner is scary!

_Saturday at 1:53 pm_

**Alfred Jones **U at Jeannette's?

**Ivan Braginski** Da

**Matt Williams** Watch out, if she starts yelling in French then she's either very excited or ver annoyed.

**Francis Bonnefoy** Hon hon hon what is her name?

**Matt Williams** Jeannette Arcadia.

**Francis Bonnefoy **O.O asdfhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhalfhr uei;huqhfds;fafd

**Matt Williams** ?

**Alfred Jones **is he okay?

**Arthur Kirkland **He's fainted. Who is this girl?

**Matt Williams **Check my profile

**Arthur Kirkland **HOLY MOTHER OF-AEIOTUQWE230-4I8!

**Alfred Jones **Iggy? U okay dude?

* * *

**Arthur Kirkland **THE DEAD ARE RISING!

A/N: I came across a site called _If Historical Events had Facebook Statuses _it was hilarious.


	96. Trapped in Darkness

Ch. 96 Trapped in Darkness

9foxgrl

_This is a preview of a short fanfiction I am currently working on. Reviews are welcomed!_

I am trapped in a world of darkness.

My sight was taken.

When they came and burned my Capital.

I would love to hate them…

But that will not give back my sight.

I would love to hurt them.

But it will not heal me.

I want to cry.

But I have no more tears to shed.

The rain is my tears.

This is my life in darkness.

This is my curse,

My pain.

And my alone.

My name is Alfred F. Jones

Personification of the United States of America

I am blind.


	97. Punschkrapfen

Ch. 97 Punschkrapfen

9foxgrl

_Inspired by Dark Inu Fan _

Another team building exercise, this time held by Francis. Naturally everyone was afraid that he would push them to do something R rated, but to their shock all they had to do was split up into teams and bake a pastry without setting his kitchen on fire.

Arthur was moderately surprised when the Twins volunteered to work with him right off the bat. Matt dragged a mortified Gilbert into their team to assist.

"...so what are we making?"

"Punschkrapfen." Matt said enthusiastically. Gilbert cheered in agreement.

Alfred blinked in understanding while Arthur looked confused.

"It's an Austrian punch cake soaked in rum." Gilbert explained.

Arthur's grinned at the word rum. Matt turned to his brother (aka the Living International Cookbook).

"You know the recipe?"

"Of course Bro. I made some a few days ago."

"Alright, Arthur and Gil, you guys help prep the ingredients. Al does the mixing, I'll decorate and keep our area clean."

"So Al, what do we need?"

One hour later 'Team Awesome' as Gilbert had dubbed them had finished their cakes and were now ready to taste them.

"Okay, we're in agreement. Eat only one, feed the rest to Roddy to get him smashed."

"Agreed."

In sync they stabbed their cakes and took a bit.

"Oh...My Gosh..."

"MEIN GOTT! THIS IS AWESOME!" Gilbert yelled attracting many a Nations attention to their cooking station.

"These are great." Alfred said licking the frosting off his fingertips.

"Give me the recipe later okay?"

"Sure."

"while you two do that, Birdie and I got an hypothesis to test." Gilbert say taking a plate full of the cakes to were Roderich and Elizabeta were with Ludwig and Feliciano. Matt was on his heels with a camera.

"Dare I ask, what hypothesis they are going to test?"

"That Punschkrapfen renders the typical Austrian character. Red outside, brown inside, and always a little smashed."


	98. Smell, Walk, Dance

Ch. 98 Smell, Walk, Dance

9foxgrl

Smell – Inspired by _Dragonfly-Moonlight_

"Mattie, what is this I hear about you creating a pizza scented perfume?"

"Oh you mean the Pizza Hut perfume? It's true."

"…I don't know how to reply to that."

"Do you want a bottle?"

"...Not a good idea, I might end up trying to eat my clothes in my sleep or something."

* * *

Walk

"Like OMG! Mattie! Allie! I had no idea you too had it in you!"

The Twins looked up wearily form their chairs and paled at the sight of an envelope stamped with _Odette Modeling _in Feliks' hands.

"…Oh no…"

"What is that Feliks?"

"Photos from the fashion show that was in Warsaw last night. You should see the Twins in their outfits! They like, totally stole the show!"

The Twins blushed as some curious Nations crowded around Feliks as he took out enlarged photos of the Twins with seductive smiles walking down the fashion runway in various outfits.

Seeing the stares Alfred explained.

"One of Jeannette's and Astrid's friends said that she could design her wedding dress if…she quote 'brought her a pair of sexy boys to wear her new designs in Warsaw' end quote."

Matt coughed nervously.

"ES EL DIABLO!" Antonio suddenly shrieked as Feliks took out a photo of Alfred with a cruel, seductive smile in a long blue overcoat that was based off the designs of pirate's jackets.

Matt smiled. "Oh yeah, that's the one you said that looked like your old pirate jacket isn't it Al?"

"YOU WERE A PIRATE?"

Alfred just blushed.

* * *

Dance Inspired by _RaymooHakurei_

Times Square was jumping as a pair of twin DJs dressed in blue and red hoodies were blasting music from a platform.

_DISCO POGO, dingelingeling, dingelingeling._

_Alle Atzen sing'n_

_DISCO POGO, dingelingeling, dingelingeling._

_Alle Atzen sing'n_

_Die Masse rockt,_

_Wir sind bekloppt._

_Wir pogen, don't stop the rock._

_Wir baden in der Me-Me-Menge,_

_Darauf hab ich Bock!_

_Voll normal verfeiern mit._

_Ich fass mir auch mal in den Schritt._

_Breakdance, oder Atzentanz,_

_Wir tanzen heut' den Pogohit!_

Later that night when they were bailed out of jail by their not so amused bosses, all they had to say was:

"So worth it."

**A/N: For those of you who want to read more of Ch. 96 I have started the fan fiction **_Trapped in Darkness. _**But be warned; it's a USUK story so if you don't like you don't have to read. **


	99. Invisibility, Captain, Respect

Ch. 99 Invisibility, Captain, Respect

9foxgrl

Invisibility – Inspired by _A Friend_

"Alfred…"

"Alfred?"

"Alfred?"

"SHH!"

"Where are you?"

"Right here." Alfred said appearing out of nowhere.

"…Bloody Hell is that-?"

"An invisibility cloak? Yes, yes it is."

"And what are you doing with it?"

"…Pranking Feliks as revenge for giving out those photos of us."

"…By doing what?"

"Dyeing his clothes black. I'm going to hit Francis next."

"…scoot over."

Captain – Inspired by _HetaPastaH3ro_

It all started when Matt sped walked into a meeting wearing a merchant's outfit from the 1800s. He was also sopping wet from the heavy down pour.

"Sorry, we're late. We finished filming late. Al's right behind me, he had to take the long way to avoid his crazy fans."

"Filming what?"

"It's an action movie based on the Atlantic Phantom Pirate."

Antonio and Francis screamed.

"No not him!"

"NOT EL DIABLO!"

"Who?" several Nations questioned.

"A pirate who only went after our ships. He would appear out of nowhere, raid the ships then set the crew adrift in their lifeboat before blowing the ship up to pieces! He was a sadistic bastard!"

"That's only because ye bastards kept trying to raids _my_ coast."

Antonio and Francis screamed as Alfred appeared behind them just a bolt of lightning crashed behind them making him look more venomous then he already was.

"He can't be here, he can't be."

"I am here, and in the flesh." Alfred said with a cruel cackle.

"No! No es~! He's dead! We paid his crew to kill him!"

"What ye say _Espana_?" Alfred hissed making Antonio faint.

"...Now Mon Ami...please understand."

Francis was cut off as Alfred pointed a buccaneer styled pistol as his throat.

Respect 

The worse of Hurricane Sandy was over, but it was still pouring buckets. But Alfred didn't care that he was nearly frozen, and completely drenched. His teeth were chattering, but he continued to walk at his post.

He did this before during a snow storm. He could endure a little rain.

Back and Forth, back and forth.

He was vaguely aware of the people under umbrellas standing nearby. One of them was filming for the Weather Channel.

"It is requested, that everyone maintains a level of silence, and respect!" Alfred yelled as he reached his mark, and then continued walking.

The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier must always be respected.

**Going on vacation so I won't be able to update for a while. **

**But don't worry! I will be back with NUMBER 100!**

**9foxgrl**


	100. Wedding

Ch. 100 Weddings

9foxgrl

The N. America twins felt a little humiliated. Since Astrid and Ivan were having a traditional wedding they needed a minimum of six bridesmaids, seven for good luck. But since Astrid did not have many close female friends they only had five; Natalya, Katyusha, Elizabetha, and Bella. Feliks cross dressing allowed him to be one.

So she decided two of the slots would be filled by her siblings.

A week before the wedding, and one spell later, Alfred and Matt were now Amelia and Madeline. They would be escorted by Arthur and Gilbert. The two men actually had to fight a group of suitors who volunteered when they saw the new female nations.

It was a lovely wedding. Ivan even convinced his boss to allow for it to happen in St. Basil's Cathedral. Feliks and the girls took charge and decorated the room with white and greens. Bouquets of sunflowers and other bright yellow flowers decorated the room.

"They really went out when it came to decorating didn't they?" Arthur said aloud.

"They sure did."

Arthur turned, and let his jaw drop. Amelia stood there in a light orange dress that turned yellow at the skirt that cut off at her knees at the front. Her short blonde hair was down, and the only jewelry she were a pair of teardrop shaped gold earrings.

'_Beautiful…'_

"Arthur?"

'_Like…a fay of the meadow…'_

"Iggy!"

"Huh!" Arthur gasped as Amelia lightly smacked him with her bouquet of flowers.

"Are you still there? I thought you went to La La Land for a minute."

Arthur blushed. "Sorry…it's just…you look really beautiful."

Amelia blushed so red that she looked like a bright flower. It just made Arthur blush even harder.

'_Damn it! I've dealt with the worse of Nations, pirates…why the Hell is a woman making me so nervous?'_

"HEY! Get in lines you guys!" Selene (Seychelles) and Astrid's friend Jeannette Arcadia yelled as they strolled their way with a clipboard. "The ceremony is about to begin."

"…She's tenacious." Arthur said as he saw Francis once again try in vain to flirt with the New York wedding coordinator. He could understand why; she did look exactly like Joan of Arc. Hell it scared him when they first met in person.

"She is also one of the scariest wedding planners ever." Amelia muttered as she took Arthur's elbow and moved into the line behind Kat and Eduard. Behind them Gilbert was laughing with Madeline as Gilbird perched in her bouquet of flowers.

The wedding ceremony carried out without interruptions as did the reception since none of the guests dared to do anything that might piss off the bride, especially then caught a glint of a pistol at her ankle as she walked down the aisle.

Ivan's jaw dropped when he saw her being escorted in by a stony face Berwald. Her dress was pure white with little designs stitched in skirt and bodice with faint yellow thread. The skirt seemed to whispers as it brushed along the floor.

When it came time for the vows there was not a dry eye in the house. Tino's quiet sobs were audible as Berwald and Lukas tried to soothe him.

At the end when Astrid threw her bouquet Madeline caught it and fell back into Gilbert's grasp. He grinned then took her to the dance floor when the next slow dance started. Francis threw a dark look at the Prussian before going to get another drink of wine and make another attempt to flirt with Jeannette who was now more social.

"They look so cute together." Amelia commented as watched Madeline and Gilbert dance across the ball room. They were perfect, dancing at an even tempo, pausing only to avoid Feliciano (who changed into an evening gown for some reason) practically dragging Ludwig across dance floor with Lovino and Antonio not far behind. "Don't they Arthur?"

"Uh huh." Arthur replied with a half lidded glaze as he stared at her. "Lovely."

Amelia looked back at him and raised a brow at his pink adorned cheeks. Then to his nearly empty champagne flute. "Iggy are you drunk? Because I'm not protecting you from Sis if you do something crazy tonight."

Arthur's blushed seemed to deepen as their eyes met and stood, offering her his hand. "I'm not drunk love... Care to dance?"

It was then Amelia's turn to blush before she nodded and followed him out to the dance floor.

The night ended, for once peacefully. With no fights which was a record considering all the Nation representations that were there. The girls all hugged and laughed with Astrid as she and Ivan were about to leave by limo for their honeymoon. The twins watched the limo pull away, it had just left the city when Amelia paled.

"Did Sis give you the counter spell Maddie?"

"I thought she gave it to you."

Neither noticed their dates for the evening light up at this revelation.

The twins stared at each other as they realized they didn't know how to change back. "…Oh Hell."

**Well that's the end.**

**Thanks for reading every one.**

**And if I don't post beforehand:**

**MERRY CHRISTMAS/HAPPY HOLIDAYS!**

**Peace Out**

**And **

**HAPPY NEW YEARS!**

**9foxgrl**


	101. Extras & Ending Credits!

**If this was a movie, this is where you would see the **

**ENDING CREDITS**

**Instead here are some of my final one shot ideas**

**50 States**

"How the Hell did you spawn fifty children without us knowing?"

"Mon Dieu! There's a clone of you Arthur!"

"Hi I'm West Virginia! Why is that man turning purple Daddy?"

THUD!

"Is he dead Daddy?"

"Can I fix him up?"

"He's just unconscious Illinois. North Carolina, put that cranium saw away."

"Aww…"

**Provinces**

"FIRST ALFRED, NOW YOU MATIEU? DO I HAVE ANY MORE GRANDCHILDREN I SHOULD KNOW ABOUT?"

"Nova Scotia; give Alberta back his hat! Quebec, British Columbia stop fighting! Maple! Sorry Francis, what did you say?"

"I need a drink."

"I got some."

"Ontario! Where did you get that?"

"…Not from Netherlands."

**Mama Native America**

"Your kids turned out great Comeka."

"Yes they did."

"…"

"And if that fool hurts my girl, I'm going to haunt his ass."

"I believe you."

**Heroes**

"With this great strength comes great responsibility! I must use this power only for the innocent!"

"George?"

"Yes John?"

"Our Nation is a strange one."

**Showdown**

"It's so nice that Natalya won't be hounding after Ivan anymore."

"Yup, and all it took was a showdown and the destruction of a Hollywood set."

"WHY? DID YOU DESTROY MY FAVORITE WESTERN SET?"

"Is he okay?"

"He will with time."

**Speak Up**

"Who are you?"

POW!

"FOR THE MILLIONTH FUCKING TIME! I'M CANADA!"

**Lacrosse**

WHAM!

"My vital regions!"

"WHAT PART OF 'THEY USE THIS AS AN EXCUSE TO HIT PEOPLE' DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?"

"Watch out!"

"GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!"

**Chase Scene**

"Is that a stolen double decker spray painted purple?"

"Forget that, it that Iggy driving?"

"Dressed like a Death Eater…that's a new one."

"_STUN THEM FLYING MINT BUNNY!"_

"And he's drunk…wonderful."

_CRASH!_

"…Did he?"

"Just drive into Parliament? Yeah."

"Al, we said we would never let him try that moonshine of yours for a reason!"

**Rock Out**

"_By reading the seven stars_

_I can predict the tomorrow_

_Curry, Chinese cuisine, my holiday houses meals_

_Meat pie is delicious!_

_I shrink away from uncivilized behavior_

_Both manners and tradition,_

_Wit is good as well_

_No pain, no gain!_

_Orders are orders!"_

"Sacre bleu, I forgot that Arthur was a good singer."

"_I believe, that's right!_

_In phenomena, Busby's chair, predictions_

_Ancient ghost-summoning_

_My ultimate weapon, come forth!"_

**Sanity**

"What is Alfred doing?"

*giggle*

"Starring at a wall and giggling."

"It's creepy, aru."

"What could he be thinking about?"

"For your sakes, you don't want to know."

"Why?"

"Because, you might lose your senses of sanity."

*giggle*

**Racing**

"Whose brilliant idea was it to have Feliciano and Alfred race each other in an official NASCAR race?"

"…Gilbert…"

"…"

"Bruder, you didn't."

"What? The awesome me wanted to drive."

"Fratello if you win, I will give you all the pasta you can eat!"

"FOR THE PASTA~!"

**Bets**

"This is madness!"

"Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!"

WHAM!

"See Al, I told you he would do that if he ever got mad at Turkey."

"Fine, I owe you a Timmy's coffee."

**Hunting**

"Mon Dieu…what did that deer ever do to him?"

"He just killed it with his bare hands and teeth, aru!"

"It was like watching a wolf kill a sheep."

"That…was too awesome for words."

"Alfred…did you know your brother could do that?"

"Hmh?"

"WHAT THE HELL, YOU TOO?"

**Thank you everyone for reviewing and sticking with Brotherly Moments. **

**I hope you all enjoyed reading these as much as I had fun writing. **

**If you laughed at least once then I did my job.**

**Peace Out!**

**9foxgrl**


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